Home › Forums › MGTOW Central › Getting "Triggered" and managing it
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Anonymous 2 years, 4 months ago.
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I’ll admit, I used to be that guy that made fun of people for getting triggered over what I thought were minor things. But as I started to observe people a little better, I realized everyone gets triggered, and some deal with it differently. And of course I get “triggered” as well.
I certainly did laugh at those that needed to go home and cry after whatever “Triggering” occured in real life where they determined it was the end of the world, only to remember I was like that at one point as well.
I’ve also heard through private groups how some people when they get triggered, you need to leave immediately, unless you’re looking for a new face lift after he kicks your head in.
I’ve witnessed people lose their minds destroying furniture and public property as I sat at a table eating lunch. In fact one day, one of these creatures was screaming racial obscenities and expletives at me, and any moving human or animal he came across. Good riddance, I’m certain someone dealt with him that day, and I hope he was crippled.
I decided I wouldn’t judge people for whatever triggers them anymore, and I learn from everyone to manage myself as best as possible.
Some things I’ve done that I know for certain that work are:
Going to the gym, whether to lift heavy, get hit and hit or roll.
Eating healthy and maintaining your body.
Having a pet.
Having a trusted friend you know you can hold accountable (this is very important).
Having no debts, all bills paid, no mechanical failures in your home or car.
Escaping urban areas to rural trails or National Parks.
Ambient, Neo-Classical, Lo-Fi, or Dark Ambient music.
This is some of the things that I’ve done to cool off before I make a mistake which I’ll regret. I’ve done a lot to harden myself, lower my attack surface, and to increase the threshold before I let my guard down.
Any thoughts?
Just my observation/opinion.
When people get “triggered”, it’s usually not about the event itself, but of past unhealed trauma.
Like people who grew up in an unfair household, where rules were constantly changing, rules didn’t apply to some people, chaotic because of lack of leadership. It’s often these people will grow up with heavy resentment towards all authority, police, courts, everything. Because they were traumatized by the household authority.
Trigger is an interesting phenomenon and I’m convinced from my own practice, that it can be overcome.
I’ve come to the conclusion that all negative emotions are created by a lack of understanding.
All positive emotions, infatuation/falling in love for example, are caused by a lack of wisdom.
Lack of wisdom usually leads to a negative emotion, which is caused by a revealing lack understanding. Such as many fall in love, go through hell, then find mgtow and understand. Once they understand, they are less likely to make the unwise choice with a woman, his they don’t fall in love or become infatuated.
As far as most people. They just have to go through it, lifetime after lifetime of triggers/repeated trauma. Most will never look for a solution.
That’s my thoughts.
Truth has no place to live in the mind of a woman.
Just my observation/opinion.
When people get “triggered”, it’s usually not about the event itself, but of past unhealed trauma.
Like people who grew up in an unfair household, where rules were constantly changing, rules didn’t apply to some people, chaotic because of lack of leadership. It’s often these people will grow up with heavy resentment towards all authority, police, courts, everything. Because they were traumatized by the household authority.
Trigger is an interesting phenomenon and I’m convinced from my own practice, that it can be overcome.
I’ve come to the conclusion that all negative emotions are created by a lack of understanding.
All positive emotions, infatuation/falling in love for example, are caused by a lack of wisdom.
Lack of wisdom usually leads to a negative emotion, which is caused by a revealing lack understanding. Such as many fall in love, go through hell, then find mgtow and understand. Once they understand, they are less likely to make the unwise choice with a woman, his they don’t fall in love or become infatuated.
As far as most people. They just have to go through it, lifetime after lifetime of triggers/repeated trauma. Most will never look for a solution.
That’s my thoughts.
This is exactly what I’ve heard reported from guys in social work that really know their stuff.
Andrew Vachss, a New York Lawyer is an extremely wise man whose words resonated with me. Everything he’s ever posted about protecting children and developing them into the best they can be, would solve a lot of problematic adults in today’s world.
A psychotherapist I stumbled recently through good friends, Zak Mucha, LCSW, wrote an impressive book, Emotional Abuse: A Manual for Self Defense, which described in great detail how my pain as a child, how it shaped me into the man I am today, and how certain events, noises, smells, and places and things getting into a very violent and emotionally activated state. But it ends quickly since I understood the problem, supposedly patched it, and worked twice as hard to make sure it doesn’t happen to the point where I cannot control myself.
There are passages in the book where I actually had to walk outside since traumatic incidents in my childhood conveniently resurfaced and played out in real time.
I remember reading that the physical pain will heal, but the emotional will stay long after and will certainly shape you.
A psychotherapist I stumbled recently through good friends, Zak Mucha, LCSW, wrote an impressive book, Emotional Abuse: A Manual for Self Defense, which described in great detail how my pain as a child, how it shaped me into the man I am today, and how certain events, noises, smells, and places and things getting into a very violent and emotionally activated state. But it ends quickly since I understood the problem, supposedly patched it, and worked twice as hard to make sure it doesn’t happen to the point where I cannot control myself.
Okay so I can’t edit my post, so I’ll re-write it here:
“. . . which explained in great detail how my pain and neglect as a child shaped me into the man I am today. It helped me understood why certain noises, smells, sights and places, words, facial expressions, body language, would activate a violent and senseless rage in me. But I’d calm down, since I supposedly patched these weak points, and I’d go back to the drawing board to harden my mind so it wouldn’t happen again, or I’d react in a better way.”
OldBill, thank you for correcting me in one of my previous threads in my old account. I keep you, Harold Bloom, M.H. Abrams, and the MLA in mind whenever I post.
Here’s the men I posted:
Yeah, but it’s been my experience that you can actually heal from the emotional stuff to the point that you no longer “feel” triggered. Just no reaction.
It’s very difficult work to do. Again, my belief is that this is lifetimes of material, traumas that repeat in cycles until they are completely overcome.
This is what certain meditations and things were about, burning karma(cause and effect), undoing negative programming.
It’s very interesting how it all works. Fear of death holds a lot of it in. Another one is the desire for love.
When I realized my parents never really loved me, merely saw me as an extension of themselves. A lot of their training/useless conditioning went away. Meaning I saw a changes in my values, my emotional behaviors, likes/dislikes, various things.
The denial/desire for one’s parents’ approval, that holds a lot of stuff/baggage. At least, that’s been my experience.
Truth has no place to live in the mind of a woman.
Yeah, but it’s been my experience that you can actually heal from the emotional stuff to the point that you no longer “feel” triggered. Just no reaction.
It’s very difficult work to do. Again, my belief is that this is lifetimes of material, traumas that repeat in cycles until they are completely overcome.
This is what certain meditations and things were about, burning karma(cause and effect), undoing negative programming.
It’s very interesting how it all works. Fear of death holds a lot of it in. Another one is the desire for love.
When I realized my parents never really loved me, merely saw me as an extension of themselves. A lot of their training/useless conditioning went away. Meaning I saw a changes in my values, my emotional behaviors, likes/dislikes, various things.
The denial/desire for one’s parents’ approval, that holds a lot of stuff/baggage. At least, that’s been my experience.
Exactly, and those are my greatest victories where I feel the most joy. I don’t have to forgive my enemies, or I could forgive them. Some do need forgiveness, and some don’t.
Some need something far worse.
But once that inoculation happens to trauma happens, that is were I win.
And I’m going to go a step further by not unloading my pain onto other people, and I’ll teach people I encounter in real life how to do stand their own ground.
It’s difficult with the learned helplessness some have placed themselves in, but it seems like some are becoming more open into taking care of themselves.
I realized everyone gets triggered,
Adults don’t.
It’s part of what makes them adults.
I do t like to come here and cry about my issues but I’ve lost my temper A LOT the last year or so. Financial stress then wife kids being insolent triggers me. I have a NASTY, LEGENDARY temper. Trying to figure out how to fix my existence but it will require me to disappear and start over.
Be professional be polite but always have a plan to kill everyone you meet.
Yeah, the church also creates a lot of traps, where people can’t heal correctly.
Forgiveness is one of those traps.
If you study the Greek, when Jesus used the word forgiveness, only once did I find it meant what we believe forgiveness to be.
From my translating, I came to the conclusion that forgiveness actually means to, “leave them behind and let them die.”, meaning like if they f~~~ed up, you just let them starve to death if that’s what will take place with you leaving them behind.
The forgiveness that the modern church teaches is what I call denial. Denial is extremely dangerous. If someone has been abused and they never acknowledge their own pain, but are in denial, in my opinion the damages, the consequences can be paramount. I believe this denial is actually the cause of most psychological/mental illness, including the debilitating kind, the kind that leave people handicapped.
Denial is horrible and should never be encouraged. This is what is being pushed by people who claim “forgiveness” is the way, quoting Jesus.
The Greek in the words of Jesus, all but one case of the word forgiveness came from a word that meant, leave them behind, let them die.
It simply means to walk away, don’t seek revenge, let it go.
At the same time, don’t ever have anything to do with them again. And if that means they starve, let them starve. It doesn’t mean to act like it’s no big deal and be loving again and all that, that’s called denial and does nothing but harm.
Truth has no place to live in the mind of a woman.
It simply means to walk away, don’t seek revenge, let it go.
At the same time, don’t ever have anything to do with them again. And if that means they starve, let them starve. It doesn’t mean to act like it’s no big deal and be loving again and all that, that’s called denial and does nothing but harm.
Seeking revenge is to act on one’s emotions and while you may get away with it, if you always feel so victimised you have to be vindictive you’ll end up in a lot of s~~~ and never learn to deal with the inherent injustices of life.
The way I deal with a lot of s~~~ is I attribute people’s poor behaviour down to being misguided and projecting their own insecurities on others. I agree with the walking away style. If you turn the other cheek you’ll get slapped again! People just like the path of least resistance because emotional labour is uncomfortable.
Courage is the key to life itself - Morgan Freeman
MGTOW is about improving yourself to your fullest potential and not letting anchors (women) prevent you from doing that. Looks like you are on the correct path for you.
Women's brains and vagina have one thing in common. There is nothing in there until a man puts something in there.
The common usage of the term “triggered” is an invention of modern feminism only about 15 years old. It is used primarily against men and I will never use the term except to disparage it.
It means “fly off the handle” or “have bad feelings”.
I agree with Sage.
Women don’t ever grow up so they are “triggered” all the time. If you use the “made to feel bad” criteria, women are triggered all day long.
Adults don’t.
It’s part of what makes them adults.
Since women can’t control their emotions, each school or workplace should have a women’s safe space away from men.
A lot of unproven psycho/social bulls~~~. Might as well look at bird entrails to tell if there are good omens or not.
#icethemout; Remember Thomas Ball. He died for your children.
I realized everyone gets triggered,
Adults don’t.
It’s part of what makes them adults.
The common usage of the term “triggered” is an invention of modern feminism on only about 15 years old. It is used primarily against men and I will never use the term except to disparage it.
Agree with Sidecar and Puffin Stuff. This “triggered” bulls~~~ is just childish behavior being displayed by adults, being rationalized as acceptible behavior by feminism.
If you get angry or upset throughout the day but still remain externally calm, congratulations, your an adult. You’ve come to realize that the world doesn’t revolve around you or your feelings. Most of the worlds comings and goings happen without any regard to your feelings about it. As an adult you learn this harsh reality and how to adapt to the world, rather than childishly expecting the world to conform to your whimsicle feelings.
If your “triggered” however, acting like these examples:
I’ve witnessed people lose their minds destroying furniture and public property as I sat at a table eating lunch. In fact one day, one of these creatures was screaming racial obscenities and expletives at me, and any moving human or animal he came across.
If you behave in this manner, your a CHILD.
THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS.
Women have acted like children for millenia. It is socially acceptible for women throughout history to be “triggered”, because they are physically weak. Their pouty little temper tantrums USED to be cute, in a Mans world.
Now that they have the nuclear (legal) option, it’s no longer cute or funny. It’s Goddamned Dangerous.
Accepting peoples “triggered” behavior is how we end up with the Las Vegas Shooter, the Newtown Massacre and others.
I have carried or at arms reach to a loaded firearm my entire adult life. I have done this as part of my profession for over a decade. I’m a MAN. I’m an ADULT. I do not have the luxury to be “triggered” because someone hurt my feelings.
When I was growing up, if a boy was displaying “triggered” behavior, he got his loud mouth knocked the f~~~ out by another student. They were typically sent home for the rest of the day, and both showed up fully reset at school the day after. There was no getting expelled for s~~~ like that. It was normal “schoolyard brawl” behavior.
No spanking, no paddling, no schoolyard brawls and no discipline is why we have these degenerate adults whining and crying like toddlers these days.
Triggering is used currently on college campuses to stymie the freedom of college professor to tell uncomfortable truths.
Most colleges and many public government entities now have safe segregated women’s only place to go to unwind and chat, maybe send some txt’s to their friends.
They also go there to conspire on ways to get ahead using all the tools of affirmative action and leading on lawsuits.
Women want to convert all spaces, including school and workplaces into “Safe Spaces” for women.
#icethemout; Remember Thomas Ball. He died for your children.
Anonymous1From my translating, I came to the conclusion that forgiveness actually means to, “leave them behind and let them die.”, meaning like if they f~~~ed up, you just let them starve to death if that’s what will take place with you leaving them behind.
The forgiveness that the modern church teaches is what I call denial. Denial is extremely dangerous. If someone has been abused and they never acknowledge their own pain, but are in denial, in my opinion the damages, the consequences can be paramount. I believe this denial is actually the cause of most psychological/mental illness, including the debilitating kind, the kind that leave people handicapped.
I agree with you @ever5, most people misunderstand the concept of forgiveness. It’s almost the biblical version of NFG. You forgive people by letting go of whatever they did to you, for YOUR OWN MENTAL WELL BEING. You let it go and move on, and if you’re smart you cut people that continually need forgiving out of your life. Forgiveness isn’t about letting someone continually abuse you, it’s about releasing yourself from the grip anger so that you can move on and lead a peaceful life.
Kids get triggered and can’t control themselves.
Adults get triggered too, but they learn to rationalise what happened and to learn something from it.
Its really stupid to let emotions be the boss of you. I try to see emotions from an eagle’s view and then it becomes possible to laugh at them without being affected.
So did they just replace the word “bring up bad memories” with “triggering”?
How can someone tell if they are bringing up bad memories for anyone without being in their heads.
Useless concept.
I guess since 7 out of 5 women are emotionally raped by their uncle, grandfather, father and brother all bad memories are the fault of men.
Because vagina.
#icethemout; Remember Thomas Ball. He died for your children.
This has nothing to do with forgiving anybody. This has to do with a political assault by feminists against men by saying men cannot be controlled and women are constantly reminded of their childhood rapes or any other slight so inmemorable that the “triggered” doesn’t even know why she’s upset (her period).
This assault is important as it is creating a hostile work environment for men in school, on campus and in the workplace.
I guess we should put on the yolk and just forget about it. Until it comes for you. Then I’ll forget about it.
#icethemout; Remember Thomas Ball. He died for your children.
Anonymous42Some things I’ve done that I know for certain that work are:
Going to the gym, whether to lift heavy, get hit and hit or roll.
Eating healthy and maintaining your body.
Having a pet.
Having a trusted friend you know you can hold accountable (this is very important).
Having no debts, all bills paid, no mechanical failures in your home or car.
Escaping urban areas to rural trails or National Parks.
Ambient, Neo-Classical, Lo-Fi, or Dark Ambient music.
All of the above except the music, music is as individual as religious extremists trying to argue with avid Atheists. Personally I like hard driving music with a good beat, rhythm, and perfect harmony.
Trigger is an interesting phenomenon and I’m convinced from my own practice, that it can be overcome.
Roger that!
Adults don’t.
It’s part of what makes them adults.
That Sidecar, he says so much with so few words.
I can’t count the times people expected an explosion or they were walking on eggshells over something out of their control or was an accident, and got nothing more out of me than “oh well, that’s how the cookie crumbles”.
I don’t like turbulent voices and toxic personalities and that is the legacy feminism has left on modern women.
If it isn’t calm, cool, and collected, even under fire, then it gets tossed from my life with all other toxic personalities.
Who needs spoiled screaming brats in their life?
Excellent responses everyone, thank you for taking the time to discuss.
2017-10-09 at 6:30 AM
If you behave in this manner, your a CHILD.THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS.
That’s a little generous, I think of people like that as more of the Walking Dead.
I realized everyone gets triggered,
Adults don’t.
It’s part of what makes them adults.
This was my mistake when I initially made this post. Six to seven years ago when I first got wind of trigger warnings, I had the same sentiments as you in regards to college students who needed these warnings or safe spaces. I still hold these feelings today.
What’s happening now is everyone whether they’re on the left are right are throwing the word “triggered” around based on if you have a reaction.
For example:
Some guy creates a channel focused on bettering men with hints of white nationalist sentiments.
He gets a hit piece from a far left channel or media figure.
First guy calls out far left guy on his bulls~~~.
Incoming responses to the first guy go like, “OMG, getting triggered so easily snowflake?”
And that’s where I no longer take these triggering, trigger warning, or safe space content seriously, because it’s lost it’s original meaning.
Some things I’ve done that I know for certain that work are:
Going to the gym, whether to lift heavy, get hit and hit or roll.
Eating healthy and maintaining your body.
Having a pet.
Having a trusted friend you know you can hold accountable (this is very important).
Having no debts, all bills paid, no mechanical failures in your home or car.
Escaping urban areas to rural trails or National Parks.
Ambient, Neo-Classical, Lo-Fi, or Dark Ambient music.
All of the above except the music, music is as individual as religious extremists trying to argue with avid Atheists. Personally I like hard driving music with a good beat, rhythm, and perfect harmony.
I can’t count the times people expected an explosion or they were walking on eggshells over something out of their control or was an accident, and got nothing more out of me than “oh well, that’s how the cookie crumbles”.
I don’t like turbulent voices and toxic personalities and that is the legacy feminism has left on modern women.
If it isn’t calm, cool, and collected, even under fire, then it gets tossed from my life with all other toxic personalities.
Who needs spoiled screaming brats in their life?
Makes sense, I should of just wrote, “Music I like”.
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