Dealing with loss

[Sam FisherParticipant 206]

Hey brothers,

I hope this is the right section to seek this sort of advice. Thought I’d ask about how you deal with the loss of a man’s best friend (yeah, I’m talking about my dog I’ve had since I was little.)

I’ve been taking him to the vet, this one vet screwed me around, so we’re gonna take him to another one – but things don’t look good, so I’m not trying to get my hopes up too much, but I’m not being negative and dismissive of any possibilities either. I’ve already lost a very good friend of mine to suicide not too long ago, and this is just a twist of the knife the wound. If you guys have any you know, good advice or anything like that to tackle this s~~~, perhaps ideas of nice tributes and things I could do for my dog maybe? To make it easier. This s~~~ is killing me – but I just thought I’d come here and ask for some advice and help and ways of finding acceptance or comfort or whatever you call it.

Thanks again.

[MgtowWaveParticipant 4352]

Brother im sorry you are going thru this.

frankly my dear i don't give a damn

[ILiveAgainParticipant]

Your pain and hurt are there because of the bond you have shared.

However, it might be your dogs time to rest now. So you must allow that. You must give that freedom as payment for your dogs service and duty to you.

They will be with you way after the physical has gone.

Just as your friend who died is with you. Maybe you think about him more now and with greater emotion then when he was alive.

They were gifts ‘on loan’ to make your world a better place. That was/is their gift to you.

It’s now time you repay them by remembering what that have given…… and let them now go from their labour’s

Their were times when they were stong for you …… now it’s your turn.

Be strong for them. Honour their memory and service. Hold them in your heart forever.

[Crazy CanuckMember 4215]

My suggest is be strong for your dog it should help at least a little.  Remember all the good times.  I might be hard at first but once you practice it you will get better.  Negative thoughts can produce a negative field which can make matters worse, this is why having good thoughts is a lot better.

"If pussy was a stock it would be plummeting right now because you've flooded the market with it. You're giving it away too easy." - Dave Chapelle

[MOWsince95Participant 1446]

No advice can really help with the impending loss of a pet.  Best I can say is be brave, positive and loving with your friend until the end, and know that if something must be done that you are doing it for the best. It is heart-wrenching to be sure, but you owe it to him to show strength during this time.  There is time afterward to cry and mourn, and you will and nothing is wrong with that, but for now bottle it up for his sake.

As for rituals,  unless there is some ritual you know of that has helped you in the past, don’t expect much from engaging in it.  Love for a pet is very personal and very deep, and everyone sorts that out within himself, but just know whatever you do, you are doing out of that love for your best friend, and for his best interests.

If you are MGTOW when you are young you have no heart.
If you're not MGTOW when you are 20 you have no brain.

[RoyDalParticipant]

When the sad day comes, you will go through the “Five Stages of Grief.” Been there, done that, didn’t like it. My condolences.

Society asks MGTOWs: Why are you not making more tax-slaves?

[jack reacherParticipant 751]

Sam, I have been through this as well. You didn’t say what the condition was – by all means, do what you can but there is a time when the dogs suffering has to come to an end. If you have watched a loved one slowly wither away from long term illness or disease, where they are not cognizant and cannot even acknowledge you, I suspect they would also ask for the same ending we can give our pets.

It sounds like you care deeply for the dog, take what time you have left and cherish it, and don’t let the final moment define the many good years you have spent together. Take him to the special park, give him some special food, just lots of TLC. Unfortunately there isn’t an easy way to get through this, that is an indication of how much they mean to us. When the time comes, you will have to feel some pain, in order to honor the relationship.

I Live Again, having gone through it before, that was an eloquent post.

[Puffin StuffParticipant 24979]

Thanks for sharing. It makes me appreciate my dog, rosie, the sweetest golden retriever your ever gonna meet.

When she passes on I don’t know what I will do.

#icethemout; Remember Thomas Ball. He died for your children.

[BDParticipant 1146]

Dogs only usually get about 3000-4000 days on this earth. The best way to not have any remorse about your best friend’s passing is to make sure all of those days are the best you can make it for them.

For example, buying a dog to lock them in an apartment in a cage so that they are available when you need affection is selfish. Almost seems like something a feminist would do to a man….

ILiveAgain wrote:

However, it might be your dogs time to rest now. So you must allow that. You must give that freedom as payment for your dogs service and duty to you.

 <span style=”line-height: 1.5;”>Great post ILiveagain!</span>

MOWsince95 wrote:

but just know whatever you do, you are doing out of that love for your best friend, and for his best interests.

Sometimes when your pet is ill it takes more of a “man” to put them out of their misery and pain instead of letting them suffer for your own selfish time to spend with them, this is hard on the soul, and I wish you the best if this situation arises.

Because in order to be able to think, you have to risk being offensive.

[BubParticipant 1411]

I had to put a good dog down several years back.  I cried as much over his death than some people I’ve known. He was that much a part of my life.  My Vet asked if I wanted to have him creamated?  I didn’t know that was an option until he asked, so I did.  Now he sits on the fireplace mantle and gives me fond memories daily.  I’ve had more good dogs since and always hope they’ll be “mantle worthy” when they need to leave me.  I’ll have their ashes buried with me when I go.  Just an option you might consider.

There are also Vet’s that will come to your house for the end so your buddy will pass in his home.

Sorry to hear about your pain, it’s so hard to lose a good friend like a loved pet.

Just rolling down the road

[Soul ManParticipant 1856]

I had my weiner dog put down last January (2014).  He was 15 and I had him since he was about 6-8 weeks old.  He was a little obstinate bastard but I loved him.  But it was his time to go.  So I bought one of those “make your own garden stone decoration kits….basically some concrete you mix and pour in to a mold.  Well I put his footprints in the wet cement before taking him to the vet….spelled out his name with some decorative glass embedded below his prints.  Then I just held on to him a bawled like a baby as he drew his last breath and his heart beat for the last time.  I just stayed there for what seemed like 20 minutes and held him and cried my eyes out.  I don’t know if this is really advice…it’s been well over a year and I’m sitting here with tears in my eyes reliving it all.  I guess sometimes there’s just no easy answer to life.  Sometimes all you can do is brace yourself and weather the storm.  I honestly don’t know what else to offer…wish I could offer more man…I don’t do well with loss.

HISTORY...learn from it, memorize it, DON'T repeat it...

[Sam FisherParticipant 206]

Thanks for sharing your stories and advice guys, it’s greatly appreciated. The empathy I’ve seen on this forum whenever one of us is down is phenomenal, and outsiders have the audacity to call us a hate group.

Well, in a miraculous turn of events, it turns out that whatever was making my dog sick, has passed through his body, his kidneys have kicked into gear again (he was diagnosed with Acute Renal Disease) and he is acting as normal as can be again. He’s a little tired, but he chased my niece’s pet rabbit today, and is eating and drinking again. Pretty energetic for an ill 13 year old dog.

I left him at the vet to get 12 hours of drip, so any toxins in his blood would pass through his body and flush out when he urinates. The vet must have over-diagnosed him. When he first came back home, I decided to give it a long shot and mix him some pedialyte water – which is like flavorless Gatorade powder. Put some minute amounts of powder in his water, and he was sculling away like a pirate with a bottle of rum. Still weak that night, he had a long sleep, next day, picked up a little bit, didn’t eat, but still drank lots of this water. Later that night, he started eating again. Now, he’s pretty normal.

At this point, it’s just a matter of watching what he eats (low protein diet) and making sure he doesn’t hunt anymore wild rabbits or rats/mice, as they may have been poisoned. I believe it was either a stray rat, or the can of dog food which set his kidneys off to near complete failure.

Thank f~~~ for that.

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