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SOLI2DE 7 months, 4 weeks ago.
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During my life, I’ve seen guys with hot girlfriends (and felt envy), watched men in movies playing characters that go through a huge struggle to get the woman they desire, read books about dating and relationships, asked other guys for dating advice, and put a lot of effort into self-improvement and overcoming social anxiety so I could date more women and increase my chances of getting laid. Getting laid has been a trial and error process—some women are easier to deal with than others. Some women just need alcohol.
When I was younger, I didn’t understand the rules of “THE GAME.” I didn’t understand female psychology or the oscillation of female mental states. I had no confidence, and my social status was worthless. I just wanted to date women for the good times. But dating sometimes felt like a job interview instead of a fun experience. I had to be responsible for providing entertainment and paying the bills. The woman only had to sit back, relax, and criticize my efforts. The law of the universe states that you get something of value when you give something of value, but that does not apply with women when you’re dating them. They have to be in the mood for kissing and sexual contact. If I can’t inspire that mood, I’m considered a failure at dating. I, alone, am a failure. No one will ever accuse a woman for failing to accommodate a man when she’s on a date. My performance: my charming personality, my “pick up artist (PUA) seduction skills”, and, possibly, my ability to pay the bills will determine whether or not I get access to her sexy body at the end of the day. You see, it’s all up to me. So I can’t complain about the nature of women—I have to create a strategy to overcome it.
If I can’t unlock the woman’s desire to have sex, it’s all my fault. That is what’s frustrating about the situation—my failure to develop a way to “game the system.” So that’s why I’m tired of THE GAME. I suppose I can’t really blame women for who they are. They just are who they are, and the situation is what it is. My frustration, at this point, is more with reality and THE GAME that the PUAs brag about mastering. Some men spend a lot of money to learn about THE GAME and experience a lot of humiliation during the trial and error process. Sometimes I wonder if the particular woman I’m trying to get (as a girlfriend) is even worth the effort. Sure, she looks beautiful, but her mind could be full of insane thoughts or she could be a drug addict. And I’ve met scores of beautiful women who would rather date a jerky guy who will bring out the best/worst of her emotions than date a nice, easy-going guy (like myself) who will try to make life easier for her. The fact that THE GAME had to be created to deal with reality makes me angry about the whole situation. It makes me fantasize about living in a world where I have easy access to pleasure.
THE GAME is a strategy for overcoming a woman’s defense when you approach her and “sweet talk” her into giving you her phone number and giving you a chance to date her. And it’s also about developing a cure for shyness/social anxiety, a strategy for entertaining women during a date, and carefully seducing women so they’ll follow you to your bedroom and spread their legs for you. The strategy (for dealing with the whole social setup) doesn’t care about you being nice/respectable, what you think women should be like, how many times you’ve felt embarrassed at social events, how many times you were rejected by women, how unfair the world is, and all that jazz. You either learn it or fail at dating.
The other options I can think of are:
1. Dramatically increasing your social status (so you don’t have to work hard to impress women).
2. Hiring prostitutes.
3. Giving up.Giving up makes sense to me if the odds are overwhelmingly against you. I think guys that want to date, but are failing miserably, should take a break from it. They should spend some time improving their lives, getting involved with hobbies, getting an educational degree, upgrading their careers, hanging out with friends/relatives, etc. They should try to create a worthwhile lifestyle when they are alone. If such a life attracts women along the journey, then good for them. If the journey becomes exciting, the women that didn’t want to date those guys in the past will miraculously change their minds. They will beg for a ride. How’s that for a mind f~~~?
"I saw that there comes a point, in the defeat of any man of virtue, when his own consent is needed for evil to win-and that no manner of injury done to him by others can succeed if he chooses to withhold his consent. I saw that I could put an end to your outrages by pronouncing a single word in my mind. I pronounced it. The word was ‘No.’" (Atlas Shrugged)
Excellent post, dating for the most part is like playing twister but with both hands tied behind your back. The whole idea harkens back to the Barbarossa saying ” the juice is not worth the squeeze.”
"what a waste of a life, to marry, give up your freedom, just for the hope of not dying alone. Don't get married Son."
What is a man’s worth? How can we measure it, from a consistent standpoint, one that is universally accepted?
If you ask that to anyone, it is all about the value that you can provide. Yep, just like if you were a bot, or a drone, some kind of a machine whom his only value is what you can do and give. No one values who you are, exception given to yourself.
So, what is the point of living for something that values you as much as the latest utility on the catalogue, and who will probably treat you in the same manner? I sincerely see none. I live to pleasure me, and only me. Call me selfish, I don’t mind! But I live for the person who will ALWAYS have my back: me.
I don’t care what a woman think, because it is simply her opinion, her standpoint. Same as another man.
I debate with my friends, and so I get my ideas and ideals tested in a real environment, with people I trust and that I know will be severely blunt with me, to the point of leaving my mind and ego beaten to a bloody pulp. Besides that, I live and let live.What I find it more funny, is that when you quit trying to play the game, the whole thig changes and the people who disdained you at that moment, start to suddenly take interest in you, for many different reasons… Some will be because they are nterested in how you broke the chains who binded us all, some will take interest because they cannot let a captive sneak out, others will try to understand where YOU failed and why you are abandoning something that they deemed as great, others will simply wonder where society wronged you so badly, that you wanted to get straight away from it.
Let them think what they want to think. It is their premise. You cannot simply control what they think, nor their actions, and frankly, it is idiotic to try to do so. So don’t even bother.
Live for your own benefit. Life for yourself. Let others find their way to you, if they surely wish for it.
Walk alone.
"Young was I once, I walked alone, and bewildered seemed in the way; then I found me another and rich I thought me, for man is the joy of man." Odin, Hàvamàl, stanza 47.
I was married and it was a s~~~show of divorce rape. As many men here will attest. So even the guys who get the women face lunacy and being screwed over. Even if you’re Brad Pitt. You have to see the pattern, live, learn and move on.
A man isn’t MGTOW not when he wants women in his life, but gives up. That’s inceldom.
You are MGTOW when you know that the juice isn’t worth the squeeze. When you recognize relationships fail a cost-benefit analysis because of the ridiculous ease of divorce rape or even just phony allegations. When you are awakened to the gynocentric society that exists around us to extract resources from men and dedistribute to women. Even from men who are not in relationships. That — especially — relationships with women are a ball and chain on YOUR abilities of self-ownership. And you take the rational action: walk away.
The other options I can think of are:
1. Dramatically increasing your social status (so you don’t have to work hard to impress women).
2. Hiring prostitutes.
3. Giving up.Your options (the “other option you can think of” was to learn game) all involve giving effort, attention, or resources to women. They are just different ways to feed the beast.
They should spend some time improving their lives, getting involved with hobbies, getting an educational degree, upgrading their careers, hanging out with friends/relatives, etc. They should try to create a worthwhile lifestyle when they are alone. If such a life attracts women along the journey, then good for them. If the journey becomes exciting, the women that didn’t want to date those guys in the past will miraculously change their minds. They will beg for a ride.
This is true. The point here is the MGTOW knows to do this for himself, not for women. And he knows better than to be seduced back to the plantation when women are attracted by his contentment, confidence, and most of all — resources.
I'm going my own way. Maybe I'll see you there.
It’s only a game if YOU CHOOSE to play.
Keep it SIMPLE..If you want sex hire a pro that is at your financial ability level to afford, and then just get on WITH YOUR LIFE.
If you desire friendship join a hobby based group and join a gym as well.
If you want companionship then get a dog or two.
In a World of Justin Beibers Be a Johnny Cash
I would recommend to any young man to focus on making and saving money. Money cures a lot of ill’s. If you don’t have the education and/or trade skill to earn more, than get the skills. Get the education. Don’t waste time and money dating. Use that time for a second job or a side business. If you want women, when you’ve got money, they’ll find you.
When I was sheltered in a happy marriage for 39 years, I had no idea how mercenary women are. When I became widowed with no debts, a good income, and a mill in the bank, I found out real quick.
Now I’m a nomad. I still have my house at home, but I’m going to sell it. I live in my camper trailer. I’ll spend the summer traveling the Rocky Mountains. I don’t plan to go home till October.
Some more advise. Be careful with prostitutes. It can become addictive. It’s illegal, dangerous, and can get very expensive.
You’re looking at this completely backwards. Stop focusing on changing yourself and making yourself miserable in an attempt to be worthy of women. It’s not a way to live. Instead, think about what you want in a woman, who they need to be in order to be with you. That not includes physical attractiveness and personality, but also who can appreciate your lifestyle, they way you want to live. So you reject the ones you don’t find attractive. You reject the ones with bitchy attitudes. AND you reject the ones who’s lifestyles don’t fit you’re own. The girl who likes to go to clubs on the weekends may be hot as hell, but she will be pulling you to the clubs with her, or miserable just hanging out at home or in the bar. She wants that BMW that you don’t want to pay for. All these things should be a turn off to you. She may be hot and all that, but you are not interested, because she’s not the girl you’re interested in.
You’ll find that 99% of women don’t meet your criteria. Get in the habit of evaluating, and almost surely rejecting, everyone you meet, for all reasons that apply. Stop thinking about what kind of impression you need to make in order to convince her that you’re someone you’re not, someone you don’t want to be.
Ok. Then do it.
I like your point that the dynamics of dating a woman are against the natural laws of the universe.
There is an undercurrent conclusion on the nature of women, that they are easily programmed and are dependent on men.
Yes there is also endless nonsense.
Many countries don’t “date” in any formal way, and if an expense is incurred it is expected that each party pays their own way.There is a technique that works here as well as with most things in life. That is to drop all precinceived notions, anxieties, and what you wish would happen or be the case, and simply allow the situation to speak for itself, as if you’ve never seen it before and are encountering it for the first time. It’s a good way to view a situation for what it really is. And then accept what it reveals to you, and decide from there how it fits into your life.
"Once you’ve taken care of the basics, there’s very little in this world for which your life is worth deferring." -David Hansson. "It’s not when women are mean or nasty that anything is out of the ordinary. It’s when they are NICE to you that you have to be on high alert..." -Jackinov.
One more point you make… you wish there were a fantasy world. There is. It’s called porn, and is a decent way to get some things out of your system. Just don’t overdo it or get addicted, and don’t masturbate so much you become physically desensitized (it can be permanent).
Actually, I’d say all sexual attraction is an appeal to some level of fantasy. And while you think you’re gaming females, they are gaming you—by luring you into projecting your own fantasies upon them. The good ones will wear a mask and try to look & act like your fantasy if they’re interested. That’s pretty much how the game works, especially if the point is “getting laid.”
The reality of being with a woman just might be a tad different, however, as you are coming to suspect.
"Once you’ve taken care of the basics, there’s very little in this world for which your life is worth deferring." -David Hansson. "It’s not when women are mean or nasty that anything is out of the ordinary. It’s when they are NICE to you that you have to be on high alert..." -Jackinov.
F~~~ them bitches. You are giving them too much power over your life. The more you ice them out the more they respect you. You are right , every guy should take a break. Like forever break away from the bondage that women are in our society. There is no good from a relationship with a woman. It’s all a treadmill for guys to die trying to please an unhappy woman.
Im monk 22 months, I have women orbiting me. Why ? Because women are psychotic. These women break there neck to talk to me, and I Do Whatever I Want to DO! The same 24 year old bitch that blows off a nice guy her own age , wants to f~~~ me in my truck with no effort. I’m not a bad boy, I’m actually a “nice” guy. They just think I’m a bad boy, because I don’t play the game. Walk away young bucks. It’s the best advice I got for you. Don’t play the game. Watch Wargames and be likes Joshua. Learn and realize your only option is to ice them out!
Galatians 5:1 (KJV) Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage.
It’s not a game, or if it is, it’s a dangerous one with the odds stacked in one players favour.
Getting laid is over-rated. I have sex once a week with a long term FWB. At my age, nearly 50, I am not seeking children.
You can also ‘date down’ as far as appearance or SMV. But really, if you aren’t having FUN with these women out of the sack, I would end the date early, if I was dating and had to put up with a bunch of bulls~~~ to get laid, it just isn’t worth it. And that is a typical date. Her talking about her problems. And typically bars and clubs, which I don’t enjoy.
Sounds like you have spent significant time and resources on women, reading books on Game, etc. Is that really the best use of resources? Working on your appearance and career will attract them, but most are just gold diggers that want to cohabitation or marry,
If getting laid on the regular is the goal, an FWB seems safer and much less effort.
As for ‘nice guys’, they present no challenge and are boring to a woman. Most women want an exciting project (man) that she is attracted to sexually, not a boring Nice Guy.
But really, if you aren’t having FUN with these women out of the sack, I would end the date early, if I was dating and had to put up with a bunch of bulls~~~ to get laid, it just isn’t worth it. And that is a typical date. Her talking about her problems. And typically bars and clubs, which I don’t enjoy.
And there it is in a nutshell for me.
When any woman mentions “a serious relationship”, I literally go emotionally numb and become totally disinterested in her/them.
Look, I have had more than enough seriousness in my life so far.
I’m just looking to be “happily” content with no additional drama or horse hockey that comes along when she wants to “get serious”.There was a time in my life when I gave a fuck. Now you have to pay ME for it
Grumpy: Yes, most men want a FUN relationship.
‘Serious’ is code for paying for everything and dealing with a s~~~ load of drama. Has she been ‘serious’ about saving, buying a house, advancing her career, etc whilst single? Then why are you supposed to be ‘serious’? Seriously?
I also have no issues with monogamy; for me it’s better — less chance of STD’s and you and your partner learn to please each other.
‘Where is this relationship going’, said no man, ever.
Part of that is most women desire children. After 40 that changes.
You’re looking at this completely backwards. Stop focusing on changing yourself and making yourself miserable in an attempt to be worthy of women. It’s not a way to live. Instead, think about what you want in a woman, who they need to be in order to be with you. That not includes physical attractiveness and personality, but also who can appreciate your lifestyle, they way you want to live. So you reject the ones you don’t find attractive. You reject the ones with bitchy attitudes. AND you reject the ones who’s lifestyles don’t fit you’re own. The girl who likes to go to clubs on the weekends may be hot as hell, but she will be pulling you to the clubs with her, or miserable just hanging out at home or in the bar. She wants that BMW that you don’t want to pay for. All these things should be a turn off to you. She may be hot and all that, but you are not interested, because she’s not the girl you’re interested in.
You’ll find that 99% of women don’t meet your criteria. Get in the habit of evaluating, and almost surely rejecting, everyone you meet, for all reasons that apply. Stop thinking about what kind of impression you need to make in order to convince her that you’re someone you’re not, someone you don’t want to be.This
“Do not give your strength to women, nor your ways to that which destroys kings.” -Proverbs 31:3-
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