Home › Forums › MGTOW Central › A warning..for all those in love
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Won'tGetFooledAgain 4 years, 7 months ago.
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I wanted to take this opportunity to write to all of those young guys who are ‘in love’ and happen to make it here.
Unfortunately, most of you will not make it here. That’s because you are under a spell. But I really hope some of you will.
I am a married guy, married with two kids. I fell ‘in love’ 12 years ago in college with a very good looking girl and I then went on to marry her and did all the things that are required of a good man. I did all of it, earned a lot of money (I used to be a hedge fund trader until six months ago) , and finally I got made redundant.
And then, reality started to show.
After a lot of fights, it is becoming clear to me that a future together is only possible if I find another high paying job. But, what I have realized during this time of joblessness, is that a life without responsibilities is actually quite f~~~ing good. Why the hell would you want to sign up for a life where all you do is work your ass off so that your partner/wife/girlfriend can spend it? And if you don’t, they will make you feel guilty? Seriously?
The problem isn’t you… you are fine, you are a hard working guy who makes good money doing whatever you go.
If you decide to sign a marriage contract, you are f~~~ing yourself…literally. Did you ever dream of walking down the isle when you were a kid? No, you dreamed of being an astronaut or a sports legend or the f~~~ing President etc. Only girls dream of getting married and having kids. So when you get married, you only fulfill one persons’s dreams.. yup that’s the girl. And that trend will continue… you will basically spend your life fulfilling her needs while you get one blow job a year.
That, my friends, is what marriage is going to be like.
Don’t do it. Please, don’t do it.
My life is f~~~ed and I’m cutting my losses and dealing with it but you don’t need to do it.
If your girlfriend looks like she is the real deal, then f~~~ her, get her to suck your dick, because once you sign that contract, you aren’t getting any fun anymore..it’s over. It will be done just to keep you going. Face it, women only want to trap a man, that’s basically it, sometimes it is for money, sometimes it is because they find a nice guy who treats them nice. But it is NEVER a mutually beneficial relationship.
So please, I don’t want to bore you with my life’s problems. I just want to warn some of you so that you don’t f~~~ your life up. The biggest problem most men have today is that they think their current girlfriend is ‘not like that’. Well, in time, you will see.
Good luck.
gametrader: excellent advice.
personally, i think it is pretty simple. estrogen is one of the most potent and deadly chemicals in the world. near indefensable for young men. after it casts it spell for enough time, men adapt over years of prolonged exposure. then just about the time men figure it out, the next wave of yokes and burdens are right there with the moms and grandmas coaching away to basically kill you and your dreams forever. hard to get young guys to see this but some here already got the hint and many more to come i hope.
I’m at 26 now, and haven’t been married. I feel so much more at peace. I was walking to my apartment just a few minutes ago and heard a baby wailing and crying, and the only thought that came to mind was “wow, I’m glad I don’t have to put up with that with someone…” That’s not me putting the child at fault, most certainly not. It’s that it involved two people to make that baby who will inevitably get sick of each other and separate, if they haven’t already.
My sister had a son at 17, and she’s not had it too terribly hard because she has had financial help from my mother to go to school so she can get a better job to raise the child with her boyfriend. I’m unable to afford school, but I know I don’t have to spend on anyone else and I can save what I have to either go to school or start a business soon (which I’m highly considering, to be honest…if I can ever get the finances to do it).
@gametrader, I’m more than willing to read out your life story on here and let you vent. I don’t know if you have anyone to go to about this personally (I sure as heck don’t), but I’ve come to learn this page is full of people who are among the most understanding yet logical people, and I only joined about a week and a half ago.
I still admit that I struggle with the temptations to pursue a girl (like every other close male friend of mine is), but I know ultimately that this decision is for the better.
@gametrader: Preach it brother.
And while you are preaching to mostly the choir, these stories need to be told over and over again. Why? Because it is reassuring to know that we are not the only ones experiencing these things, and we see the game for what it is. It needs to be said for the people lurking — men on the fence about MGTOW, men felling trapped, men feeling pressured to get married and conform to the gynocentric model, men going through hell wondering what-the-hell-is-wrong-me when it is not them but a system that is stacked against them, and for women who are gathering intel on us. Your bulls~~~ has been revealed.
"You don't know a woman till you have met her in divorce court."I still admit that I struggle with the temptations to pursue a girl (like every other close male friend of mine is), but I know ultimately that this decision is for the better.
Yeah sometimes that happens to me, I just have to remind myself of the reality.
If your girlfriend looks like she is the real deal, then f~~~ her, get her to suck your dick, because once you sign that contract, you aren’t getting any fun anymore..it’s over. It will be done just to keep you going. Face it, women only want to trap a man, that’s basically it, sometimes it is for money, sometimes it is because they find a nice guy who treats them nice. But it is NEVER a mutually beneficial relationship. So please, I don’t want to bore you with my life’s problems. I just want to warn some of you so that you don’t f~~~ your life up. The biggest problem most men have today is that they think their current girlfriend is ‘not like that’. Well, in time, you will see. Good luck.
Pay attention young fellas! THIS IS THE UNMITIGATED TRUTH!
HISTORY...learn from it, memorize it, DON'T repeat it...Each time when one of my courtships failed, I wondered why. What I failed to realize at the time is what might have happened to me had it worked out. It usually was a case of: “Be careful what you with for. You might just get it.”
Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
–H. L. MenckenSociety asks MGTOWs: Why are you not making more tax-slaves?
Gametrader,
thanks for that post. it demonstrates something I’ve always advised: if you think your woman really cares about you and not just what you can do for her, take the money out of the equation and see how much she still cares about you. Remove the money and then look to whatever you have as indicators about how much she cares about you.‘trader, sorry to hear this is happening to you. The one thing I can offer you, which I’ve posted about in other threads before, is this: while your wife may not be happy right now that you are not earning for her as much as you did, you are the ONLY man who is willing to earn for her at all, now that she has been married and has kids. She can divorce you, and may well threaten to do it if she hasn’t already. If she does, it can be financially disastrous for you. But it won’t financially kill you. You will still have the ability to earn. Keep this in mind for a minute…I’ll come back to it.
If she divorces you, she will probably get the kids, house etc. She will ask for and get child support, and will likely want alimony for a while as well if you live in a state that has it. In short, she can take about everything you’ve earned so far. If she threatens to do all this, acknowledge right to her face that she has that option, because she does. do not beg her not to do it. Do not challenge her or dare her to do it. Acknowledge to her right to her face as calmly as you can that that she can take all of that. BUT THAT IS ALL SHE CAN TAKE! She cannot take what is not there.
When the intensity of the conversation has worn off, remind her calmly that when the divorce is over and finalized, she will have a pile of tax free assets, but almost certainly not enough to finance the rest of her life. If you have kids under 18, I’ll estimate she has several decades remaining to live. What the divorce will not provide her is enough assets to finance her for the rest of her life.
You have skills and experience and a work ethic that you can use to feed yourself for the rest of your life. What will she have? A divorce settlement and child support… This is not enough. Child support does not last forever. She can pay bills with a divorce settlement, but probably not forever. What will she do for money to pay bills in about 20 years when the child support has long since run out? This may seem like a long way off, but it IS coming and it IS inevitable. Remind her of that…
Also remind her that there is no one really standing in line to take your place. She can choose to be a 30 something or a 40 something divorcee with 2 kids, but among all the other men out there, I will tell you on behalf of all of us that none of us is waiting to take your place to earn for her. In fact, feel free to save and show her this post and let her read it (directly from me to her).
To your wife: I’m one of the fortunate, securely employed single men out here that you may think you can replace your husband with. But, I and my similarly situated single male brothers are not. We see women like you all the time, especially when there’s economic instability… 30 something and 40 something single mothers with champagne tastes and beer keg wages looking for the next man to support you. It’s like a conga line. I can bounce from one of you to the next week after week and never get to the end of the line. Why would I adopt you and your bills? You think you’re special? What do you have to offer me…?… every other weekend when you don’t have your kids? Aside from the line of other divorced single mothers behind you, there is a near unlimited supply of childless women younger and better looking than you… all also looking for a man with a job. You don’t like going to the gym? Too bad. You’re going to need to like it in order to keep up with those younger women. You don’t like blow jobs? Too bad. You’re going to learn to like them again, only this time it will be for a man who doesn’t care about you nearly as much as your husband does. You don’t like waiting tables? Too bad. Go to Denny’s at 3am tomorrow morning and see who’s waiting to take your order… It will not be a man like your husband. It will be a woman whose child support ran out, who overestimated her own marketability, and who wishes she still had one. Your husband is the only man who’s ever demonstrated a willingness to earn for you. At this point, you are in NO position to believe you can find another one.
Sorry to be so blunt trader. But your wife needs to know that the unpleasant reality she’s threatening you with is not the only unpleasant reality there is that will result from a divorce. Women are short sighted and she should probably needs to be reminded of this at some point. Remind her yourself, or refer her to this thread. The divorce settlement just does not last forever, and the supply of men willing to earn for her is already down to only one.
Remember when I said I’d come back to it. You won’t be financially killed by a divorce if it happens. You will still have the ability and skills to earn, even if the opportunity is temporarily unavailable the way it previously was. That will pay bills, that will last for the rest of your life, and you will not have to wait tables at Dennys at 3am in order to do it. She’s the one on the dead end path, not you.
Look, it's not my fault that tornado dropped a house on your sister. Now get back on your broom and get your ass out of here... and take your monkeys with you
Well said BrainPilot, I can vouch for that, because I am the divorced guy that’s rebuilding my life, and watching other divorced men rebuilding theirs. It’s tough at first, but we all keep earning, and moving forward. Whereas the women just seem to stagnate, and end up alone or with bums. The amount of women available is quite surprising, it’s a bit different for me because I haven’t had kids, but gametrader you’ve had your kids, opened your eyes, so you are free to choose your own destiny.
Gametrader, I wish you all the best and hope you find contentment or freedom, whatever path you choose, as long as your going your own way, you’re going in the right direction.When the war cemeteries are half full of the corpses of dead conscripted women, only then will women have earned the right to speak of equality. Sidecar “A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do.” - Bob Dylan
Brainpilot is 1000% correct on all points!
Out of my High School graduating class, I am one of 2 men that never got married.
EVERY OTHER MALE CLASSMATE IS NOW DIVORCED, PAYING CHILD SUPPORT AND ALIMONY!
Every female classmate got married, every single one of them got a divorce too!
Three of the divorced female classmates are on their second and third husbands, they were able to “trade up” because they were the “beauty queens”.
The rest scrape by on minimum wage jobs and/or social services.
My brother is “in love” and is looking to get married if the relationship holds up. He is “in love” with a girl he works with. She is a preacher’s daughter and comes from a large family.
This girl had one or two prior relationships and gives the appearance of being level headed. They have been friends for 2-3 years.
My parents, especially mother, are so “welcoming” when she visits on the weekends that it causes him humiliation. My mother wants him to marry the girl. My father reads all the preachers/her father’s spiritual books along with my brother. He is joining her father’s church.
I “think” he is f~~~ed. But that is just my opinion. Why? Hypergamy.
You see this girl is the type that got what she wanted. She comes from a family with influence. She has been to Italy. Goes to an expensive college. You get the picture.
She will be a teacher in a few years with a bachellor’s, while my brother will be a bartender still. He has no degree so his best option would be to become a manager, but he is too young for that. And even if that happened his earning potential would not be too high.
Add to the fact both are in their early twenties. And she is an American in America.
My brother does not have the strongest of character either. It is not uncommon for him to be accused of “effeminate” qualities.
I think she will dump him in the long run. But that is my opinion. I really don’t know how to deal with him simply because the only argument I have is theoretical, as in I do not know the girl that well.
I fell in love once. Then the woman tried to use that love manipulate me and after that I just ignored my emotions and became the stronger person I am today.
I'm married to the game,but she broke her vows.
What will she do for money to pay bills in about 20 years when the child support has long since run out? This may seem like a long way off, but it IS coming and it IS inevitable. Remind her of that… Also remind her that there is no one really standing in line to take your place. She can choose to be a 30 something or a 40 something divorcee with 2 kids, but among all the other men out there, I will tell you on behalf of all of us that none of us is waiting to take your place to earn for her. In fact, feel free to save and show her this post and let her read it (directly from me to her).
Great post BrainPilot, lots of great points made!
I’m not in total agreement with reminding her of anything though, I wouldn’t waste the time to educate her at all, I wouldn’t even attempt to teach her any lessons, in fact I would take pleasure in watching her go into the abyss completely unaware.
If she doesn’t appreciate it, and she wants a divorce, she gets it. I wouldn’t do anything to help her whatsoever, that’s the next guy’s job.
Just some thoughts, cheers boys
Because in order to be able to think, you have to risk being offensive.
….most of you will not make it here. That’s because you are under a spell. But I really hope some of you will.
..thanks for writing this
There have been moments that I’ve also drifted under the spell and I have almost been sightly jealous of a couple of my buddies who have cute wives. I see them a few times each year, usually when we go biking together.
Then, I quickly resurface to reality and realize that I have no idea what really goes on behind closed doors; maybe they are miserable at times.
I get back to clear thinking and remember exactly why I’ve been avoiding relationship for two decades.
Your excellent post reminded me that as I sit here this evening in total peace and quiet ..those people in the relationships that seem to have it all, might possibly be ..not so happy ..as one sometimes imagines.I would say, it does appear, that even if hypergamy didn’t exist during marriage, a guy losing his job and moving down the economic scale will make a woman he is married to appear increasing affected by hypergamy. This would be particularly true, in the case where she is dependent on the money the man was brining in.
"I am my own thang. Any questions?" - Davis S Pumpkins.
If your girlfriend looks like she is the real deal, then f~~~ her, get her to suck your dick, because once you sign that contract, you aren’t getting any fun anymore..it’s over. It will be done just to keep you going. Face it, women only want to trap a man, that’s basically it, sometimes it is for money, sometimes it is because they find a nice guy who treats them nice. But it is NEVER a mutually beneficial relationship.
Thank you for sharing your story.
Because in order to be able to think, you have to risk being offensive.
For richer or for richer, til death do us part
"It seems like there's times a body gets struck down so low, there ain't a power on earth that can ever bring him up again. Seems like something inside dies so he don't even want to get up again. But he does."
Well said BrainPilot, I can vouch for that, because I am the divorced guy that’s rebuilding my life, and watching other divorced men rebuilding theirs. It’s tough at first, but we all keep earning, and moving forward. Whereas the women just seem to stagnate, and end up alone or with bums. The amount of women available is quite surprising, it’s a bit different for me because I haven’t had kids, but gametrader you’ve had your kids, opened your eyes, so you are free to choose your own destiny. Gametrader, I wish you all the best and hope you find contentment or freedom, whatever path you choose, as long as your going your own way, you’re going in the right direction.
My divorce becomes final in exactly 2 weeks, and I am one of these guys rebuilding my life. I have been stashing money since we split and I have 8 months take home salary tucked away in an untraceable account. Once the divorce has settled and I have saved a bit more, I am going to be buying a property on my own. I will be totally free to do whatever I want, whenever I want and will be able to spend my money on stuff I want instead of meals out and pointless s~~~ for her.
The best part is I can stay home eating takeaway food, listening to Pink Floyd, playing Call of Duty and watching porn all weekend if I so wish. I no longer have to waste my money on holidays and evenings out just to keep her entertained because she is bored. Holidays to me have always just been a massive cost as I had to pay for everything while she moaned and basically said “entertain me!”
I have spent the last year on dating sites and that has been the best education I could have ever hoped for. I know there is an unlimited supply of women out there for entertainment and sex when I get bored. The girl I am currently hooking up with wants to organise a FFM 3some so that will be the number one item on my bucket list crossed off!
Basically life looks pretty good, I really think getting divorced has been the best thing to happen to me after making the stupid mistake of getting married. I am now free to do whatever I want, whenever I want, with whoever I want. A vasectomy is next on the list so no women can “accidentally” fall pregnant and expect to sit on her arse for the next 18 years while I support her.
I think men get married as they are terrified of being on their own and never getting sex again. Basically embrace being on your own as it is pretty f~~~ing amazing!
For women, everything eventually boils down to Alpha Fucks, Beta Bucks.
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