Getting the Estranged Wife to Move Out

[Robert HallamParticipant 696]

I have read dozens if not over a hundred questions on the internet that revolves around marriage breakdown and who should leave the house.  In many jurisdictions the spouse that leaves the home places themselves at a real disadvantage during the pending divorce proceedings.  It is akin to abandonment.  Almost all of the lawyers if have heard from in associations with these internet entries tell the husband not to leave the matrimonial home and that the wife cannot throw him out and change the locks.  He can remain under the same roof until the courts decide different.  But the problem then it sets up a situation where the estranged wife causes a kafuffle, calls the police, claims assault and battery, and has the estranged husband charged and held in prison.  That leads to him being ordered to leave by the courts.

I thought about this and I came to the conclusion that making living conditions for the estranged wife so bad that she would willingly move out could be a very easy prospect.  I suggest three different approaches, all of which would cause little or no damage to the house, so if you were to loose the house in the divorce it would all be easy to reverse:

Turn off the electricity.  I don’t mean have the city or utility company disconnect.  I mean simply remove the main breaker from the control panel.  If it’s removal needs to be disguised then replace it with a dummy (faulty) breaker.  No electricity, there is no furnace, no lights, no stove, no oven, no toaster, no microwave, no washer or dryer.   I can’t see a woman staying long under those conditions.  Maybe three days.

Turn off the water.  Again I don’t mean have the city disconnect the water or shut the street valve.  I mean simply shut off the water at the pressure reducing valve where the water line enters the house.  Alternatively install another shutoff valve downstream of the pressure reducer.  Without water there are no toilets, no shower, no drinking or cooking water, and no laundry.  Can you see a woman staying without water.  Maybe two days.

There is nothing stopping a husband from simply removing the front and back door (completely) from their hinges and removing them from the property.  I’m sure the estranged wife would feel pretty insecure at nights and willing to go elsewhere.  Maybe one day.

And there is nothing illegal about doing any or all of these three especially if you are renovating (check with your divorce lawyer).

[Anonymous 0]

Hi,

can you edit the post, making it easier to read ?

[Anonymous 0]

Ah, you already did it, thanks

[Anonymous 1]

Awesome tips.

I hope this helps someone that is going through this situation (divorce).

Cheers and thanks for the post

🙂

[narwhalParticipant]

I don’t like these ideas.  First off, if there are kids involved, you obviously don’t want to do this.  Second, you’re turning your spouse into an enemy and this can be seen as a vindictive action.  It sound like you’re making it so that if you aren’t happy there, no body’s going to be happy there.  It feels like you’re avoiding the confrontation(s) instead of dealing with them head on.

I don’t know you’re specific situation, but if you are concerned about false domestic violence claims, then start recording everything.  Put up security cameras.  If your wife knows they are there then she is less likely to try and pull a stunt.  Besides just the finances, and despite the hell you may be putting yourself through, it is good practice for saying no and setting boundaries.

In my case (years ago), I did not move out.  I thought I was manning up and giving her space.  I should have stayed and forced her to leave since she didn’t want the marriage anymore.   In hindsight, I made things way too easy for her.  She needed to deal with finding her own place or living with her parents full time.  She needed to be the one who left the kids.

Ok. Then do it.

[Bright guyParticipant 156]

I have just about finished my divorce. The ex wife said I should move out once she told me she  wanted a divorce.  I dug in like a tick. I said he’ll no I won’t go.

It went back and forth. At one point,  she wanted me to sign a 40 year mortgage because the mortgage wasn’t paid for the last 2 years. We both went down to the bank to sign the paperwork and she had a big sign smile on her face.Her smile disappeared as soon as I said I wouldn’t  sign until the lawyers said it was in my best interest. Of course  I got the “you are screw the kids.. The kids will have no where  to live ” speech.  She didn’t  know I knew her parents had received  a large inheritance which could easily  bought me out

.She got to the point when she said ” I don’t want it .. sell it”. It was amazing how her parents came up with the money after  I refused to sign a loan modification. Her parents  were even ready to front me my share of the proceeds now but my name would still be tied to the mortgage.  Again I said he’ll no. Last time I checked you wanted a divorce but you want me tied to a mortgage  for  a house I would forgo my right to live in.

She did everything  in her power to make me miserable  so I would leave.. but guess what she and the kids move out in 4 weeks. The house will be sold. My tactic  was to do absolutely nothing around the house. I stopped paying  the household bills as soon as she took me to court. The court said I only had to pay half the utilities. Man she was p~~~ed.  NO DEAL dear!!!!

. THE BEST PART ABOUT IT WAS I DID NOTHING!!! No turning off the electric..Water or removing doors. She tried many times to p~~~ me off to make me do something  stupid. I DIDN’T TAKE THE BAIT. SHE WAS CONVINCED I WAS RECORDING HER ALL THE TIME WITH MY PHONE. HER PARANOID PERSONALITY WAS HER OWN WORSE ENEMY.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[uchibenkeiParticipant 7965]

i didn’t leave.  wife asked me to and i said she can leave because i’m not going anywhere.  she took the kids to a womans shelter and claimed psychological abuse and said i was neglecting the kids.  all bulls~~~ of course.  living in the house alone was f~~~ing awesome.

I bathe in the tears of single moms.

[MgtowWaveParticipant 4352]

I know a woman who was arrested for DV and the husband bailed her out of jail and she took her exes kid and went  to a woman’s shelter.

frankly my dear i don't give a damn

[Robert HallamParticipant 696]

Dear Narwhal:

 

Yes, You are quite right in your comments about kids.  I also like your added suggestion of surveillance equipment to counter charges of domestic violence.  I had considered the kids, and of course it becomes a great deal more difficult.  Remember, these approaches are designed to work in the very short term.  I would expect the estranged husband to preface any action with proper arrangements for the kids.  For example he may want to hire a nanny and find proper accommodation for the kids at the home of one of the relatives.   I am not concerned about the confrontational aspect of these techniques.  When you get to this stage she wants YOU OUT AT ALL COSTS, and it’s war.  Believe me when the choice of who has to move out arises, you are already at the confrontational stage.  I personally wouldn’t have any difficulty living without water and electricity for a few days.  Do it all the time camping.

I thank you for your comment and actual input.  As you said you made it easy for your ex, as did I.  But in today’s world things are different.  The crap they use during the actual divorce would make your hair curle.  Women have memories like iron traps.

[RusskyParticipant 13503]

shutting off lights and water is too extreme.
A different wi-fi password and disconnecting her cellphone should do the trick in this brave new world

proud carrier of the 'why?' chromosome

[Puffin StuffParticipant 24979]

Bring a girl home and f~~~ her while your wife sits on the couch listening.

There is nothing illegal about it. Divorce is no-fault. How many women told their husbands they wanted a divorce by being discovered playing hide the sausage with the FedEx guy.

#icethemout; Remember Thomas Ball. He died for your children.

[Robert HallamParticipant 696]

Dear Russky KGB:

Yeah!  Cutting off her cell phone and changing the password to WiFi may work too.  But if it doesn’t then shutting of the power by throwing the main disconnect is no hardship and non-destructive, and shutting off the water at the pressure reducer is no hardship and non-destructive.  And I also like the idea of bringing a girlfriend over (a screamer) and that aught to work too.  Anything to get the bitch to move out, because the one who abandons the matrimonial home is usually the winner.

[Robert HallamParticipant 696]

I have just discovered another option from the internet.

Apparently the police were called to a domestic violence call and found the husband in the garage cutting up all the pictures on the walls.  The police officer advised him that being the owner of the house, he could do anything he wanted except destroy things because his soon to be ex-wife was also an owner.  From the ensuing discussion with the officer he learned that dismantling items was not destroying them provided they could be re-assembled.  He returned to the house, and starting with the upstairs bedrooms,  he dismantled everything that took a screwdriver, and placed all of the parts he removed into a cardboard box; the beds, the bathroom faucets, the draw runners on the dresser, the closet rail, etc.  He continued downstairs and dismantled everything he could, including the stove, the refrigerator, the washer, the drier, etc.  Piled everything in the middle of the room and again placed all the bits and pieces into the cardboard box.  Took the box of parts and headed for his small rented flat.

[Knights Templar RisingParticipant 5124]

Unless there are kids involved, all is fair in love and war.  I would not do things like shut down utilities.  OTOH taking everything apart seems like fair game.  If she complains, you can tell her “I took it apart, in case you wanted to take it with you when you move out”.

Women don’t even realize how dependent they are on men, and how many luxuries they need.  Tear things down to a minimalist spartan level, which most men could probably pull off for a year, and they will lose their mind within a month.  My first move would be to remove all mirrors, it will trigger their vanity.

Sovereignty above all else.

[DurdenParticipant 1051]

To get rid of a woman I recommend a body bag, cheap rug or if you plan to chop in pieces hefty bags. Be sure to make it look like an ancient or get rid of all of her thoroughly. Remove all teeth and do remove various things that can be used against you. Defiantly have an alibi.

It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything

[Anonymous 42]

Durden wrote:

To get rid of a woman I recommend a body bag, cheap rug or if you plan to chop in pieces hefty bags. Be sure to make it look like an ancient or get rid of all of her thoroughly. Remove all teeth and do remove various things that can be used against you. Defiantly have an alibi.

@durden, you don’t have to go through all that messy trouble, just be a “REAL MAN” and she will flee to the nearest c~~~ post on the carousel!

[experiencedParticipant]

The second she’s out, get the locks changed. She’ll come back when you’re not in “a man’s home is his castle[eff mancave bs]”  and  will cherry pick more in your absence.  Things headed that way? Usually guys’re the last to know, but if you’re an exception, take a slo-mo video camera stroll through all your property, it’s easier than writing down the items she’ll steal.  If too late, get coffee, sit at desk, clear your mind, and visualize said walk, while writing down all items.

Wait a sec, that C-word took the _______ that our child made for me, DEMAND it back.

[[Laughing …   now]]……..my boss said, “tried to contact you via email” Response, “sorry, she stole the computer”  boss “well, guess that covers that”

And don’t be surprised when she takes many items from another room, leaving only the one that’d been made for her by your child. I couldn’t believe it, this sort of thing bugs me…well, used to, she’s made her bed.

 

"It seems like there's times a body gets struck down so low, there ain't a power on earth that can ever bring him up again. Seems like something inside dies so he don't even want to get up again. But he does."

[Author]

Posts