Where do I start? I’m now 42, and my divorce will be final within a few weeks. We met when I was almost 36, and she was 26. She had an 8 year old daughter, and despite my prior personal prohibition on dating anyone with a child, I decided to be a little more open minded. Right from the start she was “The Cool Girl”. She obviously liked to have a good time, and was up for anything. Anything but sex anyway, for the first month. Then it was anything goes; Put your dick anywhere you want……Have a rough day, mind if I suck your dick? What can I say, I fell for the hook.
She asked me to move in after a month, and my lease was up, so what the hell right? You only live once. I knew she liked to party, and I was having a good time as well, until the party was happening even when her daughter was not at her Dad’s.
After we’d been together a few months, she got pregnant. It wasn’t bad news, we had actually been talking about getting married, and I did want a kid of my own. Then a few weeks later, she had a miscarriage. I was supportive, doing everything I could to help her with all the emotions she was going through. The drinking returned, and was far more aggressive. After a couple of months, things settled down, and we talked about the future again. Everything got better, and then she got a new job. At the end of the two week training period, she told me the class was getting together that Friday night to celebrate. She said I could come, sort of, but it was clear that she didn’t want me to go.
She didn’t come home. I tried calling her numerous times, afraid that she was drunk and would try to drive home, but she didn’t answer. She ended up calling me around midnight, drunk at some guy’s apartment. She didn’t come home until the next morning. I got the “I blacked out, don’t know what happened, please forgive me” speech, and like an idiot, I fell for it.
I’ll shorten it up for you at this point. She got pregnant again a few months later, and we had a son. (DNA Paternity confirmed). After 6 months she stopped breast feeding, and went to the bottle. A lot. She would get verbally abusive, and one time, even gave me a black eye because I wouldn’t let her in the baby’s room because she was drunk. At this point, I knew I had made the wrong decision in sticking around, but with an infant son, I also had to bite the bullet and stick around, just to protect him. We got married (Yes, stupid), and at least the drinking stopped, for the most part. It was replaced with the most restrictive, overbearing jealousy and insecurity I’ve ever been a witness to. Any halfway attractive female on TV or in a movie was automatically labeled a whore, any appearance by a less than fully clothed woman got it turned off immediately; Hell, she even cut the cartoon bikini top girl out of the GTA game case. She went through my books, and any of them that so much as mentioned infidelity was thrown in the garbage (without my knowledge). Masturbation was cheating. It got really bad.
Last year, in January we decided to separate, so that we could work on the relationship. I had some counseling sessions, and she seemed to be figuring a few things out. Her friends were even telling her that she was going overboard. Around the middle of June things had progressed to the point that we started talking about me coming back home. She and the kids were taking a weekend trip, and she asked me to go.</p>
That Friday evening I was supposed to meet her at the house. I get there, and no one is home, so I head over to my son’s babysitter’s house, and she’s there, drunk. I put them in my truck, and the babysitter and her husband follow us back to the house in the wife’s new car. I take my son inside, and come back out to where she’s giving the guy a hug that’s a little too close. I thank them for bringing the car back, and we go inside, and I ask her what is going on. She starts crying, and I know immediately. She had a fling with them.
So now I’m rebuilding, and I’m going to do it my way, until the day I die. I take responsibility for every stupid decision I made along the way in that mess; I’m just as much at fault because I went along with it.
I’m so glad I found this place, and a few stories similar to mine. It helps.
Lazarus Long 4 years, 11 months ago.
