How long to be certain before divorce?

[MisterBigCatParticipant 9]

Hello Men of MGTOW,

What a great community for reclaiming masculinity. I want to say that since taking the red pill, it’s been a phenomenal journey.

I am now so comfortable with myself, that I am basically totally disinterested in my wife. I keep wishing that she would go on another trip to see her family out of state… I did not want her to come back from the last one.

I was wondering how long does the group here feel that you need to be certain, before filing for divorce? I am married no kids, great shape, under 30…. I just feel like I hosed myself getting married, and now that I’ve found myself, my life is just out of reach!

I don’t want to hurt my wife, my resentment is actually directed at myself for not seeing her and the world objectively.

I don’t believe that she is happy, but the separation will be hard on both of us.

Just curious if I should “ride it out” and see if we can find equilibrium (if so how long do I ride it out?) , or just pull the trigger and never look back…

[KeymasterKeymaster]

MisterBigCat wrote:

I was wondering how long does the group here feel that you need to be certain, before filing for divorce? I

I don’t think it’s a unanimous opinion or up to anyone else. MGTOW is you deciding everything. That’s the beauty of it all. Not what a married man is used to, but really take 10 minutes to think about it and imagine the freedom.

My brother actually believes he makes the decisions in his marriage. Wife calls out from the kitchen “do you want chicken or steak tonight?” He says chicken like he’s the man and decides it….. but all he did was pick one of her controlled choices. I actually witnessed this. One day I told him to call back to her and say “Neither!! I want beer and pizza!!”. She started ragging on him. That’s a married man.

She lets you think you’re in a 50-50 relationship but if you don’t pick one of her controlled choices, all hell breaks loose. She will even start the question with “do you want” like it’s YOUR idea:

“Do you want to get married in the summer or the winter? ”
There is only one answer to that “I’m hungry. Do we have any pretzels?”

“Do you want to go to my parents or for a picnic this weekend?”
Tell her you would rather stay home and watch the game,
and the next thunderclap you hear will be the sound of her vagina slamming shut for 3 days.

So don’t give a damn about “the group” and let yourself be the guide.
The group is less of a “group” and more like a population of free-thinking individuals.

it’s a fact that in most states you will pay 1.5 days of alimony for every 1 day you were married (as a general expectation).
So isn’t one more day just one too many?

The longer you wait, the more costly and painful the extraction.

I leave the rest to you. Welcome to MGTOW and the forums,

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[Anonymous 18]

MisterBigCat wrote:

Just curious if I should “ride it out” and see if we can find equilibrium (if so how long do I ride it out?) , or just pull the trigger and never look back…

It’s lot harder to pull the trigger compared to riding it out. I don’t think anyone here can give you an objective answer.

There are many introductions here with men going through very difficult times when breaking up or pulling the trigger as you say. It could be one of the most difficult times of your life; and she can make it exponentially more difficult for you.

I can’t think of any reason you would casually want to just bye-bye to your wife. Waking up to the world and women is still not a good enough reason for you to seek a divorce. That sort of s~~~ is what women pull on men.

How is your marriage? What’s her role in it? What issues are you guys dealing with? What makes her disinteresting?

Seems to me you might have just gotten bored of her. Don’t use MGTOW as an excuse brother ‘cuz you’ll be back on to next pussy once this is one is out of your life.

[KeymasterKeymaster]

Anonymous wrote:

Seems to me you might have just gotten bored of her. Don’t use MGTOW as an excuse brother ‘cuz you’ll be back on to next pussy once this is one is out of your life.

That’s a good point.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[Won'tGetFooledAgainParticipant 3293]

Personally if I were you I would do it sooner rather than later, especially as you don’t have any children. It will never get any easier than it is now and if she decides she fancies a few years off work and gets pregnant then you are absolutely screwed.

I ended up getting divorced at 40 and my biggest regret in life is that I feel I totally wasted my late 20’s and 30s, which as far as I am concerned were the best years of my life. Rather than ending up at 40 with nothing I could have had a house fully paid for by now and spent my 30s knee deep in pussy.

My one bit of advice is if you are seriously thinking of getting divorced is to stop having sex with her or to at least wear a condom. She is getting to the baby rabies age and if she has any inkling you are looking to bail, trust me she will get pregnant and trap you in 18 years of baby jail..

I think you are just bored of the pussy and you will be out hunting for more as soon as you are free from her.

For women, everything eventually boils down to Alpha Fucks, Beta Bucks.

[Robert HallamParticipant 696]

I wasn’t going to respond to this because I have no expertise, except by the virtue of being a divorcee many years ago. But after reading the advice so far and re-reading your post, it has become obvious to me that you should pull the plug. I can not see you continuing and being happy (that probably goes for the both of you) and you are still at a point where you can separate amicably. The fact that you have no kids and your age being under 30 gives you huge Sexual Market Value (SMV). This is going to end in divorce sooner or later so you may as well sit down and have the talk. Split the assets and stay friends.

[HitmanParticipant]

greetings man ! ..sooner is always better , and w no kids it’s easier ..much much easier .. listen to your heart . go on a roadtrip alone for a few days .. get a little taste of freedom ..

[PhantomParticipant 3328]

I am not objective.
I have been chewed up and spit out into pieces twice.
It took over 16 yrs of my life.

How long to be certain before divorce?
How much do you want it to costs you?
How complicated will it have to be?
Child Support, if a kid ever becomes part of the marriage?

The first moment you began contemplating this question was when?
Are the potential risks worth it?

Hoping you do not get burned like I did
Wish you all the best

[EntropyParticipant 902]

The fact that you are asking IS your answer.

"Compare your lives to mine and then kill yourselves" -BBR

[MGTOWmonkey aka No More Fucks To GiveParticipant 6635]

Do it before she does,if she’s not happy also then divorce is inevitable. The more in front of the situation you are the better control you have of the outcome. Dont let her get her a lawyer behind your back and start foolish arguments or have you arrested or some stupid crap! If you want out take a leap of faith like you did to get married and leap the hell out!

Never lose sight of what brought you here.

[LonerBonerParticipant 358]

Dude! If your asking about it you are ready to leave!
Dont do it like i did, waited 8 extra years after i knew it was going to hell.

She will be hurt, she will hate you, she will talk s~~~ about you, she will take everything she can from you! But thats no rason to stay! Your freedom and happiness is YOUR responsability! Make it happen.

Keep clam i'm dyslexic.

[MisterBigCatParticipant 9]

I deeply appreciate ALL of the replies. I perhaps stated my question in a manner that made it sound as though I was looking for someone to tell me what to do in MY particular situation, in re-reading (some of you saw through it) I was really looking for the voices of experienced men who could weigh in.

Thank you very much. Every time I taste the freedom… not looking to run into another woman’s arms… not looking to get into another ltr… likely ever. I just see all of the potential of framing my life the way that I want. I have begun to do so now, and I just feel like she is in the way…

At this point, I am driven and have a plan for my future. It requires sacrifice and stoicism. I want to be free of the negativity, and the responsibility to my wife. At this point, it would be more like breaking up with a girlfriend. No major assets… she could take me for all 4 figures (lol).

I am not afraid of the “fall out” I have always gone my own way, but drug her along with me. I don’t keep a lot of close company, and yeah… she will probably tell the tale of what a s~~~ty husband I was and so on… but who cares? Not me.

Reading these responses (both “sides” of the argument) and the questions raised here, were easy for me to answer, and THAT was what I was looking for. Some objective perspective, and someone to raise points to consider. I understand that it is my decision, and your input has aided me.

Many thanks for the warm welcome!

[Just a ManParticipant 934]

MisterBigCat wrote:

I am now so comfortable with myself, that I am basically totally disinterested in my wife

THAT is your only reason for wanting a divorce? I am clearly missing something, because that is the worst excuse I have read on these forums. Just how many “bridges” have you stock piled anyway? I’m with KM on this one, in fact I’m wondering if you are “having a go at us”.

Not trying to offend, but my trust issues extend even here.

Philosophy, the female repellent

[MisterBigCatParticipant 9]

With regard to Matoomba’s statement, and citation… I intended it to land this way:

I no longer look to my wife for validation… I feel complete as a man and a human being… I don’t feel connected to her, and if I am not getting validation from her, and don’t feel interested – then why am I with her? This is what I am asking myself, and came here to hear opinions about whether this typically passes (and attraction returns) or if the indifference just grows.

[Symmetric MGTOWParticipant 570]

Just a Man wrote:

MisterBigCat wrote:

I am now so comfortable with myself, that I am basically totally disinterested in my wife

THAT is your only reason for wanting a divorce? I am clearly missing something, because that is the worst excuse I have read on these forums. Just how many “bridges” have you stock piled anyway? I’m with KM on this one, in fact I’m wondering if you are “having a go at us”.
Not trying to offend, but my trust issues extend even here.

Given that I am going through a divorce -and it is one of the s~~~tiest experiences I have been put through in my life-, I have to agree with this comment.

I mean, we bash women left and right for dumping loyal men like used tampons, because they did such and such or they do not ‘feel it’ anymore.

This thread and the reasoning behind it, even though is more or less sound, comes across as childish, as some sort of whoopsie!, while using MGTOW to justify the decision.

Not trying to offend anyone, it’s just how all this comes across…

[PhantomParticipant 3328]

MisterBigCat wrote:

experienced men who could weigh in.

MisterBigCat wrote:

Some objective perspective, and someone to raise points to consider.

Experienced = check
Objective = I am a realist on my perspective regarding the subject
Raised points to consider = check

2 out of 3

MisterBigCat wrote:

came here to hear opinions about whether this typically passes (and attraction returns) or if the indifference just grows.

Depends on what you find attractive, but the vibe I get from you in this thread, is no, this doesn’t sound like it will pass for you & depending on how you proceed, will determine whether or not your indifference just grows.

Greetings & welcome
Wish you the best

[Dark KenshiParticipant 2132]

Pull the trigger, brother.

That indifference will only grow with the time, and things will get much more financially destructive for you than it will be for her.

Believe me, if the things were flipped around, you would be divorced for now.

But one advice MUST BE given:

If you are divorcing her just because you are bored, then you will fail and fail hard.

You will just fall in the arms of another woman who will be ten times worse than her, you know? Karma is a f~~~ing bitch, DO NOT mess with her.

But if you are divorcing her because you LOST your interest in EVERY SINGLE WOMAN in the world, then go ahead and pull the trigger.

It is always better sooner than later. The later on, more emotional, financial and physical stressful it will be.

"Young was I once, I walked alone, and bewildered seemed in the way; then I found me another and rich I thought me, for man is the joy of man." Odin, Hàvamàl, stanza 47.

[Symmetric MGTOWParticipant 570]

I think that our sincerity scared this brother away…

Hope that’s not the case, and I hope that he reconsiders his position if he is just looking to get rid of his wife to get more pussy freely in the future.

[OgreParticipant 5863]

Brother, MisterBigCat, you haven’t even reached the hard part of marriage yet. If you think you’re bored with her at your age, just wait. If an “accident” happened right now, you’d be almost 50 once you’re off the hook for support. Consider the wisdom the menbers have already offered you. You are at the easiest point of a marriage to walk away mostly intact.

I failed to realize in my youth that I was the prize. I was going to work. I was going to earn. Little did I realize that due to feminism, that no longer meant I had to share. Road soon, Desert after.

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