I Hope My Son Will Read This One Day

[NoMoreParticipant 1233]

Good morning gentlemen. I’ve been lurking for a few months, but recently registered an account and can give my story. It will be a shortened version without all of the hilarious details as I’m still going through the process. When all is said and done in around a year or so, I’ll spell it out as a National Lampoon’s divorce movie.

I’m in my 30’s and a physician. We met towards the end of my training and married after I had finished. Dodged a bullet with that. She was sweet, caring, and had a good sense of humor. She also worked in the medical field, so I figured she’d understand my demanding work schedule.

Unfortunately, I ignored the warning signs; fights with her siblings, petty arguments with my family, and warnings from my friends. Shortly after we married, she began hating my family. They were too involved and they needed to mind their own business. My friends were taking up too much of my time.

She talked me into buying a house bigger than I wanted, because we were going to fill it with kids. Well, we struggled to finally get pregnant and had our son. Thus began the downward spiral. My busy schedule meant I was working when normal husbands were home. I was in the hospital at odd hours. She came to resent that I wasn’t able to share 50% of the parenting. One day, I overheard her saying some nasty remarks about me to our infant son.

I withdrew from her to avoid the toxic atmosphere she carried around her and focused my energies on my son. We started marriage counseling. It still amuses me to see the looks on our counsellor’s face when I relate to him the latest thing she said or did. Some of the things she said and did were terrible and insane. I stuck with it for the sake of my son, but eventually realized I didn’t want him to grow up thinking this was what marriage was.

After a rather large argument, she said she wanted a separation. She was going to move back and go to school. She told me she was never coming back after she left and it was up to me to decide what I would do. For weeks I thought about this. We have a nice house. I have a great job. There are great schools. It’s a nice city. I didn’t think moving was going to solve our issues, but just make me more miserable. I told her I wanted a divorce.

Good lord, the fireworks that brought about. She was going to take me to the bank and take everything from me. But, I’d already met with a lawyer and put my finances in order. We sent off our proposals to the opposing lawyers and jaw dropping is how I’d describe hers. Talking with my lawyer and consulting online legal resources confirmed to me that she thought she was living on “Real Housewives” and divorcing a doctor was going to yield a golden parachute.

My offer was and stands at half of everything. She wants 4 times that and you can scratch your heads about that. My state’s laws and the short duration of the marriage preclude alimony and touching my retirement.

So, I’m just sitting here, hopeful of a fair settlement and watching the world go by. The funny thing is, I’d only heard of this site because she bitterly asked me during an argument if I was going to go become a MGTOW. I’d never heard of it, so I looked it up. Funny how things work out.

My advice, though I’m not a lawyer,
1. Get an attorney if you even smell a separation. The initial meeting is typically free. You only have to pay if you retain their services. Bonus, after you meet with them, even if you don’t retain them, your spouse cannot meet with them or their partners. It was suggested, but I didn’t do it, to meet with the top 10 or so divorce attorneys for free, and now your spouse can’t talk to them.

2. Meet with a few attorneys and do some online research. Follow your attorney’s advice initially. Also, check that advice against your internal moral compass. If it sounds like something you wouldn’t want your spouse to do to you, then you likely don’t want to do it to her.

3. Protect yourself. You have a cell phone. Whenever you are around her, have the damn thing recording. Android is easier to record phone calls than iPhone is. Check your local laws. Make voice notes on your phone often so you have vivid recordings of events and situations and aren’t forced to recall details months later.

4. Protect yourself. You will need food and shelter. For that, you need money. Immediately before filling divorce, you need to open your own checking account. After you file divorce, you can’t meddle with the financials. Transfer some amount less than half the balance into the account. The money you leave behind is hers. This is so she cannot drain the account and leave you penniless until the next paycheck.

5. Protect yourself. Your next paycheck needs to be deposited into your sole account. If needed, change the direct deposit to the new account. When you open a new account, the bank should give you a slip specifically for this. You cannot do this after you file for divorce.

6. Your kids. Spend as much time with them as you can. She will be keeping tally of every missed bedtime and doctors appointment. They need their dad and you love them. However, do not hesitate to remove yourself from a toxic situation if she starts creating a hostile environment. Just document it in your voice notes on your phone or in a journal.

7. Behave yourself. You’re upset and need to let off some steam. Spend the weekend at a buddy’s or your cousin’s house. Enjoy yourself, light a bonfire, get hammered, put some lead on paper, but don’t break the law. Avoid the bars, strip clubs, etc. Don’t put yourself into any situation that would reflect badly on you. DUI’s, public intoxication, drugs, solicitation, you’re only hurting yourself.

8. Be the Good Actor. If she is the stay at home wife/mom, you cannot deprive her of all support. When you separated the money, she has to have enough to pay the mortgage, bills, daycare, etc, unless you are going to do that yourself. Know and behave such that you can stand before the judge and tell them that you behaved in good faith. Regardless of the outcome of that, years later, you can look your children in the eye and state the same. Your spouse may attempt to poison your children against you, but some day, you can show them the text messages and recorded conversations that demonstrate you did everything you could to act in their best interest.

Sorry for the long post. Hope y’all enjoy. I’ll fill in the hilarious details when this journey is over.

A co-worker recently told me, "If you want to see who someone really is, divorce them." I have found out how true this is. When your wife drops the façade of being the caring partner, you will witness all of the greed, hate, and spite that she has masked. It is truly breathtaking!

[Duke TogoParticipant 2664]

Welcome. Sounds like you are going to get out of this one without surprises considering all the preparation you have done. All the best to you.

[bladeParticipant]

Welcome bro . Don’t go near pussy again . Its some dangerous s~~~ bro . Its a f~~~in sniper rifle thats what pussy is . Ya safe here bro . That plantation s~~~ they can keep .

VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV

THE PLANTATION HAS NOW TURNED INTO THE KILLING FIELDS . WOMAN ARE NOW ROLLING CAMBODIAN STYLE .

[bladeParticipant]

Keep humor bro it is good medicine .

THE PLANTATION HAS NOW TURNED INTO THE KILLING FIELDS . WOMAN ARE NOW ROLLING CAMBODIAN STYLE .

[ABParticipant 762]

NoMore wrote:

Get an attorney if you even smell a separation. The initial meeting is typically free. You only have to pay if you retain their services. Bonus, after you meet with them, even if you don’t retain them, your spouse cannot meet with them or their partners. It was suggested, but I didn’t do it, to meet with the top 10 or so divorce attorneys for free, and now your spouse can’t talk to them.

That is absolute gold if it’s true!

NoMore wrote:

Protect yourself. You have a cell phone. Whenever you are around her, have the damn thing recording. Android is easier to record phone calls than iPhone is. Check your local laws. Make voice notes on your phone often so you have vivid recordings of events and situations and aren’t forced to recall details months later.

I’ve done this myself. Start it recording, pocket it, pray you don’t accidently stop it recording whilst in your pocket. I actually used to video record the exchange of our child – whenever I would pick up/drop off my kid, the phone would be in my chest pocket, camera facing outwards, recording the entire duration without her knowledge. It was purely “covering my own back” because we all know how trustworthy a womans word is…

NoMore wrote:

Avoid the bars, strip clubs, etc. Don’t put yourself into any situation that would reflect badly on you. DUI’s, public intoxication, drugs, solicitation, you’re only hurting yourself.

I can relate, with this I buried myself in the gym – it gave me a productive environment to release any aggression without any negative connotation to damage my reputation to the court system.

I feel your pain brother, but I applaud your knowledge and efforts.

You are doing everything you can to safeguard yourself, and your step by step guide seems pretty damn watertight. I found during my court battle with my ex over child access, that basically she couldn’t be bothered to put in half the effort that I did; it showed, I was organised, informed and went in there already knowing how it would play out. She turned up looking dumb and came out confused with how the court system that favoured women could’ve let her down so badly. It’s all in the preparation. And to reiterate, it’s always the same point: It’s not what you know, it’s what you can prove in court.

Stay strong brother, I hope you come out of this financially and emotionally stable, ready to move on in your own way to better days. Hopefully soon we can all raise a glass to your success story.

No-one's yet explained to me exactly what's so great // About slaving fifty years away on something that you hate // About meekly shuffling down the path of mediocrity // Well if that's your road then take it, but it's not the road for me.

[Anonymous 42]

NoMore wrote:

The funny thing is, I’d only heard of this site because she bitterly asked me during an argument if I was going to go become a MGTOW. I’d never heard of it, so I looked it up. Funny how things work out.

Things “always” work out! Ebb’n’flow!

I have a simpler list!

The Peter Pan list!

1. Never get married.

2. Never cohabit.

3. Go your own way, do your own thing, and never look back!

P.S. you should seek an appointment with every attorney in YOUR STATE! Perhaps have some kind of shutout. I NEVER PLAY NICE IN A FIGHT!

[NoMoreParticipant 1233]

I’m hoping to get out well. I just have to weather the s~~~ storm until then.

A co-worker recently told me, "If you want to see who someone really is, divorce them." I have found out how true this is. When your wife drops the façade of being the caring partner, you will witness all of the greed, hate, and spite that she has masked. It is truly breathtaking!

[Anonymous 18]

Physicians have a tendency to attract particular breed of parasites.

Perhaps it’s just money.

Your wife does sound like a piece of work.

Welcome and best wishes in the journey ahead.

And thanks to your wife for showing you the path of MGTOW. Pat her back for that.

[Jan SobieskiParticipant 28791]

The funny thing is, I’d only heard of this site because she bitterly asked me during an argument if I was going to go become a MGTOW.

Then we are out of the bag

Love is just alimony waiting to happen. Visit mgtow.com.

[NoMoreParticipant 1233]

Anonymous wrote:

Physicians have a tendency to attract particular breed of parasites.

Perhaps it’s just money.

Your wife does sound like a piece of work.

Welcome and best wishes in the journey ahead.

And thanks to your wife for showing you the path of MGTOW. Pat her back for that.

Unfortunately, we got married after I’d finished training. I put in all the blood, sweat, and tears before she came along.

A co-worker recently told me, "If you want to see who someone really is, divorce them." I have found out how true this is. When your wife drops the façade of being the caring partner, you will witness all of the greed, hate, and spite that she has masked. It is truly breathtaking!

[NoMoreParticipant 1233]

Jan Sobieski wrote:

The funny thing is, I’d only heard of this site because she bitterly asked me during an argument if I was going to go become a MGTOW.

Then we are out of the bag

It was an off the cuff remark that I didn’t really respond to. She mentioned it again later. I asked her what she was talking about and she gave the full title. So, I looked it up and here I am.

A co-worker recently told me, "If you want to see who someone really is, divorce them." I have found out how true this is. When your wife drops the façade of being the caring partner, you will witness all of the greed, hate, and spite that she has masked. It is truly breathtaking!

[Mr. SpockParticipant 10910]

Welcome sir. Your advice is spot on. I wish you well in your outcome. Stay strong.

Feminism isn't about equality with men, it's about leverage over men.

[DorkShitParticipant 4353]

Welcome brother. You speak with a voice of reason.

Peace brothers

[AntipathyParticipant 4901]

welcome aboard NoMore.

Good to see a physician prescribe the red-pill.

Best of luck to you in your situation, avoid these women as though they have radioactive isotopes in their pants.

[Jan SobieskiParticipant 28791]

What I meant was that if an average woman knows about mgtow, everyone does

Love is just alimony waiting to happen. Visit mgtow.com.

[NoMoreParticipant 1233]

Jan Sobieski wrote:

What I meant was that if an average woman knows about mgtow, everyone does

She probably heard about it on some reality divorce blog. She’s always been a fan of those crap-tastic reality shows.

A co-worker recently told me, "If you want to see who someone really is, divorce them." I have found out how true this is. When your wife drops the façade of being the caring partner, you will witness all of the greed, hate, and spite that she has masked. It is truly breathtaking!

[BlacqueJacqueShellacqueParticipant 6890]

Welcome NoMore (KnowMore)!

Physician heal thyself. Heal thyself with MGTOW. It’s a pleasure to have you here.

[bstoffParticipant 4863]

A word of advice, No More.
If she is the one who knew about MGTOW before you, you can surely bet she is lurking the forums here and elsewhere. Be careful about what you reveal.
If she knows MGTOW, she may be a feminist with teams of helpers watching your every move. Be careful who you speak in front of and whom you choose to trust.

[ABParticipant 762]

On other forums I’ve been a member of, there was an option at Administrator level to “hide forums from public viewing” meaning that only registered members could “lurk”.

Perhaps this is worth considering KM?

No-one's yet explained to me exactly what's so great // About slaving fifty years away on something that you hate // About meekly shuffling down the path of mediocrity // Well if that's your road then take it, but it's not the road for me.

[Enjoy The DeclineParticipant 1719]

bstoff wrote:

A word of advice, No More.
If she is the one who knew about MGTOW before you, you can surely bet she is lurking the forums here and elsewhere. Be careful about what you reveal.
If she knows MGTOW, she may be a feminist with teams of helpers watching your every move. Be careful who you speak in front of and whom you choose to trust.

THIS!!

"Question everything" - Albert Einstein

[Author]

Posts