i probably could have conducted myself better

[porky ryanParticipant 18]

well i’m not sure where to start but i’ve had a first hand experience with the total lack of mens rights in regards to their children.  i got a woman pregnant that i was committed to but not married.  i’m not sure what i was thinking at the time because in truth i wasn’t.  sometimes the emotional side of the mind overtakes the logical and that’s when a man can make poor decisions because he’s really acting like a woman normally does in this particular state.  this girl was the typical social butterfly, attention whore and when she had our son that need to satisfy those urges overrode the mommy switch and still does.  i’m not trying to paint her as a raving drunk or totally out of control but by far and large she did a number of things to seriously violate my trust and make me question her as a viable partner in raising our child together.  i was the only working to support our household while watching the child half the time so that she could attend college classes.  she would stay out late or not come home at all.  i would let her take my car on condition that she could drive it home that night and she would leave me and the baby without transportation because she did not come back.  i would like to say that i have a certain degree of self control and a cool head but this woman liked to push my buttons all to well.  our fights were volatile sometimes.  once in the middle of one when she was drunk she punched me while i was holding our 7 month old son.  clearly many of you could read this and say i would have moved on long before that but i am and was young at the time and influenced in a way that made me want to try to stay.  i was raised by a man that i would say is strong and honorable but by definition is a social conservative blue pill guy because he stayed in his marriage for his kids. that’s the influence i had going into this and thats what i thought at the time.  i felt like i was carrying the whole burden of maintaining our household and being the consistent one who always had our childs best interest in mind. although most of the time she did play the role of mother as soon as something exciting enough came her way she would be totally unaccountable and untrustworthy to do what was right. things really escalated. eventually she declared to me that we were no longer together but would continue living together.  i was helping a friend at a local produce farm at the time and she told me that i should move there but continue to pay for her to live at our home. one time she came home drunk and had sex with me just to wake up the next day and claim that it was a mistake and she still felt the same.  i was at my breaking point as this state of our status in her mind had gone on for about a month.  we had another explosive fight.  i lost it, i told her it was over, i was leaving her, she could support herself and i would comeback the next day to get my stuff. i had just put my son down to sleep for the night after having spent all day with him at the farm.  she ran upstairs and grabbed him as if i was some sort of threat to the most precious thing in my life.  i spitefully folded our labtop in half to break it.  she was obsessed with facebook to the point of neglecting all else and i had dreamed of this action again and again. she ran outside with our son to the neighbors of our duplex acting totally hysterical.  i verbally threatened her (like a fool) and got in my car and left.  the next day i came back to grab some clothes before i went to work. she told me i better call the police.  within minutes the state troopers were there and i was under arrest. what i did not know is that she brought the computer in along with a gun that i owned that was not in anyway involved at the time or any prior incident to the state police. she claimed that the computer was hers and that it cost more than what i actually paid for the thing.  the gun is an ak47 with some cool attachments with which i had some large capacity mags.  it was manufactured before 1994 so in my state it was grandfathered in as being legal to own.  the state police were so hungry to make a weapons arrest because of the current gun control political climate at the time that they forwent proper investigative procedure by not having their weapons investigator look at it and put forth two weapons charges on my arrest that were totally unfounded. in the end i was charged with a felony for breaking the computer because she lied about how much it cost, 2 felonies for weapons charges and a harassment charge for threatening her.  i was immediately removed from the home that i established and issued a restraining order which also prevented me from seeing my son because she had possession of him and i could communicate to make arrangements to see him.  she filed for full custody the next day. in  some counties in new york state when a crime is committed in a family household and a petition for custody is filed in response to this it is placed in a special court called integrated domestic violence court.  one judge presides over both the family court and criminal court hearings and the outcome of the family court hearing is based on the criminal. ofcourse the family court hearing dates are pushed through immediately before the criminal court is even addressed.  i could only afford a lawyer for my criminal charges because they consider the family court and supreme court hearings to be two separate cases.  she was of course appointed one for free because she had no income.  the judge immediately removed my rights to custody on the first hearing and they cannot be restored unless i go into family court trial.  in regards to the criminal charges, the weapons charges and harassment were thrown out.  when two people live in the same household anyone who is aloud to freely use anothers property also retains ownership of that item.  so even if i could prove that i bought the computer she still had rights to it.  because she lied about the value of the thing and it started out as a felony i was forced to take a plea bargain to knock it down to a misdemeanor or risk going to trial and lose and end up in prison.  because i lost my temper with a woman, broke a piece of my own property within the confines of my own home and owned a gun that was perfectly legal i lost all rights except visitation with my child, was sentenced to three years probation and payed and am paying thousands of dollars in lawyer, court and probation supervision fees.  this was about 2 years ago.  the bitch doesn’t even want to be fully responsible for him.  i didn’t see my son for about 2 months but after contacting her mother and eventually her once the court would allow it i started to have him half the time or more almost immediately after that initial period of not seeing him.  in a totally untypical move she even agreed to give me my rights back after some time had passed.  the judge is a total sadist who only looks to punish in the most severe way rather than recognize things that could be forgiven or even rewarded. i petitioned to have the custody ordered modified and he denied it even though myself, her and the child advocate (lawyer) agreed on the change.  so once again because i have a history of domestic violence (breaking my own computer) and owning a gun that was legal to own i am an unfit parent to have equal legal rights to my child even though i have him more of the time and put forth more resources to.  to add more into the mix i committed to another woman who i now have a child with thinking NAWALT and even though she is not nearly as bad I now realize AWALT but that is a totally different story.

[ILiveAgainParticipant]

All that has gone before matters not one jot. All you have know and been through stops here and NOW.

This is your new world. One of peace, self worth and progress.

The past is only a lesson. Learn and move on. You are wiser now then anytime in your life. With that knowledge comes strength.

Move forward my friend. The sun shines for you now. Be strong, confident, independent ……. be a real true to self man ☺

[RoyDalParticipant]

ILiveAgain wrote:

All that has gone before matters not one jot. All you have know and been through stops here and NOW.

This is your new world. One of peace, self worth and progress.

The past is only a lesson. Learn and move on. You are wiser now then anytime in your life. With that knowledge comes strength.

Move forward my friend. The sun shines for you now. Be strong, confident, independent ……. be a real true to self man ☺

@porky ryan, These are wise words. I can’t do better for you than to repeat them.

Society asks MGTOWs: Why are you not making more tax-slaves?

[experiencedParticipant]

Thank you for reliving your pain for everyone’s benefit. By writing this post, you’ll more than likely open up the eyes of young men who would otherwise be slaughtered in the future.  Someone posted months ago how when judges eff over guys like you with regard to children and child support, they basically get matching federal gov’t funding or something of that sort. This probably ties in with the ‘not taking away the negative’ attitude of the asshole excuse me I mean judge.

Your insights will be looked forward to.     And as far as “I probably………….” don’t beat yourself up. She’s lucky that…  ….. …. .. . ……..  …. .     ………  …

 

"It seems like there's times a body gets struck down so low, there ain't a power on earth that can ever bring him up again. Seems like something inside dies so he don't even want to get up again. But he does."

[porky ryanParticipant 18]

this judge is notorious for being the most hardcore one in the entire county system, here’s a fine example of the type of authority he believes he should have over the average person who goes before him.
timothy lawliss of clinton county
this guy threw me in jail after all this happened to me because i owed 30 dollars on my court fee payment for that month which had not ended yet. no where in the order of payment was there any language that said each payment should be made within a 30 day business period “month” from the day i was sentenced. it only said that from the day that i was sentenced and on i would make a payment each month until it was payed off.  how can you throw someone in jail and risk their job they need to pay you off with for a mere 30 dollars.

[Author]

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