Hysterectomy Trigger

[buzzhawkParticipant 2]

My wife got a hysterectomy over ten years ago and shortly there after is when I started thinking something was wrong.  She was sounding like a different person.  There had always been little annoying things about her thinking, but now they were becoming more pronounced.  I recall asking her repeatedly, “Who the hell are you and where is my wife?”  I wasn’t joking.  Over the next few years I felt I like I’d been living on the edge of insanity trying to figure out what happened to her.  Even thought about cameras in the house to document it.  Thought she might be Bipolar, but it did not fit completely.  But I do think she has Borderline Personality Disorder.  In fact, many of the women I’ve been reading about here seem to have Borderline Personality Disorder or maybe even RAD.  My wife also has a lot of childhood crap that she will not talk about – like her whole childhood.  My life is an open book to her.  I don’t care, but as time went on I was not learning anymore about her as a little girl growing up.  I was not looking for s~~~ to hold over her head, but she sure used my past against me.  So she has always had more control in the marriage.  I have gone from being a roommate, a boyfriend, to a husband, down to subhuman housemate, back to a roommate, to a psychiatrist and now I’m like a teacher or some kind of supervisor over her and she is around 12 to 14 years old.  Now, I can see when she is baiting me into something (and why) and I just blow it off – no matter what. She lost that respect to be heard.  If she doesn’t follow up, then it really was bulls~~~.  Thanks to the guys on this site and others like Barbarossa I have a clearer view of what is going on in the minds of the female human species (vaginus trappus resoursus).

Over the past couple years I’ve been removing myself mentally and spiritually from her, but I’m not ready to split yet.  And why should I go anyway?  Just divide up our s~~~ and get out.  In the meantime though, we have a teenage son whom is not expected to not live past 20 or 21 years old and I can’t leave him till then.  Funny that I have always held most of the cards, in this relationship, but never knew it.  She was playing high stakes poker to my Go Fish and bluffing most of the time.  However, I never thought it was a ‘game’ we were playing, just two close friends going through life together.  In the end I just feel betrayed with years wasted from my life – thank you Feminism.  So much for being equal and fair.

You know, I don’t mind being wrong if it leads to truth and understanding.  I don’t mind apologizing if I hurt someone and end up getting to know them better.  But women do seem to play ‘games’ more often in order to get what they want instead of taking the direct route. That’s not living.  That’s not truth.  That’s not experiencing and getting the most out of life – its something much much less.  Death.

P.S. For days now I have got that song by Harry Nilsson stuck in my head “You’re breaking my heart”; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6-kjUWcr7d4

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