So last night, I went out with a buddy who I am taking under my wing a bit as he is in his early twenties (I am 31) and hopefully giving him a bit of self esteem as a mentor, as well as teaching him of MGTOW and red pill philosophy, etc.  When his girlfriend left him a few months ago (won’t go into circumstances) most of his friends basically did very little to “pick him up” emotionally.  It was at this point we were around a house “pre drinking” before going into town and everyone was being fairly boring and decided they didn’t want to go out in the end – this young lad was basically ignored. So I told him “we are going out” and I basically bought him his drinks and provided a shoulder to cry on / opportunity to speak about the situation and I passed on my experience and wisdom to him.

So anyway, several months on and we come to last night.  Went to one of the larger bars in town to start.  We queued up and I could hear behind me some girl was pretty much pushing her way through the queue – physically but also emotionally by thrusting her t~~~ and apparent “pretty” face about.  So, I am at the bar close to getting served next and I pretty much stone-wall her.  She gets to me and says “I can get you served quicker.” I pretty much ignore her.  Then she turned to my buddy and went through a whole repertoire of “manipulation” techniques:

“You look like a nice guy, not like your RUDE friend blocking the bar there…”

“Is your RUDE friend the leader of your group?”

“Do you have a girlfriend? You seem like the sort of guy that would be kind to a girl.”

After that, my buddy responded “I don’t want a girlfriend – they are too much hard work for little reward.”

Inside, I am grinning and feeling proud of him – he had the moral courage to stand up for himself.  She replies:

“Oh, well, doesn’t matter because I have a boyfriend of 2 years and I don’t really care what I say because it doesn’t matter.”

After that, she basically started being verbally abusive and I just laughed.  Not ONCE did I even look at her.  My friend told me after that apparently, he could see the “hamster wheel” spinning when she couldn’t work out why I was ignoring her and how her attempts were failing – her resorting to pushing RIGHT next to me as soon as the guy next to me got served.

I had my drinks served and then, once I paid for them, I told the bartender “that chap there was after me and has been queuing as long as I have.”

This girl went into RAGEMODE.  I can’t remember the exact expletives, but the last thing I heard was her telling her girlfriends “I will make sure he gets picked up by the police later tonight.”  Followed by her nudging into me.

So, me and my friend moved off and of course, debriefed the whole interaction – the self entitlement of this silly girl was outrageous and this sort of behaviour reinforces my MGTOW ways.  However, this is where the “sad” bit comes in.

This morning I wake up and feel a mixture of emotions.  A remnant of blue-pillism made me wonder if I was really being a rude bastard and just trying to prove a point, the red pill dose reinforced how ridiculous some women are and that not being “manipulated” by her was a good thing (for me at least.)  I am also annoyed, however, that this sort of behaviour is much more commonplace in the world.

My “natural” instinct, as I imagine many of us here have, is one of seeking companionship with the opposite sex.  The idea of it is fantastic, but with so many s~~~ women around, the prospects are just woeful.  I feel sorry for that girls boyfriend for putting up with her for two years.  I wouldn’t tolerate that sort of behaviour.

My logical side sees the reality of the world and is (mostly) my dominant psyche aspect.  The logic of “women have very little to offer me in a relationship” battles the emotional (and biological) desire for QUALITY companionship.  Right now, MGTOW is saving my sanity, bank account and maintains my freedom, but it’s also feeling a bit lonely.  Such a shame that relationships can’t be free of drama and bollocks and just be filled with good times.

Does anyone else have this internal “conflict” – they are dominantly MGTOW but, deep down there is that gnawing desire for quality companionship?

I look forward to hearing others thoughts and experiences.

Sometimes I think it’d be nice to find a girlfriend, then I look around and go on a few dates and realize I was being stupid again.

That’s pretty much my sentiment also – my logic knows this, it’s just a shame that the biology and natural instinct rears its ugly head sometimes.

That’s pretty much my sentiment also – my logic knows this, it’s just a shame that the biology and natural instinct rears its ugly head sometimes.

hehe, yep. Happens to me sometimes aswell.

And at the same time, that same biology gave you the means to think. Don’t be miserable over it, accept the dual nature of how you think, even when its so polar. It’s natural.

Think and define yourself.

Think about the day you had. Go to bed and the next day, live again.

You will be alright.  We are not the first or last thinking people, with everything good and ugly what comes out of it 🙂

And at the same time, that same biology gave you the means to think. Don’t be miserable over it, accept the dual nature of how you think, even when its so polar. It’s natural.

Fermat wrote:

Im honestly too inside my own head a lot to really be sensitive to a woman’s needs. It’s not that I don’t care it’s that I don’t usually have the energy or desire to care about what some female stranger is doing.

Interesting thoughts, guys.  Thank you.

@fermat – In terms of myself, I would also say that 99% I am quite selfish and I am usually fine with that / accept that’s my nature.  The tiny 1% occasional blip of blue pill thinking makes me think that I have lots to share.  This then usually gets quelled with the generalised thought process of “most people are ungrateful when you share anyway, so I may as well not bother.”

Apologies in advance for the long windedness. So last night, I went out with a buddy who I am taking under my wing a bit as he is in his early twenties (I am 31) and hopefully giving him a bit of self esteem as a mentor, as well as teaching him of MGTOW and red pill philosophy, etc. When his girlfriend left him a few months ago (won’t go into circumstances) most of his friends basically did very little to “pick him up” emotionally. It was at this point we were around a house “pre drinking” before going into town and everyone was being fairly boring and decided they didn’t want to go out in the end – this young lad was basically ignored. So I told him “we are going out” and I basically bought him his drinks and provided a shoulder to cry on / opportunity to speak about the situation and I passed on my experience and wisdom to him. So anyway, several months on and we come to last night. Went to one of the larger bars in town to start. We queued up and I could hear behind me some girl was pretty much pushing her way through the queue – physically but also emotionally by thrusting her t~~~ and apparent “pretty” face about. So, I am at the bar close to getting served next and I pretty much stone-wall her. She gets to me and says “I can get you served quicker.” I pretty much ignore her. Then she turned to my buddy and went through a whole repertoire of “manipulation” techniques: “You look like a nice guy, not like your RUDE friend blocking the bar there…” “Is your RUDE friend the leader of your group?” “Do you have a girlfriend? You seem like the sort of guy that would be kind to a girl.” After that, my buddy responded “I don’t want a girlfriend – they are too much hard work for little reward.” Inside, I am grinning and feeling proud of him – he had the moral courage to stand up for himself. She replies: “Oh, well, doesn’t matter because I have a boyfriend of 2 years and I don’t really care what I say because it doesn’t matter.” After that, she basically started being verbally abusive and I just laughed. Not ONCE did I even look at her. My friend told me after that apparently, he could see the “hamster wheel” spinning when she couldn’t work out why I was ignoring her and how her attempts were failing – her resorting to pushing RIGHT next to me as soon as the guy next to me got served. I had my drinks served and then, once I paid for them, I told the bartender “that chap there was after me and has been queuing as long as I have.” This girl went into RAGEMODE. I can’t remember the exact expletives, but the last thing I heard was her telling her girlfriends “I will make sure he gets picked up by the police later tonight.” Followed by her nudging into me. So, me and my friend moved off and of course, debriefed the whole interaction – the self entitlement of this silly girl was outrageous and this sort of behaviour reinforces my MGTOW ways. However, this is where the “sad” bit comes in. This morning I wake up and feel a mixture of emotions. A remnant of blue-pillism made me wonder if I was really being a rude bastard and just trying to prove a point, the red pill dose reinforced how ridiculous some women are and that not being “manipulated” by her was a good thing (for me at least.) I am also annoyed, however, that this sort of behaviour is much more commonplace in the world. My “natural” instinct, as I imagine many of us here have, is one of seeking companionship with the opposite sex. The idea of it is fantastic, but with so many s~~~ women around, the prospects are just woeful. I feel sorry for that girls boyfriend for putting up with her for two years. I wouldn’t tolerate that sort of behaviour. My logical side sees the reality of the world and is (mostly) my dominant psyche aspect. The logic of “women have very little to offer me in a relationship” battles the emotional (and biological) desire for QUALITY companionship. Right now, MGTOW is saving my sanity, bank account and maintains my freedom, but it’s also feeling a bit lonely. Such a shame that relationships can’t be free of drama and bollocks and just be filled with good times. Does anyone else have this internal “conflict” – they are dominantly MGTOW but, deep down there is that gnawing desire for quality companionship? I look forward to hearing others thoughts and experiences.

Can you take me under your wing? It would be so awesome to have you as a mentor…the three of us could be MGTOW wingmen!

Tried to use you to push her way to the front of the line and then cussed you out when you didn’t play ball,
Tried to use your friend to the same end while cussing you out to him within earshot of you
Tried pulling the “do you want a girlfriend I have a boyfriend (assuming he even exists of course)” routine on said friend
Went apes~~~ and threatening to get you arrested (for what exactly) when you pointed out the next customer who’d had the decency to wait in line to the bartender over her.

Personally I think you were very restrained in how you dealt with the self entitled little c~~~ and you certainly have nothing to be ashamed of.

Personally I feel a similar way to you, although I would not refer to what you’re experiencing as a conflict. Like yourself I would dearly love to meet one of these “strong, independent women” that feminism promised me while growing up. But I’ve yet to meet one and I doubt I ever will, in the meantime I refuse to let the dross that is on offer make me feel bad, between work, friends and hobbies I’ve too much going on in my life to ever feel lonely and I would rather live the rest of my life alone than settle for the self entitled little c~~~ you describe or anyone like her.

The thing is that during those years I grew up, a lot.  I went from being 27-ish to 35-ish, from being “kinda on the right track” to being “successful”.  During that time all I wanted to do was learn how to be myself. I wasn’t trying to meet someone, I wasn’t trying to impress women, I didn’t respond to the occasional flirtatious smile or touch, I just did my own thing.

When I eventually decided the time was right to meet someone I “put myself out there” and started dating, and absolutely hated how it made me feel. I just couldn’t be myself, and always felt like I had to put on an act on some level – most likely because the women I was meeting were also, obviously, putting on an act themselves.

So now I still have that deep-seated desire for companionship, and yes, it can feel a bit lonely at times.  But I can tell you unequivocally that I felt worse when I was out there trying to “play the numbers” (the whole mindset and strategy involved is so unappealing to me) in order to find someone worth spending quality time with.

I’m doing some camping in a few weeks, and I just bought a Hennessy Hammock for the trip.  I’m going to hop on my mountain bike now and take a ride through the woods and practice setting it up.  It would be cool to have someone to share the planning and the trip itself with, but the experience is going to be great regardless.  I’m just enjoying life, and not making companionship a precondition to that enjoyment.  If I cross paths with someone eventually, so be it, but I’m done with “putting myself out there”. I’m done with wondering if there is any deeper meaning to life if only there was someone else around to share it all with.