Divorce Online

[SkeptiskParticipant 3679]

According to Romerikes Blad, you can now initiate a separation by sending an application online to the authorities.. Soon, however, the same can be done with divorce proceedings as well. Soon you’ll get your divorce sent through your email!! Now, this is something that happens here in Norway, were the bureaucracy are trying to speed up things and make proceedings more efficient. However, I am not clued in if the same thing happens in the US/Canada.

"Expecting to find a decent woman on a dating site is like dumpster diving and expecting to come out with a gourmet meal." Won'tGetFooledAgain

[Prefer Peace to PieceParticipant 10809]

Skeptisk-

Very interesting. Thanks for enlightening us.

In America, these greedy skanks want a financial windfall with their divorce.
(They simply want as much money as they can successfully squeeze out of a man, fairness be damned).

So, I wouldn’t be surprised if men had to include tax records, W2’s, etc. when filing. Maybe women could include instructions for just wiring all of your assets directly into their checking account – might be more effective.

[FrankOneParticipant 1417]

In the US, divorce is handled at the individual state level — as are dissolutions and anullments. So there are 50 different schemes, one for each State.

In a divorce, one party files a complaint and serves their spouse the papers. The spouse being served then files an answer, admitting or denying the allegations. It goes before a judge. This is typically a more adversarial way to end a marriage.

Dissolution tends to be more collaborative; you draw up a separation agreement and avoid legal fees. I recently ended my marriage with a dissolution. Total cost for the lawyer was one thousand five hundred dollars, which I paid. We had to get the separation agreement notarized and then go before a private judge a second time to certify we agreed to it. With this scheme you don’t have to wait for a judge/hearing.

There is no provision for online filing at least in my State, but lots of commercial web sites to prepare the forms for the judge if you don’t go with a lawyer. Either way you have to go to court. I’m pretty sure it’s similar in other States but I’m not a lawyer. I elected to just pay the lawyer as I wanted to make sure the forms were filed correctly.

It is necessary to list ALL your assets. Typically, anything acquired DURING the marriage is split 50/50 (debts OR assets). In my case, my marriage was short — 3 years and we had no children. Typically, the male party loses significantly in this process, because he more often than not generates most of the income and assets. Whichever partner did more market work loses BIG TIME financially in a divorce in America; one of my work colleagues even lost a significant fraction of his RETIREMENT. There is no correction to the 50/50 split based upon how much money each partner earned in the marriage or debts accrued by each partner.

There are certainly exceptions to marriages ending very badly for the man, but they’re rare. In my case, I was worth 180 times what my wife was worth, but we agreed that I only paid the cost of the dissolution and her health insurance for a year which maybe cost me a month of salary. But you’re basically at the mercy of the lower-earning spouse in America. They can choose to free you like a bird, or lock you up in a cage for the rest of your working life, especially if marriage is decades-long with children. The longer the marriage, the more ‘community property’ to be divided 50/50.

[OldBillParticipant]

Civil, or collaborative, divorces are recognized in all US jurisdictions. I have that from a lawyer friend of mine.

In such divorces, both parties work together to craft a civil contract spelling out all the aspects of the divorce such as finances and child custody. This collaborative effort can involve lawyers from the beginning or just when the final agreements need to be submitted to the court. Such divorces can cost only hundreds of dollars and take a surprisingly short period of time.

Once accepted by the court, such divorces are enforced as civil contracts. When one party fails to live up to the agreement – such as with the custody shenanigans c~~~s routinely play – the contract will be enforced through civil penalties and forfeitures.

The key to such divorces is that they are a collaborative effort. Both parties need to work together honestly and fairly. Sadly, because women are involved, the chances of an honest, fair, collaborative effort being made is rare. Women know the system is rigged in their favor and that they can get more out of a divorce if they choose to be combative instead of collaborative.

You get what you provide incentives for and our society provides innumerable incentives for poisonous, lengthy, soul destroying, man devouring divorces. And, because lawyers, courts, and state agencies make more money from such divorces, we’re never going to see any reforms to current system.

Do not date. Do not impregnate. Do not co-habitate. Above all, do not marry. Reclaim and never again surrender your personal sovereignty.

[MattNYCParticipant 2329]

I read somewhere “Marriage may be about love, but divorce is all about the money.”

In New York state it’s very old school – judges have to be involved, but you don’t necessarily have to go to court. No way this can be done online; it’s way too traditional here.

In the best case-scenario here, both parties can work out something amicable, get it in writing (without lawyers), then a judge has to certify it.

Next level of difficulty is both spouses have a lawyer, the lawyers negotiate, work out some deal, get it in writing, then a judge has to certify it.

The next level of difficulty is when spouses/their lawyers can’t agree, then it goes to a judge. This is when it takes years, given court schedules. Judges in NYS “re-interpret” pre-nup agreements and really slam the guys.

To give you some perspective, i was married for <2.5 years, total assets for both of us was about $50k (>95% of it mine***). I paid out $25k. Everyone i spoke to – my attorney, guys in the divorce support group, friends who have been through the grinder, etc. – every single one of them said it was the cheapest divorce they ever heard of.

Half of my measly assets for just 2.5 years of marriage. Are you f~~~ing kidding me?!

And no, the fact that she was cheating didn’t enter the equation at all. Every state in the US is now “no fault.” S~~~ like that only comes in to play when there’s violence or other seriously criminal activity (think fraud or some such).

***Interesting side note: For a long time i was good at *making* money, but not saving/investing. This was a silver lining in that she could *only* take that much. Ugh.

[KeymasterKeymaster]

Here is a little insight into what it’s like in Canada.

/video/david-foley-and-joe-rogan-on-the-nightmare-of-divorce/

To add….. you don’t even have to sign a contract. Live with her for 2 years and POOF! she’s you’re “wife”. When I discovered that, I actually made an ex move out — for that reason. I read some where they were quietly changing this to 1 year. So when/if it becomes law, if she’s been living with you for only 13 months ….. congrats, you just bought the cow. ( Er, I mean, “wife”). That parasite will be one bloody & costly extraction.

Remember. A woman doesn’t marry you “for the money”. She divorces you for it.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[OldBillParticipant]

Keymaster wrote:

Here is a little insight into what it’s like in Canada.

What happened to Dave Foley is criminal. Every time I listen to that interview with Joe Rogan I need to take a couple of breaks. While his ex is a satanic whore, he was incredibly stupid. As I listen I constantly waver between feeling sorry for him and wanting to slap some sense into him. Wasn’t there anyone in his life who tried to help him? Or did he dismiss them all?

To add….. you don’t even have to sign a contract. Live with her for 2 years and POOF! she’s you’re “wife”. When I discovered that, I actually made an ex move out — for that reason. I read some where they were quietly changing this to 1 year.

IANAL, but I think it varies by province much as how it varies by state in the US. I do know that British Columbia is talking about lowering the time requirement to less than a year.

Do not date. Do not impregnate. Do not co-habitate. Above all, do not marry. Reclaim and never again surrender your personal sovereignty.

[stopmockingmanParticipant 441]

OldBill wrote:

What happened to Dave Foley is criminal. Every time I listen to that interview with Joe Rogan I need to take a couple of breaks. While his ex is a satanic whore, he was incredibly stupid. As I listen I constantly waver between feeling sorry for him and wanting to slap some sense into him. Wasn’t there anyone in his life who tried to help him? Or did he dismiss them all?

I cannot bear to see this at all so here goes.

[Author]

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