Career Advice for a Dumbass Before it's Too Late

[MR_ROBOTParticipant 23]

This is my first post, I could go on to describe all the ways women have wronged me, but pretty much all of it has already been said before. I’ve decided it would be more productive to ask for ideas on where to take my career, provide some background in the process, and hope that this post and the replies that follow are helpful to myself and other “young” men going their own way.

I’m 28, I live in the Seattle area. My interests are related to robotics specifically and technology in general. I graduated high school in 2007 and started at the University of Washington that fall. I took core classes related to engineering and industrial design, and dropped out after 1 year. I worked at Circuit City for a few months and then it went out of business. I went to a Community College and took drawing and graphic design classes in an attempt to build a portfolio on the cheap so I could get into the ArtCenter College of Design in California (Ferrari & Apple designers go there etc.) so I could have a good shot at becoming a quality industrial designer and not a starving artist.

During that time I realized my interests lie a bit more with technology and engineering than product design, as industrial design was heading the direction of graphic design and digital photography (taken over by women and manginas). At the time I desperately wanted to marry my analytical side with my artistic side, and I thought that User Interface Design (UX) was the best route. This was back in 2009 before UX was a term that could easily be found via Google. I asked school guidance counselors about my ideas but no one knew what I was talking about, trying to describe that I wanted to learn how to design user interfaces before 3D technology became common, so I could lay the groundwork on navigating 3D interfaces myself. At this point I realized that the University of Washington which I had previously attended was as good a school as any for trying to achieve this nebulous vision I had. Little did I know that UX would be common in 5 years time, and the UW would have programs specifically devoted to it.

I returned to UW in the fall of 2009 only to drop out at the end of the quarter. I had grown depressed after a girl wronged me, and I was heavily abusing marijuana to cope. This did not help my studies and (for me) meshed poorly with my difficult computer science and engineering classes. I was overwhelmed and under-prepared to begin with, although lucky to get back into a highly competitive school and field a second time. Being a Washington native and child of divorce (my mom remarried to the navy guy living next door to my parents house), I had been quite a mangina white knight for many years, and often buckled under almost any kind of real pressure.

I realize now I’ve started to include much more background than I intended. Long story short, I went on to work many different retail/service type jobs (Safeway, Home Depot, Best Buy), and a couple manufacturing jobs (roasting coffee in a plant, etc.) and attempted to return to college one more time at Western Washington University. I blew it once again, and spent some time homeless a couple times amongst all that. I must note that through all this I managed to stay relatively debt free, as I was lucky enough to have my father pay for my school until the money ran out.

All this culminated at my last job working as a salesperson at one of the “pot shops” that exist now in my state. I enjoyed that job, and worked very hard until I was promoted to a shift supervisor position. At that point I was disgusted with myself for squandering so many past opportunities. The business was dominated and run by women, and things kept heading south with the store over time. I made the mistake of letting one of my female coworkers know that I was looking for another job to get out of the industry, and she threw me under the bus and told my (female) boss in order to take my job. I was backed into a corner and forced to put my two weeks in.

At this point, my mom had recently passed away from Multiple Sclerosis. Her gradual decline had caused a lot of my depression over the years, and was one of the primary reasons for me doing poorly in college (if I were to blame something other than myself), other than my substance abuse which I used to mask my feelings of rejection from various young women over the years. When my mom died and I got a small inheritance from her, I walked out during the last couple days of my two weeks notice. I was finally able to buy myself a car, which I had lost during complications in a previous breakup.

That leads me to now. I have been out of work for a couple months, living off my dwindling inheritance, unsure what kind of work to take up to ensure a nice future and mildly enjoyable employment for myself. I’ve sworn off women, and have even stopped masturbating for the last month (which I plan to continue until I die). I have successfully quit cigarettes, marijuana, and drinking. I’ve also been doing bodyweight exercises in my apartment. I have been avoiding finding another job, because I’ve never wanted to work in retail in the first place (I don’t like people), and yet I keep resetting myself back to zero, giving myself no other choice since I can’t seem to build valuable skills outside of sales. I love computers and at this point I dream of going back and finishing my undergraduate degree in computer science and then getting a graduate degree to specialize into robotics, but I don’t know how to find a job that will pay enough for me to afford to work and go back to school. I’m not sure that is even a good plan, I would end up working for someone else the rest of my life, and I long for independence.

I have rambled for long enough. I would love to hear what you guys would do if you were 28 with only retail/sales/manufacturing work experience. Taking another retail job and taking out loans to go back to university to move towards robotics doesn’t seem like the best idea, even if not the worst. I considered doing car sales but my dad said they often don’t make much more than I was making managing at the pot shop. Going to a trade school seems lucrative, but ultimately boring to me (forgive me if this comes across as entitled). I’m just not much of a laborer, even though I’ve been stuck doing things much lower than that for a number of years. Any advice, or even criticism is welcome, I never write posts like this or ask for advice except from Google, so this is a bit of a message in a bottle for me.

TL;DR what would you do as next steps if you were 28, need a job, and only have retail and manufacturing experience? What should my 5-10 year plan look like?

[Solo MAN’S WisdomParticipant]

1. Welcome.
2. Lose the weed. It’s demotivating.
3. Buckle down and DO. WHAT’s. NECESSARY. For survival. Once you get on your feet then decide about something lifelong that you enjoy.
4. Sorry about your Mother. Just lost mine a few months ago, and its never easy.
5. Welcome, again.

S M W.

When women lead, destruction is the destination. -- Me.

[MR_ROBOTParticipant 23]

Good advice. The weed is gone. Actually all of my bad habits and friends are gone, I have a large void in my life right now that I need to fill with productive things beyond the reading and exercises that I’m doing now. Without money I can’t afford any hobbies, but it’s a good recipe for starting to teach myself programming.

Even among low level jobs, what would be recommended to stay away from women? I’m thinking I might try to get a position at the 3M plant down in the Tacoma area.

[Solo MAN’S WisdomParticipant]

Work. Just work. Do anything to earn a few $$ from pumping gas to yard work. ANYTHING. Then move up to a better gig. Learn everything you can.

I’m an employer. Trust me. If you are a punctual, reliable employee with even a half assed work ethic, you will be head and shoulders above most everyone else [especially the women].

If you really want to avoid women in the work place, become a garbage collector. I don’t see too many of them screeching about equality in that profession.

When women lead, destruction is the destination. -- Me.

[DocParticipant]

Give yourself time. Plenty of it.
First – you have the rest of your life to figure things out.
Take a job that distracts your mind enough to help ease the grieving process. It’s gonna take a few years to properly move through that process.
Read and expand your horizons further so to help formulate your thoughts about what you ultimately want to be doing.

Avoid all chemicals that alter your mood. Alcohol included until it’s safe to return in moderation.

Don’t say ‘Never’. Rub one out if need. No harm and therapeutic. You ain’t letting anyone down.

And did I say – TAKE YOUR TIME. BE KIND TO YOURSELF.

Stick around here too. We can guide as much as you need us to.

Good luck young brother.

The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape, finding oneself in the ranks of the insane. Marcus Aurelius

[MR_ROBOTParticipant 23]

Thanks Doc. What a blessing this forum is. Even better than ideas for work, you guys have helped me realize things I need to change within myself. The answers to my questions were already there. Regardless, I’m glad to have broken the seal on my first post, and must say again how grateful I am to have a warm welcome.

[PrincekieParticipant 1042]

Hi mate, I’ve been in the same boat as you. I was in my late twenties when the “Great Crash of 2008-09” hit, and I saw business after business going to the wall.

I agree with what the other guy said about making ends meet by doing whatever, however why not try to get a gig that would allow you to earn a wage and maybe take some night school classes to improve yourself and study something you’re interested in?

Just an idea: maybe go for the manufacturing job and take some classes in something that is well paid and has real shortages like CNC programming? You could do the course, whilst telling HR what you’re doing, which might help you get a job in that area?
Just some thoughts…

[MR_ROBOTParticipant 23]

Really great idea. Even without earning a degree, I could focus on taking classes that will give me real-world marketable skills, and maybe try to get some certifications. I haven’t had any luck finding “just a job” yet, but I’m still at it. I appreciate the reply and ideas. Sure hope I can at least find something to pay my bills soon, I was turned down by AT&T and Sprint for cellphone sales this week after taking their “psychological exam.” I was let down considering I passed a similar test just fine to work at Best Buy a couple years ago.

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