I wanna tell you about this woman I met on Okcupid…

[MaladjustedParticipant 10]

I wanted to share my experience with this woman I recently met, she was a walking red flag, she was toxic, dysfunctional and paranoid.

I met this woman on Okcupid, I thought she was beautiful, but was almost certain I wouldn’t get a response so I decided to play the role of the jerk to get her attention. The message I sent was very silly, but it got me a response anyway. In the section about her favorite things she listed a book that I wasn’t keen on, and a few weeks before I was listening to satellite radio that explained the same author had their best friend allegedly write the majority of it and still put in their name. I wrote something to the effect,

“If they knew how to write, they wouldn’t need to ask for outside assistance. [author’s name] is just a silly git.”

Her response, “I can’t believe you. That is disrespectful!”

I replied, “Hey, you might be mad, but that message did what I intended it to do: get your attention.”

Her guns were still blazing, “I like men who are passionate, opinionated, and self-confident, not jerks.”

I didn’t hear from her again, so after a few days I wrote to her again.

“Hey, I don’t like to burn bridges, let’s pull this under the rug. I’m licking my wounded paw here.”

Her response, “Well, what did you think was going to happen with you acting the way you were?”

Unfortunately, at this point I believe I was becoming a White Knight/Mangina because I wrote that my behavior was unacceptable. Even though I did feel like a White Knight, I was also adhering to her “No-jerk policy” thinking that if I used active listening this would get her into my orbit.

So I asked if she wanted to see a concert with me, I invited her to go attend the Jesus & Mary Chain show. She explained to me that she was already going with a friend of hers, and if he didn’t go she would go with me. My response,

“Fine, but would you want to meet at the show?”

No response.

I go to the show, I enjoy it regardless and I chat it up with two middle aged inebriated guys who were just happy to be away from their wives. One asked me, “Did you show up stag? Where’s your lady?” (The guy thought I was married). Because I didn’t hear from that girl I was seeing someone else, but she didn’t know who The Jesus & Mary Chain were so she didn’t go. The guy responded, “Really? Doesn’t know them? Did you dump her ass?” I thought that was hilarious, but this other woman stopped seeing me because she didn’t like the fact that I enjoyed drinking dry vermouth martinis, she also hated how I never complimented her.

Three or four weeks later I get a message from “the girl” again, “How was the show?” she asked.

I was surprised, but I responded, “It was a good show. I’m surprised I can hear anything still. Even though you weren’t able to go the show, would you like to grab a coffee soon?”

No response. I wasn’t going to cry over spilled milk.

I had another concert coming up, to see Morrissey, I already purchased two tickets, but my friend couldn’t make it so I thought I would message that girl again. This is the part that I began becoming a white knight, and allowed her pull my face through fifteen miles of s~~~. I messaged her two weeks before the show, explaining my plans. I already had a ride service ordered to take me to and from so I can tailgate, the date of the show, and that I was inviting her. Her response had me floored…

Not only did she respond within a couple of hours, but she wrote this:

“I’m very interested, but I am unsure why you’re asking me. I am not interested in being anyone’s last resort.”

Really? I was showing interest, no response, and now this? She explained further,

“I haven’t heard from you well over a month, I was interested in you.”

I believed she did this to see my reaction, I wanted to tell her that there was no more interest left in this camper, but I also still liked her because she was a I Don’t Give A F~~~ Goth-Girl, and to paraphrase Andrew Dice Clay, I wanted to “eat the corn out her asshole, and I don’t even like corn.”

My response? I felt like a Mangina, but I wrote: “Why do you think you’re a last resort? I have been wanting to ask you, but I never heard anything from you. I wanted to take you out on a date before this, then go see the show in the future.”

She later wrote that we should get coffee so that there was no pressure… I asked her on a coffee date earlier…. so I made the plans for it, and she replied saying that it might conflict with her schedule and she would get back to me. A week goes by, No response.

On the day I scheduled I wrote, “So… Are we still on or what?” Not expecting anything from it.

“My apologies, I am usually so much better at things like this. If we re-schedule, I promise I’ll make it”.

I rationalized it. “I’m going to re-schedule, but you should be there.”

On the re-scheduled day, she texted me, “Sorry, I am going to be late. I took the bus, my sense of time isn’t usually this bad.”

The place was going to close in five minutes. So I texted back, “We can think of something. We can look for someplace that is open.”

It was late, so I drove her around and found no place open. She wanted to go home, so I just dropped her off. I still offered the ticket to her, and she told me, “What’s going to happen if I go?” I realized she was turning my nice gestures into paranoid conspiracies. “Think about it,” I said.

When I saw her, she didn’t look thrilled, and I picked her up to go see the show. The “first date” if you can call it that, was her birthday, and I had reason to believe she spent it alone because she explained she rarely left the house. What she considered fun was reading all day, or spending time with her friends, or her son. Surprise! I knew nothing else about her other than she was pansexual, and a vegetarian. She explained she had to borrow friends’ cars to get to and from, and as far as I could tell she wasn’t employed.

The irony of me taking this girl to a Morrissey show was not beyond me. She was anything but perky, and I don’t think I understood her Emo-countenance. I tried to make small talk with her, she acted lukewarm.

“Are you hungry? I can have the driver stop by somewhere on the way.”

“No.”

“…I see you have tattoos. I have a few, this one on my arm is from Charles Bukowski.”

I tried to get her to laugh, “Are you always so perky, Wednesday Addams?”

She rolled her eyes, many an eye roll would be given that day.

“I hope you’re not on Lexapro, you might need to up the dosage after this show”.

So this cycle continued, it was obvious she was just using my resources and was a being a master thief of my time. Instead of her enjoying it, she was on her phone most of the time. She never wanted to eat (I was starving, so I bought some food and offered to share–she said no, but she smiled and said she wanted a t-shirt). I continued eating my food, I was going to get it after I was finished. She had a hissy fit, by the time I got done eating and one of the opening bands took the stage so I forgot about it. I didn’t get her the shirt until the encore. They didn’t have her size, so she rolled her eyes and said she would “tear it” so it would fit.

When she wasn’t receptive I stood their next to her feeling like I had some horrible, malignant, anemic, and insidious disease. When Morrissey sang, “The World Is Full of Crashing Bores” I started to well up and stared at the floor until it was over.

<em style=”line-height: 1.5;”>”I must be one/because nobody ever turns to me to say/”Take me in your arms and love me”

<span style=”line-height: 1.5;”>On our way back to the car, everyone leaving in their cars were passing us by, I told her self-deprecatingly,</span>

“If one of those cars hit me, do you think you would miss me?”

“Yes, I would”.

“That’s good, when I’m dead and buried my tombstone will read ‘At least he tried'”.

I thought she was going to be edgy, artsy, eclectic and s~~~, but even if I slept with this woman it would probably be considered necrophilia. I dropped her off at home that night and lied that I had a great time. I practically had to wave a lighter in front of her face to see if her pupils dilate.

The next day I texted her and called her out on her bulls~~~, as well as how I felt that she didn’t appreciate anything. She replied back, “Don’t you think it’s because you never understood my sarcasm? You have been nothing but rude to me since you first messaged me, and you insult my intelligence. Thank you for everything, it was very sweet, but next time don’t insult your date. She might respond better”.

This woman was poison, she was hellbent on having a horrible time, and I had reason to believe that where she was at this point in her life, there was nothing I could do to change that. I should have crawled away at her first unacceptable behavior, but I also sucked myself back in. I wanted to share this experience with everyone on the forum. I can laugh about it now, but at the time I was a miserable sod. She murdered my self-esteem and had me walking on hot coals. But someday she will find someone that likes Mark Ryden and industrial music, and they will live happily ever after. I am crossing my fingers that she doesn’t try to find me on FB in fifteen or so years time. At least now I don’t have to buy that booster seat.

[ILiveAgainParticipant]

Goth, crazy, single mom, Okf~~~tard …. I seriously hope a lesson has been learned … and let this be a evidence to others.

On a side note …. I would have let you bang me for those tickets ?

[UntamedParticipant]

Thanks for sharing that, MaJu. I’m sure that experiance is shared by many. You ask ’em out and all of a sudden you’re not good enough, the guilt trip start and she’s a bitch. But you were good enough to get her T-shirt, weren’t you? Who paid for the tickets? Who tried to have a good time and who decided to be a big baby about the whole thing?
She wouldn’t know a good time if you drew it on her forehead. You’re too nice to these hoes and most don’t deserve it.

Don't let them Blame, Shame or Tame you!
Give 'em NOTHING, not even an answer!
#GenderSegragationNow!

[FermatParticipant 3478]

This is the game they play. Bait and switch. Women are experts of the least action principle of physics.  They will put in the absolute minimum effort in order to get the maximum effort of you the male. A brilliant strategy.  Let this be a lesson to others. Women are not worth a fraction of your consideration unless you’re horny out of your mind. If that’s the case find a new hobby.

I have discovered a truly remarkable list of reasons why women are not necessary for a happy life, but alas this margin is too small to contain it.

[RoyDalParticipant]

Lucky you that she displayed her red flags at the get go!

The really dangerous ones are those who don’t let on how toxic they are until you’ve gotten yourself committed. Like the smart fisherman, they let you swallow the bait before setting the hook. They get their fish netted and into the boat every time.

Society asks MGTOWs: Why are you not making more tax-slaves?

[JustfiguredthingsoutParticipant 23]

I always think to myself some poor bastard will end up with that bitch and will have a lifetime of suffering. This kind of s~~~ is the norm these days…Women feel the entitlement since they have a vagina. Discusting.

[MaladjustedParticipant 10]

Justfiguredthingsout wrote:

I always think to myself some poor bastard will end up with that bitch and will have a lifetime of suffering. This kind of s~~~ is the norm these days…Women feel the entitlement since they have a vagina. Discusting.

Definitely the norm. Especially with the onslaught of online dating, women can’t stand the notion that they’re being treated like options, but they do the exact same thing on their end with men. Why focus on one person when there’s thousands of potentials out there who find you attractive? It just reinforces the female need of sexual value, and in turn their entitlement. Disgusting, indeed.

[Anonymous 42]

@maladjusted my father taught me at a young age to never wait on a woman, just leave and never talk to them again. That’s perhaps the most valuable thing he taught me. I never was a fool in the rain! I don’t waste a single second with female narcissistic run around, when someone jerks my chain, they get the anchor dropped on their head!

Modern women are not compatible with”real men”, they have their manginas to play games with.

It’s weird how they always want, but never make any sacrifice. It’s like the world owes them a debt that cannot be paid.

 

[MaladjustedParticipant 10]

Anonymous wrote:

@maladjusted my father taught me at a young age to never wait on a woman, just leave and never talk to them again. That’s perhaps the most valuable thing he taught me. I never was a fool in the rain! I don’t waste a single second with female narcissistic run around, when someone jerks my chain, they get the anchor dropped on their head! Modern women are not compatible with”real men”, they have their manginas to play games with. It’s weird how they always want, but never make any sacrifice. It’s like the world owes them a debt that cannot be paid.

Sage advice! I became a mangina, which is not the norm for me, but those goth chicks make me lose my inhibition. Like kryptonite.

[BeerParticipant 11832]

Anonymous wrote:

@maladjusted my father taught me at a young age to never wait on a woman, just leave and never talk to them again. That’s perhaps the most valuable thing he taught me.

I figured this one out on my own pretty quick.  If they stand you up don’t contact them again.  If they contact you call them on it, don’t act like it was ok, its not.  If they cancel last minute and seem like they might have a legit excuse tell them no problem, give you a call when they want to reschedule…and just move along…maybe you’ll hear from them maybe you won’t, either way you aren’t going to be wasting your effort chasing them for nothing, if they were sincere and really wanted to go out they’ll have no problem calling you in a few days or whatever.

[Anonymous 11]

I don’t do online, but the same principle applies.

Any woman that wants to be with you will move Heaven and Earth to do it. The more work you do the lower your chances of success or should it be self-destruction.

[Author]

Posts