Adrift Soul Finally Spots Land

[WarfishParticipant 408]

Hey All,
Stumbled across this forum a couple of months ago, was lurking, and finally joined.
Been married for about 22 years, last 12 of which have been miserable. Constant beat down, can’t do anything right, always being accused of things, screamed at, etc. but just have been mindlessly plodding along…

Thought a new house would help which we closed on recently but it hasn’t. Demanding I hang pictures, curtains, molding, painting , and all before I get any of my stuff squared away.

Thankfully, a female coworker has helped me to see the light (She said obviously) you have been beat down and you shouldn’t take it. She has been supportive. She is separated – living states apart so she can relate a bit. Actually I kinda like her. Never to marry of course. Strangely (or maybe not really) one minute it seems like she is crazy about me and the next, wants nothing to do with me.

Anyway, because of her, I started planning an exit strategy and while doing research fond this place. I am sure glad I did because it sure is helping me with keeping my sanity and finding my soul again. Keep up the good work guys!

[FrostByteParticipant 19005]

Warfish wrote:

. Strangely (or maybe not really) one minute it seems like she is crazy about me and the next, wants nothing to do with me.

I would suspect she wants to help you but doesn’t want you to rebound onto her. So she may be doing you a favor.
Rebounding is your worst pitfall at this time because you have looked to your wife for emotional support you should have gotten with your marriage, for 22 years. It’s like pushing hard on a locked door. When door is gone you will fall hard forward. Question is, will you land on YOUR feet or at the foot of another woman.
Welcome to the forum.

If you rescue a damsel in distress, all you will get is a distressed damsel.

[TaxGuyParticipant]

Welcome home Warfish. While each story is unique, so many sound the same. Remember, if you want something you’ve never had you have to do something you’ve never done.

Order the good wine

[BlacqueJacqueShellacqueParticipant 6890]

Welcome to the forums Warfish. I hope you find more peace of mind as you read and share here.

[TuneoutParticipant]

Welcome to freedom ,brother.

Lifes a bitch,but you don't have to marry one!

[NerevarParticipant 8040]

Welcome, brother!

"One of the best things internet exposed is just how insane women are." - Freeman_K

[joetechParticipant]

Good luck, Warfish.

"Don't follow in my footsteps...I stepped in something."

[Anonymous 42]

Warfish wrote:

Strangely (or maybe not really) one minute it seems like she is crazy about me and the next, wants nothing to do with me.

Warfish, that’s BI-POLAR SUPREMO Dude! You’re stuck between two planets closing fast and I suggest you SLINGSHOT INTO HISTORY!

Dozy-doe GOTTA GO!<<<That would be my motto!

[JimBoLeaParticipant 1891]

greetings brother not lost but newly found.
Glad you found us in time.

LILITH IS THE HEAD SUCCUBUS AND SHE LIVES ON THE DARK SIDE OF THE MOON

[Binary LogicParticipant 2351]

Listen up Warfish, battle, you’ve got to focus. If you do plan, be sure to do it quietly, quickly and thoroughly. Also, be careful of the one that is giving you advice and allowing your to lean your thoughts on her. While nothing may come of it, if it’s in a professional environment and/or capacity in an organization, upon you’re exit, that may be fodder to be used against you. I’m not saying be paranoid, I’m saying be cautious. Welcome to the fold. So very glad to have you!

Funny, isn't it? How women thrive on a mans time, attention and resources, while simultaneously telling him he isn't enough...

[Anonymous 18]

Warfish wrote:

female coworker has helped me to see the light (She said obviously) you have been beat down and you shouldn’t take it. She has been supportive. She is separated – living states apart so she can relate a bit. Actually I kinda like her. Never to marry of course.

Stay married dude. Accept your fate as whipped and go back to the delusional existence.

Another woman living states apart who can ‘relate’ – you get divorced rest assured you will marry this woman who likely is a single mother.

Don’t be a chump. Kick her (the other woman) out of your life.

Find your testicles by reading as much as you can. Re-assess and see if you want to get divorced. But you’d be stupid to confide in another woman – she will manipulate you to think for her benefit all the while making you feel they were all your decisions to begin with.

Don’t fall for the trap. You are emotionally ignored by your wife and this woman is hoping to cash on some of the leftover goods (that is you after divorce).

She is playing you. You’d have more to lose than stay married and continue to be miserable.

[Solo MAN’S WisdomParticipant]

Anonymous wrote:

Stay married dude. Accept your fate as whipped and go back to the delusional existence.

Another woman living states apart who can ‘relate’ – you get divorced rest assured you will marry this woman who likely is a single mother.

Don’t be a chump. Kick her (the other woman) out of your life.

Find your testicles by reading as much as you can. Re-assess and see if you want to get divorced. But you’d be stupid to confide in another woman – she will manipulate you to think for her benefit all the while making you feel they were all your decisions to begin with.

Don’t fall for the trap. You are emotionally ignored by your wife and this woman is hoping to cash on some of the leftover goods (that is you after divorce).

She is playing you. You’d have more to lose than stay married and continue to be miserable.

iLearn is dead nuts correct. Start saying [& more importantly, meaning]”NO” Use it early and often in dealing with your wife. You will be surprised at the results.

When women lead, destruction is the destination. -- Me.

[The SavedParticipant 101]

Warfish wrote:

Anyway, because of her, I started planning an exit strategy…

Perhaps I’ve misunderstood? You should be doing this for YOURSELF, not ‘because of her’.

"A man's feelings are inconvenient to a woman's needs".

[Biggvs_DickvsParticipant 3725]

Warfish wrote:

Been married for about 22 years, last 12 of which have been miserable. Constant beat down,

S~~~, so sorry to hear that bro. You’re in the right place for help to a better life. Not gonna lie though – it’s not going to be easy. Getting out from under the marriage albatross is not easy.

It sounds like you already know what has to, or what will (one way or another) happen here. The only question it sounds like is how it will go down. There’s a lot of awesome advice here about how to get through this process with minimal carnage, but no matter what it’s pretty much never pretty.

Welcome home, we’re here to help. And start talking to lawyers today. Make sure they’re male, and talk to at least three before doing anything.

"Data, I would be delighted to offer any advice I can on understanding women. When I have some, I'll let you know." --Captain Picard,

[Biggvs_DickvsParticipant 3725]

It’s one of the weirdest ironies of life that the more you p~~~ a woman off, the more she’s into you sexually. I guess it’s because it has to do with the *intensity* of the emotion, not the actual emotion. That’s why women can be afraid of a man and at the same time HIGHLY sexually aroused by him.

Saying No more will definitely p~~~ her off, but it might actually get you laid more. Like I said – one of life’s weirdest ironies…

And take the advice about your female friend. That pretty much NEVER ends well, and her flakiness is a really really bad sign. That’s some straight up passive aggressive manipulation s~~~ right there – she’s conditioning you to accept her sudden and profound attitude changes toward you as normal.

Once you’ve accepted this as normal, as in “that’s just her personality I shouldn’t take it personally” blah blah <insert rationalization>, the next phase is for her to start using it as a control mechanism.

Just walk away from that s~~~. Trust us on that. When she starts asking you why you stopped talking to her (and she WILL, guaranteed) just tell her you’ve been busy.

"Data, I would be delighted to offer any advice I can on understanding women. When I have some, I'll let you know." --Captain Picard,

[CombatRollParticipant 2594]

You are adrift and I’ve been going down with the ship. We are in the same phase (I met with a lawyer Monday).

I’m at the 22 year mark in November. Sheesh – wish I’d ejected from this s~~~ a long time ago – No, I wish I’d never done it.

Stay strong and keep us posted. Like another posted suggested – be cautious and stealthy in your plans. Does she work? What state? Kids?

[Anonymous 43]

what female friend advocates breaking a marriage to a man?

A woman who wants to jump that man, getting her rival out of the way.

One woman at a time. Do not listen to this friend. She wants you and is willing to wreck your marriage further.

oh and never speak of this woman friend to your wife ever, like never ever.

Fix what you have, or at least mitigate the damage before it all implodes. Preemptive strike/total stealth move visit all the attorneys you can with the free consult. By doing this, you are technically that lawyer’s client, and can not represent your wife in divorce proceedings.

[bladeParticipant]

If you where down and out on the street this other bitch would want nothing to do with you.

A woman only looks for what is best for her not you.

Welcome to the brother hood

THE PLANTATION HAS NOW TURNED INTO THE KILLING FIELDS . WOMAN ARE NOW ROLLING CAMBODIAN STYLE .

[WarfishParticipant 408]

Wow, lots of excellent advice here. I greatly appreciate it.
Never considered my friend could be manipulating me. They are evil. I am going to reconsider that situation.

Ironically the wife says I am bipolar. But I really think she is, so does my brother and some of you guys.

I know I want out. I don’t think there is any fixing this sadly. BTW in FL. Have 3 kids, youngest will be 18 in a few weeks.

[WarfishParticipant 408]

Interesting reading going back to my intro. So where I am I at 9 months later? Well for starters red pill rage is really high, Due to my research here and a few other forums I have been busy planning/preparing for “not married”, in a few short days I will file and become a fulltime RV’r. I am also clearly seeing the matrix – all the evil women do, etc is just so obvious now.
Lastly, just want to mention my “work friend” has continued to be a good friend. While she genuinely appears to be a friend I am on constant watch for any evilness, monkey branching, and so on….

I will retro another update when things change

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