So now that we’re both likely to get drawn into the hell of some feminist tribunal known as HR, is there anything either of us can say that these idiots will understand? Or should I simply spend the weekend piecing together an outfit that best shows off a moose knuckle so I can also scream that I’m offended when someone obviously looks?

A desperation tactic would be to play the homosexual card so that you could argue that you were not buying what she was selling. Drop buzzwords like “hostile work environment”, “sexual advances”, &c and it just might fly.

Nonsense like this is why I will never work in a formal job. It is beneath a free man’s dignity to be a tax mule. It is as if females take a s~~~ on your heads and cry to the nearest white knight when you take notice.

I agree with playing the “I’m Gay” card, as it is absolutely useless to try to reason with women.

The other option would be to plead on your knees, apologize and kiss some ass.

Personally, i wouldn’t put up with that crap, and i’d just let them fire me. but then again, i’ve been unemployed for nearly twice as long as that i’ve been employed. SOOOOooo… i might not be the best guy to be giving advise in this matter 😛

“You had me waste three whole hours driving up the valley for this?  I work in a remote office.  I’m the only one there.  Half the time I work from home.  I resent the implication that I might harass anyone.  Now I have real work to do, and this isn’t getting it done, and neither is your complete waste of time seminar.  Good day.  And good bye.”

I never heard from them again.

F~~~ HR.

I’m sure the women you mention can’t “wait [sounds like weight] to GAIN a new perspective” “after all, you can’t have your cake and eat it, but maybe you can NOW” the possibilities are endless. I had a situation in the past where a woman was being a pain in the ass, I told her when no one was around that if she didnt knock it off I would hypnotise her and make her gain weight. It was amazing how quickly her behaviour improved. logic and reasoning doesn’t work with women. anything that affects their vanity appears pretty effective

Just tell them that the bitch in question propositioned you, you refused her advances, and now she is trying to persecute you for rejecting her.

If there were no witnesses, then it’s simply his word against hers and neutralized. Your friend is in very a precarious position. HR can do everything from issuing a warning and even up to firing him over this. He has nothing to lose using Soul Man’s stratagem.

One of my friends, who worked at a mega-corp chain, got fired for using the word spade while showing a group of employees an assembly of garden spades on a rack. He said “a spade is a spade” speaking strictly in the garden tool sense. A female complained to HR, and he was terminated for literally talking about garden tools.

Never underestimate HR, or ever assume they are on your side. The represent the company and its interests, period. I think Soul Man’s suggestion fights fire with fire and would muddy the waters enough to save your friend. I proffered the spade firing story only to demonstrate just exactly the level of inanity HR can reach.

Of course, bulls~~~ like this is what keeps me self-employed whenever someone tries to offer me a corporate job as my skills are in high demand. Soul Man that is sheer genius.

@AnyHRLurkers: Here’s a big fat f~~~ you to all of human resources everywhere! You are nothing but a bunch of room temperature IQ droolers. I also forgot to mention that no one likes obese, hairy and bossy feminist women with bad attitudes that seem to make up the ranks of this joke you try to call a profession. It’s a profession just as much as being a burger flipper is so have at it wenches. I’m staring at titties and asses too, and there is nothing you can do to me for I am MGHOW. Bite me!!!

That rant was for the friend above and another friend whose ex was a 6 figure making feminist HR drone that jailed him multiple times over 10 years and got him stripped of his drivers license for failing to pay child support thereby making it impossible to pay child support. He is financially wrecked to this day though free of child support. She lives in a nice two story house on a desirable island. He lives in a hovel.

Implement BrainPilot/Soul Man stratagem. He’d need one who specializes in employment law.

Tell them the truth! Like a guy lining his sights on an AR! You didn’t “see” the “deer” until you focused past the rifle sight! Concentration can not be proved or disproved! Your focus was totally occupied in thought, correct? You’re “concentration” was not on “anatomy” but rather locked in thought! correct?

I’d get a boner on just to bump that bitch! By “accident” of course! Watch the look on her face then! She would probably like it! Smack that ass in the paper closet! Watch all the chickens line up to get f~~~ed! You’ll be like an open bag of chicken feed!