I need to delay signing of the Separation Agreement, any suggestions?

[Point Of No ReturnParticipant 4074]

I need to delay signing of the Separation Agreement (the last agreement before the whole thing goes to the judge for a judgement), any suggestions?
My ex’s lawyer is pushing my lawyer, who is in turn pushing me to get the final Separation Agreement together and signed. However, the status quo is to my advantage right now, and I want to delay putting together the final Separation Agreement for as long as possible.

Know when it is your duty to give them zero explanations for your actions.

[Point Of No ReturnParticipant 4074]

Do any of you have suggestions to help me delay this as much as I can?

Know when it is your duty to give them zero explanations for your actions.

[Two Time WinnerParticipant 1090]

Your attorney works for you. Tell him you are not ready to sign and why. He should know a way to delay things.

TTW

I ain't got a wife to spend my money, I have to do that all by myself.

[Point Of No ReturnParticipant 4074]

Two Time Winner wrote:

Your attorney works for you. Tell him you are not ready to sign and why. He should know a way to delay things.

TTW

I should add that my legal costs are subsidised by the Legal Aid Bureau. I wonder if that could have something to do with it.

Know when it is your duty to give them zero explanations for your actions.

[CoolbreezeParticipant 442]

I would add that if you think you’ve got advantage then delaying may not be the best move? Don’t know enough about your situation to give any sort of advice. My process was like ripping duct tape off your skin; I wanted it done and knew there was going to be pain so I said rip this motherf~~~er off me.

[Point Of No ReturnParticipant 4074]

One of the biggest advantages right now, to keeping the status quo, is that I don’t have to pay support, I can put that money in a provisional account. One way to kill a tumour is to starve it of its sustenance.

Know when it is your duty to give them zero explanations for your actions.

[Anonymous 7]

Don’t sign if you don’t want to. What are they gonna do, put a gun to your head?

Years ago I foolishly shared my stand on religion with co-workers.
The supervisor did not agree so he went gunning for me.
He ‘wrote me up’ for trivial s~~~ and asked me to sign it.
I told him no.

No is a powerful word.
Just this morning a female was looking for my resources (time and ability). I told her no.

[Point Of No ReturnParticipant 4074]

I think NO must belong to the same family as NFG. They seem to wear the same colours.

Know when it is your duty to give them zero explanations for your actions.

[CoolbreezeParticipant 442]

I can’t say I blame you for putting it off. Anything less than 50% legal and physical custody just leaves you and the kids disadvantaged. I’d like to know of one case in which child support has actually helped a family.

[TaxGuyParticipant]

Point Of No Return wrote:

One of the biggest advantages right now, to keeping the status quo, is that I don’t have to pay support, I can put that money in a provisional account. One way to kill a tumour is to starve it of its sustenance.

Just my personal opinion, so take it for what it’s worth.

If THAT is your big advantage, sign the agreement. You’re talking about a few hundred dollars a month. I would think that anything you save right now would be 50% hers in the final divorce. So you’re most likely only saving half of what you think you are. Plus, since you are still married to her, she can still legally bind you to stupid mistakes. What if she goes out and gets a new credit card and charges it to the limit? You could be on the hook for half of the debt.

The sooner you are legally separated the better. That was my biggest motivation with my ex, to gets our separate lives legally separated from each other.

There’s a huge relief when you know that your ex can’t make any decisions that have a personal legal affect on you. It’s not worth the money.

Something to consider…….

Order the good wine

[53ClicksUpParticipant 1345]

Make sure that the visitation and child custody arrangement is palatable to endure for how ever many years it will take for your kids to reach the age of 18. That’s a very long time if they are small children.

[NerdTunnelerParticipant]

When everything is favorable to you then sign. Delaying the inevitable perhaps in the hope of reconciling or revenge is not going to be good for you. It is time to start healing yourself instead of wallowing in the misery of her attention.

Stop making excuses and move on. If she gets p~~~ed more she can sue you for back payments and such which will delay your healing much longer…

It is your call, we dont know much of the situation but I am reading that you still want to be connected to her even negatively for the sake of being present her life however negative…Good luck brother and start healing…

I stand with feet apart and let my balls hang free...Manginas dont have balls...See how they stand and sit at the whim of their masters...

[bstoffParticipant 4885]

Don’t let your attorney push you into anything you don’t want to do.
If they are doing that, then they aren’t working in your interest.

You can ask your lawyer to go over your advantages and disadvantages of moving quickly.
If he doesn’t sound like he is being honest and candid with you, say so.
It is his job and legal responsibility to work FOR YOU and only you.

[Point Of No ReturnParticipant 4074]

One other reason I’m waiting is because I suppose I would need to prove to the lawyers or court that I can accommodate my two sons with normal living conditions and this means finding a bigger place and signing a new lease. I’m looking for a little more time to become more financially ready for that change.

Know when it is your duty to give them zero explanations for your actions.

[narwhalParticipant]

Your last reason sounds like a good one. Why do you need to prove that? Is that common for your state/country or is your ex trying to prove that you aren’t capable of custody of the kids.

As for ways to not sign, why do you need a reason for the delay. Obviously, you can just not sign if you don’t want to. If you don’t sign without reason do you forfeit something? Are you trying to preserve some sort of positive relations with the ex?

Ok. Then do it.

[FrostByteParticipant 19005]

Point Of No Return wrote:

One other reason I’m waiting is because I suppose I would need to prove to the lawyers or court that I can accommodate my two sons with normal living conditions and this means finding a bigger place and signing a new lease. I’m looking for a little more time to become more financially ready for that change.

TaxGuy wrote:

Plus, since you are still married to her, she can still legally bind you to stupid mistakes. What if she goes out and gets a new credit card and charges it to the limit? You could be on the hook for half of the debt.

You got pros and cons. Write them all down and compare. Consider your risk for waiting and weigh against the potential gains.
I never met a wife that couldn’t step on every sand castle I built and set me back 5 years for every attempt I made to better our lives.

If you rescue a damsel in distress, all you will get is a distressed damsel.

[Point Of No ReturnParticipant 4074]

In my jurisdiction I have to prove that I can accommodate my kids reasonably. I currently live in a place meant for one. So far my ex has not contested anything, so it’s more between me and the judge’s expectations for the kids. I still have yet to find out what the consequences are for delaying. My ex’s lawyer wants to conclude the whole matter. My ex has gone hypergamous and wants to marry Cpt. Saveahoe asap.

Know when it is your duty to give them zero explanations for your actions.

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