Dad Going His Own Way

[Dark Ninja DaveParticipant 273]

Hi all

Been a while since I’ve posted, but something came up that has inspired me to write.

So I had a visit from my Dad yesterday, and the big news was that he and my mother are officially separating.
Classic “Grey Haired Divorce” situation here.

It doesn’t came as too much of a surprise really, I am not too shocked.
They haven’t been getting along for several years now, pretty much as soon as Dad retired and was spending more time at home; they would deliberately bait each other to start arguments at every opportunity.

The main problem for me is it changes the family dynamic quite a bit, as we don’t know where everyone is going to end up living.
Plus I’ll be committed to help move and use my place as temporary storage; a slight inconvenience.

Anyway, Dad says it’s mainly about disagreements over religion (he is a proclaimed atheist these days, where as Mum has always been quite religious), but I’m pretty sure it is about the money.

I haven’t always seen eye-to-eye with Dad.
But I have to acknowledge he has been a reasonably good role model, and has helped me a lot over the years.
He had a steady job, provided a stable environment for my siblings and I to grow up.
He had some side businesses to bring in extra money.
Even now, he helps me out with some home maintenance, and to pass on valuable practical and life skills.

Dad seems realistic about his future.
Planning on down-sizing and/or going “off the grid”.
I wish I could join him actually, but because of my son I am trapped in The Matrix for at least another 10 years or so…

So, yeah, I’m happy for him that he is able to go his own way now.
I wish him all the best.

Cheers,

DND

[AwakenedParticipant 35201]

You GO Dad, and Don’t Look Back or Find a Replacement Model !!!

In a World of Justin Beibers Be a Johnny Cash

[Max PowerParticipant 2721]

Same thing happened when my dad retired. They drove each other nuts and separated 20 years ago. They remained friends however and still are to this day.

Good luck to you and your family adjustments mate.

[CPT ObviousParticipant 2729]

So much for happily ever after…

My parents divorced after 32 years when I was 17. Divorcing late in life after that many years seems like so many wasted years. But seems to becoming a trend these days.

Hopefully he can find some peace and contentment going his own way.

"You don't know a woman till you have met her in divorce court."

[StealthParticipant 5335]

So it sounds like you value your dad… because he is a good provider?

"Once you’ve taken care of the basics, there’s very little in this world for which your life is worth deferring." -David Hansson. "It’s not when women are mean or nasty that anything is out of the ordinary. It’s when they are NICE to you that you have to be on high alert..." -Jackinov.

[bstoffParticipant 4863]

Too bad he can’t sign up at this site any more.
I guess you will have to share your account with him.

[iMickey503Participant 12465]

I’m not happy about it at all really. It f~~~ing sucks.. You work your ass off, and this is what you get. ITS ALL SO MUCH BULLS~~~!

You work your ass liek a f~~~ing whore, and this is what you get? Where the f~~~ is HIS RETIREMENT? When is she going to act like she gives a damn about all he sacrificed? I’m TRIED of women all of a sudden acting like c~~~s just because.

MEN as HUSBANDS GIVE IT ALL UP just to get f~~~ed over in the END? And to be treated like that? I’m telling you.. MARRIAGE SHOULD HAVE TERM LIMITS!

No REALLY! WHAT THE F~~~ DOES A MAN REALLY ASK FROM A WOMAN? What is her OH SO GOD LIKE SACRIFICE? Just f~~~ing DON’T DO IT EVER!

All these People out there saying don’t miss out on your chance of happiness? Where the f~~~ was that? BEFORE YOU GOT MARRIED THAT”S WHERE!

You are all alone. If you have been falsely accused of RAPE, DV, PLEASE let all men know about the people who did this. http://register-her.net/web/guest/home

[MonkParticipant 16988]

What’s the betting that the old bag will be straight onto a dating site?

[TaxGuyParticipant]

iMickey503 wrote:

I’m not happy about it at all really. It f~~~ing sucks.. You work your ass off, and this is what you get. ITS ALL SO MUCH BULLS~~~!

Agreed, but it’s important to keep pointing out. My grandparents were married for 75 years before they died and the roughest patch they had was when grandpa retired. Grandma was a stay-at-home, so she had a good run after the kids were grown where she was already retired. He assumed that she would want to spend a bunch of time with him. He was wrong. She was already a professional at being retired and had her hobbies and friends running full steam ahead. The wives had already formed their groups and there was no room for the men. That was the generation that didn’t believe in getting a divorce. We are passed those days.

While my divorce wasn’t my doing, I will admit that in my mind things needed to change once the kids got older or I was out of there. I would have packed up and moved out with my youngest when she goes off to college.

On the plus side, I only have three more payments until my alimony is paid in full. And she only got about 10 years worth of a pension that will have 30 years in when I retire. So instead of getting about 40% of that pension she only gets about 15%. And she still hasn’t found a better branch to land on. Sucks to be her.

Order the good wine

[Mr. SpockParticipant 10910]

iMickey503 wrote:

MARRIAGE SHOULD HAVE TERM LIMITS!

Marriage shouldn’t exist at all. It is an outdated concept that has outlived its usefulness.

Feminism isn't about equality with men, it's about leverage over men.

[GrumpyParticipant]

Dark Ninja Dave wrote:

It doesn’t came as too much of a surprise really, I am not too shocked.
They haven’t been getting along for several years now, pretty much as soon as Dad retired and was spending more time at home; they would deliberately bait each other to start arguments at every opportunity.

IMHO
It (divorce) never is really “a surprise”. It is an eventuality.
There will always be a reason for her unhappiness regardless of what her circumstances in life are. If she cant think of anything to be upset about, there are billions of outside influences that are more than willing to give her something to biatch about and lay blame at the feet of any man in “her” life whether she need to or not. Nothing is ever her “fault”.
Everything is never enough, the more you provide the more she wants. When you as a man interfere with “her stuff”, regardless of who paid for/acquired it for her, or who it actually belongs to, it is always her stuff.
At issue is that a man provided her “world” for her and now he has the time to participate in that world and she doesn’t want that because it’s her “world” dammit.

There was a time in my life when I gave a fuck. Now you have to pay ME for it

[SwimcatParticipant 3589]

Late in life divorce can often be a financial disaster, and their isn’t time to rebuild. Get divorced young, no how bad it is, at least there is time to start over and rebuild. Divorce late and the loss of savings and income can’t be recovered.

[OgreParticipant 5863]

If you can get your Dad through the initial hardpatch he’ll probably settle in and be happier than he’s been in a long time.

I can imagine time after social security folds where murder suicides and immolation on family court steps will become big news in these cases of grey divorce. Right now it’s inconvenient and hard to plan for, but going flat busted will create desperate people.

Congrats to your pops now he just needs to decide for himself what he wants to do each day.

I failed to realize in my youth that I was the prize. I was going to work. I was going to earn. Little did I realize that due to feminism, that no longer meant I had to share. Road soon, Desert after.

[bstoffParticipant 4863]

I would advise pops not to come into contact with mom after he gets his life back on track, and don’t tell mom how he is doing if she asks.
Women do not like to hear that their ex is happy after they’ve been set free.

[Sky-OParticipant 18936]

Swimcat wrote:

Late in life divorce can often be a financial disaster, and their isn’t time to rebuild. Get divorced young, no how bad it is, at least there is time to start over and rebuild. Divorce late and the loss of savings and income can’t be recovered.

Tru dat.

I got married when I was 27 then got divorced when I was 30 (no kids) and began the second phase of my life without having to deal with a parasite.

Made sure the break was a 50/50 split on assets and no future obligations on my part.

She just had to get remarried three years later and is now miserable (with two kids)

And the Sky-0 is living the dream.

[AutoliteParticipant]

iMickey503 wrote:

MARRIAGE SHOULD HAVE TERM LIMITS!

I felt that way 35 years ago! If I had said it back then they would have called me a freak…

[Dark Ninja DaveParticipant 273]

Thanks for all your comments!

And yeah, it’s a shame that there is a moratorium on new memberships.
In conversations since, it’s clear he’s definitely taken the red pill.
He even use the words “going his own way” to describe his next move.

Hang in there guys, and don’t take any s~~~!

Cheers

DND

[Author]

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