I dream of getting to NFG…

[inneedoftruthParticipant 94]

Some of you might have read my introduction, quick recap, I raise my wife’s 2 kids from a previous marriage and our two kids for years (while also working crappy part time jobs to help make ends meet) so she can get her doctorate and become a successful Dr.who owns her own practice. After 14 years, we’ve finally reached the dream. I’m running her private practice, we’re starting to make real money……she wants a divorce. Is f~~~ing a friend of mine. They are now in a relationship (though they deny it to the kids and only a few close friends of theirs know, mom doesn’t want to look like the bad person to the kids, so she still tells them they are just friends, waiting to give them time till she deems them ready and getting over the shock of the divorce before she drops the bomb dad’s old friend and her are actually together)

And the divorce is turning ugly. And as the highly trained vindictive c~~~ of a psychologist she is, she keeps finding ways to rub my face in it.

Just a few examples.
Kid tells me “Sunday mom brought home the most amazing tacos I’ve ever had, it’s from this place that sells chineese food and tacos. She said to tell you have to try it!” My wife and mine sunday morning tradition was to go to brunch at a local hole in the wall mexican restaurant, we’d pick a new one every week. Right before this all went down my “friend” was raving about that chineese/taco place and insisting we all go there and try it. Wife wanted to let me know she is carrying on her sunday tradition with him now. And she wanted my son to unwittingly hurt me with the news.

Drop the kids off to our marital house a couple mornings ago before school. Her/my old garage door is wide open. She never leaves it open. Wait, oh I see, she has her car parked in the cramped, third stall part of the garage. She wanted to let me know he now parks in my old spot.

Kid has a recital for school last night. I can’t go because wife put a bulls~~~, completely false f~~~ing protection order on me to force me out of our home so she can be free to be with him. Wife went last week to have it dropped, but she (as a trained psychologist, who writes reports for court cases, probation, child abuse, etc.etc.) wrote such a convincing report about me, the judge denies the dismissal request saying if all she said about me was true, she can’t in good conscious dismiss it already.Wants to set a hearing up to discuss it with us both.

Wife tells me she will record it for me.. Sends me the video, all good, last ten seconds, recital is ending, she says “that was cute!” I hear my “friend” respond, “yeah, that was very cool!”…end of video…

Oh man, I can’t wait to stop giving a F~~~!!!! I hate myself that I still let her f~~~ing mind games f~~~ me up! I need this to be over inside me so I can go MGTOW and actually enjoy the rest of my f~~~ing life.. F~~~!

[Anonymous 54]

I have learned to not see them as individuals. Awalt and all that. Your x could be my ex. They are all the same. You are forced to deal with one of them. Thats just your current situation.Personalize it less.

They can all do Evil things. The more she does, the less you should see her as an individual.
No f~~~s given.

[FrostByteParticipant 19005]

Your in a cycle. She wants to control your life. She will use the kids and whatever to hurt you. If you feel bad she is winning and will do it more.

Reverse the cycle on her. Even if you have to fake it a first.

1. Realize the more you are NFG the more she loses control.
2. The more control she loses the harder she tries to hurt you.
3. The harder she tries the more opportunity she gives you to send her more NFGs.

Act Successful, be happy, love your freedom, and you will start winning the game. The NFG part will come as a natural thing.

Be so busy having a great life you forget she exists.

If you rescue a damsel in distress, all you will get is a distressed damsel.

[FrostByteParticipant 19005]

Oh and welcome to the forum.

If you rescue a damsel in distress, all you will get is a distressed damsel.

[Anonymous 13]

She could be trying to break you, because she knows you could be entitled to a fair chunk of the business, house etc.
I wish I could offer more advice beyond keep it together and go for everything you can. The moment you lose it or do anything stupid she wins. It’s total s~~~ I know.
Good luck.

[TaxGuyParticipant]

The only advice I can give you is that, if you ignore all of that crap (at least don’t let her know it gets to you), it will eventually stop. It’s only fun for her if you show her that it hurts. So don’t show her.

Also, don’t overlook the fact that the judge already has an issue with her. That was a royal f~~~ up on her part, especially since she writes this stuff as her job. Seriously, she just put her job in jeopardy. If that judge starts thinking that she lied about her divorce, he will think that she lies about them all. He already knows something doesn’t look right. Don’t forget that angle. I’m not saying do anything with that little nugget of information, but don’t forget it. It may serve you well in the future.

Lying almost always has a way of coming back and biting you in the ass.

Order the good wine

[Clint EastwoodParticipant 323]

My deepest sympathies and understanding, the world is bursting with illogical crazy bitches.

What I’ve learnt on my topsy turvy journey, is that you will only be banging your head against a wall if you try to ignore her powers, or forget about her, or try to go MGTOW, in one go.

Try a little bit at a time. Next time she does or says something that makes you want to put your fist through the garage door, just pause for a second before you react. Try to think of something totally unconnected, like a cup of coffee, or your favourite band etc.

That brief moment will allow you to meet the rush of emotions and head them off before they take hold.

Over time, you’ll be applying this to every ‘moment’ without thinking about it, and it will feel good.

Another trick, is that if you are caught in a situation with her and you can’t walk away (the best option), look at her and imagine she looks like something or someone else entirely – a Gremlin, Mickey Mouse, a pile of horse s~~~, anything you find hilarious or amusing. This will completely change your reaction.

If she uses your son as a weapon and he says for example, about the taco’s, just say “that’s nice, were they tasty”, or something like that. Play along with everything. Act the idiot.

Sorry if I’m teaching you to suck eggs, but these tricks have saved me from a lot of anxiety and really threw the wife off course. She thought she could play me like a harp, but when I started reacting entirely differently to her controlling efforts, she stopped doing it.

Finally, stay the course. Her and her lawyers will try their best to wear you down, to make you think there’s no hope and that you’ll just f~~~ off. Time will pass quickly and each day, you’ll move a step closer to your goal.

It will end. 🙂

Stay vigilant. They're everywhere.

[StargazerParticipant 12505]

1) You’re not going to get her back.
2) You’re not going to get the time and effort you spent back either.
3) She is going to do everything in her power to hurt you as long and hard as she can.
4) She will turn your own children against you.
5) It’s going to get a lot worse before it gets better.

These are IMMUTABLE truths. As real and final as a nuclear explosion. Everything is f~~~ed and it’s going to stay that way. This is your new life.

Now… you can choose to resist or you can choose to accept. That is the only power you have… but it’s stronger than anything she can do to you. You simply accept the truth and make your own way through it.

Get your new, modest place. Go to work, enjoy your freedom and the peace and quiet when you can. And every time you see some s~~~ she’s pulling, you just smile and say “yep” and go on about your business.

The thing that hurts you is hanging onto the idea that it could or should have been different. It wasn’t, it isn’t and it could not have been so let it go and move forward to what’s next. And it sure doesn’t hurt to start working on some hobbies or do the things you always wanted to do that she wouldn’t allow or find someone young and new to play with.

Just don’t talk about your wife, your kid or your divorce with anyone. That’s your s~~~ to bear. Keep it to yourself and focus on good things and the f~~~s will pass.

[Anonymous 13]

Stargazer wrote:

1) You’re not going to get her back.
2) You’re not going to get the time and effort you spent back either.
3) She is going to do everything in her power to hurt you as long and hard as she can.
4) She will turn your own children against you.
5) It’s going to get a lot worse before it gets better.

These are IMMUTABLE truths. As real and final as a nuclear explosion. Everything is f~~~ed and it’s going to stay that way. This is your new life.

Now… you can choose to resist or you can choose to accept. That is the only power you have… but it’s stronger than anything she can do to you. You simply accept the truth and make your own way through it.

Get your new, modest place. Go to work, enjoy your freedom and the peace and quiet when you can. And every time you see some s~~~ she’s pulling, you just smile and say “yep” and go on about your business.

The thing that hurts you is hanging onto the idea that it could or should have been different. It wasn’t, it isn’t and it could not have been so let it go and move forward to what’s next. And it sure doesn’t hurt to start working on some hobbies or do the things you always wanted to do that she wouldn’t allow or find someone young and new to play with.

Just don’t talk about your wife, your kid or your divorce with anyone. That’s your s~~~ to bear. Keep it to yourself and focus on good things and the f~~~s will pass.

^^^
That’s some of the best advice I’ve seen, you can’t go far wrong if you can follow that.

[Clint EastwoodParticipant 323]

Stargazer wrote:

1) You’re not going to get her back.
2) You’re not going to get the time and effort you spent back either.
3) She is going to do everything in her power to hurt you as long and hard as she can.
4) She will turn your own children against you.
5) It’s going to get a lot worse before it gets better.

These are IMMUTABLE truths. As real and final as a nuclear explosion. Everything is f~~~ed and it’s going to stay that way. This is your new life.

Now… you can choose to resist or you can choose to accept. That is the only power you have… but it’s stronger than anything she can do to you. You simply accept the truth and make your own way through it.

Get your new, modest place. Go to work, enjoy your freedom and the peace and quiet when you can. And every time you see some s~~~ she’s pulling, you just smile and say “yep” and go on about your business.

The thing that hurts you is hanging onto the idea that it could or should have been different. It wasn’t, it isn’t and it could not have been so let it go and move forward to what’s next. And it sure doesn’t hurt to start working on some hobbies or do the things you always wanted to do that she wouldn’t allow or find someone young and new to play with.

Just don’t talk about your wife, your kid or your divorce with anyone. That’s your s~~~ to bear. Keep it to yourself and focus on good things and the f~~~s will pass.

Yep, it only hurts if you still care. The relationship is in the past. Look towards and work for a better future. Then you won’t care about the past.

Stay vigilant. They're everywhere.

[revistaParticipant 232]

So much good advice as always.i was where you are now and it was tough.it gets easier and you deal with it better.just concentrate on being a good dad to your kids.they will appreciate the calmness and drama free enviroment..i had 2 bits of advice off my friends when i was in a dark place…”you cant control what other people say or do to you,you can only control how you react to it” and “dont think about what shes doing cos shes not worrying bout you”.simple things a buddy says to you but it helped me..youve gota become hardened to it,eventually you will just give all the love to your kids and not give a f~~~ about anything else.drama free and peace and quiet,its ace.all the best brother.

[OgreParticipant 5863]

You got a raw deal welcome to the club.

The ZFG attitude isn’t a right, it is hard fought. Chad’s vehicle in your spot in the garage is temporary, it’s just like her make up. He is being used, just like you had been.

Once you understand that a!l of the inadequacies are hers, your zen will come.

I do understand that right now it is torturing yours, but once you shift your focus to yourself her BS will fall away.

Be the man that yyou want to be and love your kids, her s~~~ tests on you are just designed to hurt. Be above it all and realize that when all is said and done you can be free of her toxic influence. zFG comes from understanding that you were accepting a route through life that only helped her.

Find your passion, and pursue it. The vehicle parked in your old spot will change many times. Be your best you.

I failed to realize in my youth that I was the prize. I was going to work. I was going to earn. Little did I realize that due to feminism, that no longer meant I had to share. Road soon, Desert after.

[AkhilleusParticipant 2486]

Me personally you have to go thru some hard times she is doing this on purpose driving the pain eventually the pain will go away and you will feel nothing. It’s gonna be hard but time changes everything, it will get worse before it gets better but after you will emerge red pill ragey but stronger inside. Reason why it hurts so much is your feelings were true and honorable and obviously the c~~~ was just lying from the start, but take heart brother what she did to you she will do to him. Best of luck keep your head up bro your not alone.

Aloha means family you don't leave family behind. Who will be the next Draconarius for MGTOW? MGTOW = brothers = acceptance = belonging

[Anonymous 54]

She has unleashed phycological warfare on you. Obviously she will be good at it.Take control by your reaction to it. Never show your emotions. Unless its for intentional disimformation.Keep her off balance.
Change something about yourself. Hair, cloths, shoes. Lean against your car all casual, pretend your texting or calling some chic and flirting (out of ear shot) Stand ridged, on the phone like you were talking to a Man about a problem. Point toward the house. 2 can play this game.

[JVBParticipant]

Feel for you brother. Please don’t hate yourself. You are going through an extremely s~~~ time. She is trying to hurt you and easier said than done you must not let it get to you. I wish you luck and this will end.

Peace is > piece.

[AttonParticipant]

You dream may one day come true.

A MGTOW is a man who is not a woman's bitch!

[PuniShredderParticipant 2268]

This is War…Fight or Die. Those are your choices.

Contrary to what some would say here I would let the hate flow. This will help you go to war and divorce rape herf~~~ing ass!! Yes! Win one for us men who mostly lose….
Then later after you get over it, get healthy, Zen, find your true self again, you won’t feel anything for her anymore. Life will be good and you’ll be happy.

But for now she’s the enemy and you must vanquish her.

Be professional be polite but always have a plan to kill everyone you meet.

[NeroParticipant 1466]

@op: I logged in just to respond to you. There is always a silver lining to this kind of s~~~, bro. Yours is the fact that she has shown her cards to you as what type of human being she is. She was always this way, you just didn’t know it. You need to find solace in the fact you are jettisoning this toxic c~~~. One thing that may help is to document all the negative, and I’m sure there’s much, as it will help you realize what a relief this will actually be for you going forward. I know that splitting time up with kids sucks, but you will have your life and freedom back again. Embrace it! Another thing, if it weren’t for the kids, would you honestly stay married to her anyway? I hope this helps. Nothing worse then getting down being relieved by a hurtful c~~~ like this. Don’t do it.

[inneedoftruthParticipant 94]

Thank you for all the advice gentleman. Feeling one step closer to ZFG at the moment.

My boys got the flu and told their mom they wanted to be with me this weekend while they recover. Amazing the therapy hanging with my two little dudes and watching fight club can bring! The realization there was no estrogen in the house was heartwarming.

F~~~ her…

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