I’m going to give you the same advice as everyone else here. It’s a waste of time trying to talk to them. they aren’t seeking truth or fact. They are seeking reassurance for their chosen belief system which is designed to avoid both.
That being said, I do have a confession to make. About a week ago, I was in a similar situation at work. Standing at a place where I needed to be to wait for something so I could start my job, there were two women talking. Both standing and waiting with me, while having their own discussion. Both are post wall, divorced and not happy that they have to work at all. I was mostly ignoring them (as is my habit when women speak) checking email on my phone and crap like that trying to keep my brain occupied while I waited.
As their conversation got around to men and divorces, I looked up from my phone, but didn’t say anything. One of them looked at me and said, “you’re not married, are you?”. I just held up my left hand, pointed to my ring finger (No ring) and said, “Nah, too risky…”. Then, I just looked back down at my phone. I expected them to ignore me after that. Looking back down at my phone and not elaborating was the hint they were supposed to take that I wouldn’t be participating further in the conversation. It was me sliding back under the radar. At least, it was supposed to be.
The very next line out of the older one was, “Whaddya mean! Divorce laws are totally biased in men’s favor!”. For just a split second, I thought she was joking. I expected the other one to giggle, but heard silence. I started to ignore it, but I got a little confused about wether she was joking. I looked up at her to see if she was serious, or just screwing with me. And I saw that she was dead serious. From the look on her face, I could see she clearly believed what she had said.
I busted out laughing, right in her face. It was the rudest thing I’ve done in a long time, but I couldn’t help myself. I wasn’t ready for it. If I had known she was going to say that, I would have prepared myself better and been completely stoic. Even when I disagree, I’m not rude. But I was so surprised, I just lost it.
But soon after I realized that she was serious, I was insulted, and then I was p~~~ed off. I wasn’t ready for that insult either. I did the same thing you did. I pulled out some logic, and some stats and dumped that s~~~ all over her. I was merciless. I didn’t raise my voice, but didn’t give her time to answer either. I wrecked her.
When I had regained control, I transitioned into a more civil discussion with them. I learned that while both agreed that they had been the victim, both had come away from the deal with their (free) house. The reason they felt like victims was that their ex’s had not lived up to their expectations, not because they hadn’t hit the divorce jackpot. After getting married, they didn’t live happily ever after, so they were victims. In their minds, the free houses were not even worth mentioning compared with the loss of their happily ever after fantasy. That’s what they were p~~~ed about. The free house wasn’t even a factor in the equation.
That’s how completely entitled they are. In their minds, if you don’t keep them happy for the rest of their lives, they take your house. But even then, you still owe them. In their minds, the divorce laws are biased in favor of men because they don’t force men to keep them happy for the rest of their lives. They only bankrupt men, and that’s not enough to keep them happy for long. Trying to reason with that mindset is a waste. They’re too far gone.
As expressed by an old surgeon I knew once, “Don’t try to bring barbecue’d chicken to a veterinarian…”.
Look, it's not my fault that tornado dropped a house on your sister. Now get back on your broom and get your ass out of here... and take your monkeys with you
~BS 2 years, 6 months ago.
