I am loosing my best friend.

[EyeswideopenParticipant 2930]

I make this post with a heavy heart, from a place lower then I was when my ex left. I found out that my dad is terminal; he has a few short months to live. I just needed a place to vent.

In short, this man is my hero, protector and my best friend. The older generation that supported their families and had wives that respected them for it. A man that would give you the shirt off his back. He’s in his 70s -not young by any extent but not extremely elderly.

From a medical standpoint I fully understand the process of dying. I know what to expect. I know he has pain and deteriation in his future. I will be there for him. He shows little fear just a regret that he could not see my nieces and nephews grow. The courage he shows is awe inspiring. He’s more worried about me then his own situation.

I just don’t want to say goodbye.

- Marriage is described as an institution. You would have to be crazy to be commited to it. -"If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal. Not people or things" Albert Einstein

[CoolbreezeParticipant 442]

I’m sorry for what you are experiencing right now. It sounds like you will have no regrets as your relationship is solid and for this you both are truly blessed. Always keep this gratitude with you as you will carry his legacy and that is a highly noble task.

[TaxGuyParticipant]

Sorry brother. Enjoy what time you have left and make him laugh as often as you can.

Give him the chance to give death the middle finger if you get the chance. I’ll never forget KM telling the story about getting his dad a drink when none of the women would do it.

Order the good wine

[CarnageParticipant 22113]

Sorry pall.

Can’t say i understand you, but I’m sure must be a bad time.

To those following me, be careful, I just farted. Men those beans are killers.

[Anonymous 42]

You’re lucky you can be close to him, I’m still regretting that day when it comes.

Sorry for your losses too, and what you’re going through.

[the roadParticipant 3125]

I don’t even know what to say brother. I imagine if I was in your situation that I would spend as much time as possible with your Pop before the inevitable happens.

Hoping the best for you and your family.

#MANOUT

[ghostParticipant]

I have no words, brother. We are here for you. Hang in there man.

[BigvernParticipant 1983]

I’m sorry to hear your bad news brother, but at least you can vent here and find some clarity, through the fog, that you must be experiencing, just now.

He is YOUR BEST FRIEND, so you could try to do, what is best for both of you, until that day comes. Then it will be upto you, to make the necessary arrangements, and begin to move on with YOUR life.

Eyeswideopen wrote:

He’s more worried about me then his own situation.

That’s it, @eyeswideopen He HAS ACCEPTED, his future, HIS fate, so like he is sad he will not see his Grandchildren grow old, he is also worried that he will NOT SEE YOU MATURE FURTHER, after he is gone.

Use the time, you and he both have wisely, so at least there is one F*CKING DAY, that you and he shares together, that YOU REMEMBER, AND SMILE, CRY, LAUGH ETC, WHILE YOU REMEMBER THAT DAY.

As he has done, BROTHER, learn to accept the inevitable, and move forward after that day.

I know it’s hard to grasp, but just do what’s IMPORTANT, to you both.

I wish I had a Father I could look up to, like you do.

CHERISH what you still have together.

"What made you think, there'd be a livin' in sheep?, Eat, Work, Eat Work and Sleep" - Mark Knopfler.

[Anonymous 11]

@EWO: I’m sorry. It’s very difficult on us.

[IRuleMeParticipant]

No amount of words a person can say can truly make the situation better. Because the pain doesn’t dissipate with words. It comes with time. I recently put my buddy of 16 years down, and while the decision was right, it was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. Esp to be there at the end. In fact, I awoke from a dream just this morning where I dreamt he was alive and had to go outside to the bathroom. I woke up, put my feet on the floor and realized he wasn’t here. Reflect on your positive times and try not to linger on the loss.

[Anonymous 1]

I am deeply sorry for this situation of yours, take your time to say goodbye and tell him whatever you have in your heart, let him know what a great father and man he was and is.

I wish I could have done that with my father, but I could not.

Life sucks.

[PistolPeteParticipant 27143]

Allow me to express my deepest sympathy. Unfortunately all any of us can offer is condolence and support which I’m sure seems negligible compared to the loss you face. Dealing with the loss of a loved one is very difficult indeed but as the brothers above point out we are here to lend whatever support is necessary.

I wish I could say something “righteous” and uplifting but I can’t. As a Christian all I can say is that your Dad will be escorted by an Angel and ushered into the loving presence of God. Your Dad will then know an eternity of love, and peace. When the grief of loss tears at your heart just remember your Dad is with God in his eternal kingdom. John 14:1 “Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe in Me as well. 2 In My Father’s house are many rooms. If it were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? 3 if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and welcome you into My presence, so that you also may be where I am.…”

[LupusParticipant 214]

Strength in the coming times, brother. I am sorry.

[Anonymous 6]

Wishing you strength to get through this difficult time.

[Prefer Peace to PieceParticipant 10809]

Eyeswideopen-

I’m so sorry you are going through this. Spend time with him. Laugh together. Tell him you love him.
I’ve had a few family members pass, and it’s hard.
Life here is like a vapor. It helped me to look beyond this life. Your dad’s absence is only temporary. You will see your dad again in heaven someday and you both will have new bodies. A million years from now you both will probably be playing golf in heaven or something.
Try to stay close with family and friends. You and your dad are in our prayers.

[Anonymous 14]

EyesWideOpen,
Brother, stay strong, keep your kin strong, and spend as much time with him as you are able. Even after he is gone, he will still be with you. Best wishes to you <)

[PistolPeteParticipant 27143]

So long as they are remembered and cherished they are never truly gone.

[EyeswideopenParticipant 2930]

Brothers, I really appreciate the support. I’m in a state of shock – besides some recent innocuous complaints he was in very good apparent health. I say this as a son and not as a physician but “he does not look sick”.

He knows how I feel about him, and how much I love him, and I believe we will meet again in the hereafter.

I will help him through this final process to the best of my abilities. Death could be weeks, or many months away depending on how things progress.

As much as I love my mom, I know she will make the process much harder. My old man had requested multiple times to just enjoy his last days and die in peace with his children and grandchildren. If that’s not an indictment of marriage brother, I don’t know what is.

A man wants his children around him when he goes, not his wife, and I totally understand. Unfortunately she will make this process so much harder. Even though she is my mother within the confines of a relationship she is an AWALT.

I’m ashamed to admit that as much as I grieve with my dad about his situation, I grieve for my own mortality and how my life will change without him. We have seen each other almost every day since I was born – we live about 10 min apart.

Intellectually I knew that this day would eventually come, I just dread it with ever fibre of my being.

Added: I will miss talking about construction projects and tools. I will miss walking through big box stores, framing basements and building sheds. I will miss his cooking and gruff demeanour. I will miss him calling the ex a “f~~~ing c~~~”. He always supported me when I was right and told me when I was wrong.

- Marriage is described as an institution. You would have to be crazy to be commited to it. -"If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal. Not people or things" Albert Einstein

[PistolPeteParticipant 27143]

You make me wish that I had a better relationship with my dad than I did. We hated one another. So in many ways you are very fortunate.

[MonkParticipant 16996]

My father died of cancer some years back, so I understand. Make sure that you take the opportunity to say everything you want to say to him.

[Author]

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