Intro: Choking on the Red Pill… Need water

[rastamonParticipant 44]

Greetings,

After lurking on several MGTOW forums for nearly a year, I have realized that in order to progress, I will need to take a more active role (both in life and in the forums). I’ll start with a short bio about myself, I’m 29, married to a European, no kids, no common investments (i.e. house, car, etc.). Yes, I know, I have already committed a cardinal sin by getting married. One that was only compounded when she immigrated here. But I am still relatively free since we don’t have children (…relatively).

Upon discovering the red pill earlier this year and subsequently devouring as much information on the web as possible. I decided I wanted to wake up from the dream (read:nightmare) and start living my life for me. I gathered up the courage to ask her for a divorce. After many arguments and several tear-filled discussions over the course of two weeks, we reached the agreement that she would move back home. We even packed the boxes and found a shipping company…

But then, my deeply conditioned beta male came out in the nick of time. In a matter of hours… nay, minutes, I undid everything that I had worked for over the previous two weeks. I told her I was sorry and that I wanted her to stay and that we would make it work. So here I am, four months later, she’s still here and I am trying very hard to make it work. You could say that had I regurgitated the red pill before it could be fully digested.

Last week, after several code silver (selfishness) and code green (puerility) shaming attacks, I stumbled across my half-eaten red pill and remembered that these shaming attacks weren’t happening for the first time ever, but for the first time since before the “divorce” talk. She had been on her best behavior, lulling me into a false sense of comfort before re-revealing her true nature.

As I try to gobble down the red pill again, I’m faced with even more internal resistance. And I’m not surprised. The first time around, I read and absorbed the red pill mentality and it was enough to make me take action. I went 50% of the way through with a divorce and the whole world shamed me, ultimately breaking my red-pill will. To compound the problem, I was praised when I decided to “make it work.” I want to complete my red-pill transformation and it seems that I am having difficulty doing this on my own and in the face of so much disapproval.

So I am here in search of support, brotherhood and a little Red Pill Positive Reinforcement to help me wake up.

[OnMyWayParticipant 2]

Yo Bro – I’m not married so take what I say with a pinch (or fistful of salt) – this woman does not show you respect (though I suspect that unless one is truly a top quantile male women never do) just get divorced, you don’t have kids and what do you have to lose? A bit of sex – is it that great to put up with this? Do the following analysis: weigh up what she contributes to your life and what she takes from it, then take the opinion of the people who are actually affected by your relationship (which surprise, surprise is just you) into account. You’ll probably see her for what she is and get rid of her, good luck bro – routing for you.

[JanglesParticipant 18]

We’re here for you man. I have to say, are you happier more or less of the time? Wouldn’t say the relationship cant be salvaged but lines need to be drawn, and if she can’t accept that than you should part ways. Call out her shaming tactics, and while there’s nothing wrong with sharing or caring about her, you have to live for you too. Mostly for you I’d say. Just know that if you do decide to go your own way, I’d be happy to welcome you to the road. You don’t have to worry about walking alone.

[Primus_PilusParticipant 41]

If you are going to get a divorce get off the east / west coasts and move to Texas. Otherwise you are setting yourself up to be enslaved for LIFE (alimony payments are for life in certain parts of the country so BEWARE)

Divorce is war and be prepared to play chess against her checkers. If you have to appear blue pill for 6 months while you relocate into a decent divorce jurisdiction (and do some serious homework on it) then do so.

Take this as an extremely dire warning regarding what you are about to go through.

[Anonymous 0]

Shalom Brother.

All i can tell you is sometimes you have to take it one breath at a time.

[KeymasterKeymaster]

I want to complete my red-pill transformation and it seems that I am having difficulty doing this on my own and in the face of so much disapproval.

Make their Disapproval meaningless to you.
You don’t need a woman’s approval (or anyone’s) – for anything.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[HoratiusParticipant 4]

Alright, I have been reading this forum for a while and have truly grown to appreciate it. Yet have not been planning on posting on here for a while. Mainly due to the fact that I have been pretty busy, going through a divorce. But, after I read this post, I realized that I have to put my selfishness/own problems aside, to advise a brother that can hopefully learn from my mistakes.

As I already mentioned, I am going through a divorce. As you, I am also 29. Only difference is that I have a daughter of almost 2years.

Now, there is no point of me describing my situation in detail in this forum(need to do that in the intro section), but will give you a piece of advise my grandfather gave me when I was a teen.

About 15 years ago, when I started going out with my first girlfriend. My grandfather set me down(sorry if my english is bad, but its my third language) and told me that I needed to analyse my girlfriend. I needed to look all the negative things. I needed to look at if she was selfish, shamed me, lied to me, was condescending, or anything else that I could make out. Then he said, multiply all of her negative behaviors and attitudes by 100, and you will come close to understanding how she will act towards you once you are married. But, he said. If you have a child, then you should multiply her negative behavior by a 1000 times.

So, brother, please think about this and learn from my and the rest of your brothers mistakes.

(i apologize for the grammar and some other mistakes. English is my third language, plus I am a little drunk(going through a effing divorce))

[KeymasterKeymaster]

@horatius No need to apologize for your English at all. Your 3ND language is far better than most people’s 2ND. Count on it. Delighted you stepped in to help another brother out. Wishing you every success with your divorce and perhaps we will read from you about it when the time is right. Respect.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[rastamonParticipant 44]

@horatius Thank you and thank you to your grandfather for this wisdom. Your story gives me strength to make the necessary decisions before my situation becomes more dire.

@keymaster I couldn’t have asked for a better response. I know that one of my weaknesses is my need for approval. But at the end of the day, the only opinion that counts is my own.

@jangles your response made me think. I did keep a sort of “pro/con” tally, leading up to the first time I asked for a divorce, but in the wake of making up, I destroyed all of the notes I had kept. I have started a fresh tally again and at the moment, the scales are tipped in favor of divorce.

To all – joining this forum was the best decision I have made in months. I can see that the support and brotherhood I was seeking is here in spades. I look forward to keeping you guys posted.

[KeymasterKeymaster]

And we look forward to hearing back from you. You’re very gracious. Good people here, I don’t mind saying.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[Author]

Posts