Im a 33 years old man who have been swimming in the jar so long, and this last 4 years since i catched my ex with another guy and other problems i begining to loose everything, (false) friends, self steem, and i have been suffering of anxiety during this years.

This years i have been avoiding relationships, im not ugly, i always have been lucky with girls but since that i just dont want a relationship and all my friends are married and lots of them with kids and i hate that. im not jealous im just seeing that all that is a waste of time.

Just yesterday making searchs over the internet about my “problems” i discovered that im out of the jar! not completely but beggining a new life, and yes its very very hard, my family is pushing me, people is looking at me like a weirdo or mad person…. but this is what i need, this online society is what i have been looking for this years and now i discovered it.

I just want to be completely out of the jar and stop swimming for a third person, i want to swim bymyself and for me

Hi all!!

I have just begun this adventure too.  Thanks for sharing your story and joining here, I hope you can pursue your dream of swimming for yourself.

All that we can really lose are our misconceptions.

Best wishes.

Yeah, that loses are not loses in reality, is better to say goodbye to people who doesnt give a s~~~ for other and are trapped on this competitive sick society. So i beggining to discover and feeling proud of what im doing. Now i want to do it right and not fall in the trap again and begin to feel happy on my own way.

Good we have more guys from Europe coming on line.

The numbers swell ?

I was hanging around with some couples the other day.  Just idle chit chat about absolutely nothing.  One of the wives was talking about a favourite band and about all the concerts she and her husband have seen – and she listed off all the places they caught shows in chronological order.  Her husband jumped in and said “I think we saw the concert in Boston before the one in Phili… Remember that we…” and before he could even express his whole thought she just dismissed the suggestion, shook her head, and insisted “No” – her version of history was correct and his version was wrong.  Zero interest in having actually SHARED the experience with her husband, zero interest in what he actually THOUGHT.  Even though this was apparently one of their favourite things to do together.  And he did what every good husband should do and just keep is mouth shut and let her get on with her story. And this is what most would describe as a perfectly healthy and successful marriage.

Today I see these relationships, these happy marriages between couples who are “just right” for each other, and I see all these small concessions, unending corrections in behaviour, and compromise after compromise, all to maintain “balance” and “peace” in the relationship.  F~~~ that.

I am master of my own ship and do not have anyone telling me where to turn, and will never go anywhere except my own way.

Cheers and once again, Welcome!

Follow your dreams, work hard and keep learning.
Nothing wrong with avoiding women that keep you from achieving those goals.

Cheers!