Good Luck!

Eventually, though, I’d simply go wherever and whenever I pleased.  If we crossed paths, I’d make sure to ignore her.

It’s impossible for me to run into any of THEM 7 years later when I’m in a different county that has like 1.2 million people living here. I guess I’m just lucky. And I didn’t really have any “old haunts” back when I was in that relationship except HER house…and mine. LOL.

Your options: A) Avoid old haunts. You’re tired, it’s the end of the day, you choose to not add to today’s challenges, etc. B) don’t acknowledge their presence. C) Smile, nod, continue on in silence. D) While time’s not a factor, write down (to discard) ten responses to what you can right now think of as their toughest question: this tunes up your skillset 10 reps slow now, done on a few occasions, and you’ll be coming up with at least one or two great responses when under a limited time to answer.

E.g.  “Gee SJUR, whhyyhee did you do Kimburly so wrong? Explain yourself! She wouldn’tuh ‘shot your dog’ unless you did her wrong!”    Answers 1-10 [[help me out here guys]] [[DO NOT break eye contact with her]] may include:   1Yeah, you’re right, I shouldn’t have painted my car bright red, that should’ve been spent on restaurants with her.    2 EFF you, you effing eff, it’s none on your business.  3WHen did you  talk to her last?[[who cares]] How’s she doin? [[less well than if she’d stuck with you]]What’s she been up to? [[you don’t care, but it’s a filler]]  4I’m kinda missin her, could you please tell her to kiss my ass? 5So what’ve you been up to? 6Hey how’s it goin?–if you can tell she’s about to “start in” (it’s like if a cat bites you, the last thing they expect you to do is shove that hand right through the back of their throat) 7 How’s Ted doing? …Ted’s her ex, and you’ve as much a right to this info as she does to be asking questions.  8Hey, it’s been GReat talking with you I gotta go. She says “to do what?” smile and continue down the aisle. 9What’s the minimum temperature  to cook this chicken so it’s safe?[[to hit you over the head with]] 10 How long do you and her “go back”? 11Do you know where the kitty litter is? 12why do you want to know?

E) anticipate questions, ask ’em first, follow up asking: how/why/when/where/who/what?  The one asking the questions controls the conversation.     If need be, yin and yang her via don’t let them go, feign true interest in asking one question after another, keep them answering if you tire, look at your watch, “crap, sorry, gotta go, take care.”    “you’re busy and have things to do,  oh you don’t, well I do.”

IMO if she’s got “many” close friends, this means you did the right thing. She should’ve been focusing on the friendship of her relationship with you.       This whole ‘gal pal’ mentality:             there’s no “pack” if you don’t give a s~~~ about what they say to each other.

   mm yummy

stop giving them so much control over you

I agree, you’re going to “cross paths”, she may even be doing it on purpose to see your reaction, and to jerk your chain.

I struggled with the same situation, I forced myself to “not react”, and seem bored and uninterested, like I didn’t give a s~~~.

Eventually, I didn’t have to act, I really didn’t give a s~~~.