I’m losing patience and am finding myself unable to put up with people’s bulls~~~. So I have a policy to help me deal with people and decide whether they are worth my time or not.

The ‘F~~~ me around once’ policy.

For example, I have a work colleague(a girl, surprise surprise!) who invited me out with a bunch of friends for some birthday drinks. But here’s the kicker, she never told me when and where to meet. If you didn’t want me to come then why invite me? I wasn’t surprised really, and actually had a better night staying home than if I had gone out, so no loss.

Again this seems to be exclusive to women. Any time I have been invited out by male friends this never happens. If plans change they let me know etc etc

Anyway since she ‘F~~~ed me around’ I’ve decided to not bother with her anymore, still stay friendly at work(as you should with colleagues) but anymore invites etc will end with ‘No’ since I can now guess as to what type of person she is.

I know it may seem like a harsh policy to some, but since losing my ability to deal with bulls~~~, it’s the best way for me to be. It helps me cope and stay stress free.

The harsh reality is that most people(male or female) are just not worth your time.

Since becoming a MGTOW I have realized just how much bulls~~~ is going on around me and cant believe how I never noticed it before. It’s been there all along.

Your attitude is right on the money, but the first line really hit home. If you’re still losing patience , then you have a way to go still, because mine is gone. But it’s only in the last year or two that I have started drawing big fat lines (for even my own family). And I really LIKE it this way.

I recently mentioned an example of chick (23) who is cool and fun and we made plans to go out for a drink after work. The day before I confirmed in an email and actually ended the message by typing out “flake and die”. She responded in a hurry , assured me we where definitely on and she was very much looking forward to it.

The following day, 2 hours before we were supposed to meet, she sends a message about having to take care of her mom’s / family dog / blah blah / some totally predictable female s~~~…… BEGGING me to re-schedule. (F~~~ her if she thinks I’m playing second fiddle to a DOG – or anyone else). When I told her I wasn’t kidding and never tolerate flakes, she blew up my phone with even more apologies and was GENUINELY upset.

There was no reply from me and she is DEAD to me now. When a mutual friend of ours asked me why I was so unforgiving in front of his wife… I just said “one chance. Per chick. Per lifetime. No exceptions.“. And I said it with a smile.

This has a different impact than “f~~~ me around once (and you’re out)”.

“F~~~ me around once” is a good policy, but if you advertise it, it gives the impression of one too many butt-hurts, and you won’t teach anyone a lesson that way. It’s like you’re looking for a mistake, and it’s like writing a rule for THEM instead of YOU.

…. but “one chance. (Per chick). Per lifetime. No exceptions.” is a different attitude. It allows you to still go through life with a friendly and open attitude towards people and you may even show interest from time to time… but it’s a personal rule for YOU. Instead of drawing the line for others and setting a trap, you draw it for yourself. It’s a guideline for you – not them.

•••

Remember, when a woman asks you out, invites you, or initiates, she is asking for two reasons:

1. To find out if you have any other plans.

2. To see if you will say “yes” too easily.

Even if your birthday plans are to stay home and watch TV with a bucket of chicken, you don’t change them because she asked. You say “I already have plans”. So “no” is the right answer – but for another reason. Saying “no” because you don’t want to get flaked on is very different than communicating you have better things to do.

So if she really wants you to go, she has to make the effort to turn your “no” into a “yes”.
That’s the position you want to be in.

To be clear, I’m agreeing with you 100% (particularly the bottom line) – and endorse your policy – but you also want to show them THEY are scum and THEY are f~~~ed up and you hold yourself to higher standards. You want to show them it’s not your problem.

‘Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me’
Dont ever let anyone kick you in the teeth twice.

I am more of a don’t even kick me in the teeth once kind of guy. Women can be nice and friendly or they can get lost. I won’t be sticking around long enough to get kicked in the teeth.

So I told him “if you kick my leg, I’m gonna break yours”.
It took a while for it to really sink in, but he backed off eventually.

This attitude kinda stuck with me over the years and has served me very well.

You definitely have the right idea.

Cheers.

“I put my faith in the people, but the people let me down.” -Rare Earth-

<cite>@mgtow.com said:</cite>The following day, 2 hours before we were supposed to meet, she sends a message about having to take care of her mom’s / family dog / blah blah / some totally predictable female s~~~…… BEGGING me to re-schedule. (F~~~ her if she thinks I’m playing second fiddle to a DOG – or anyone else). When I told her I wasn’t kidding and never tolerate flakes, she blew up my phone with even more apologies and was GENUINELY upset.

This!

Flaking should simply not be tolerated. Then they sit around and wonder why they can’t get dates. I did the same thing in the summer, got the flake text hours before we were supposed to go out. When I replied “Go f~~~ yourself” the bitch was actually shocked. Their excuses border on my 4th grade excuses about why I didn’t to my homework. Women just don’t care and/or are stupid. They’ll cancel and a date and 5 seconds later their F~~~Book status is “I’m going out tonight!”

One told me she couldn’t go out because her son got hurt sledding and was in the hospital. She sent an 8 year old on a night sledding run without doing recon on the hill. Are women this stupid? Yes. On the other hand, sounds like another lame flake.