When I was younger I was the exact definition of a blue pill, white knight,mangina, beta male. I was that nice guy who always thought to do good things for women till I experienced a lot of bulls~~~ and realized I only did that for the ladies benefit. I always had that group of friends who only saw ladies as some ass and only wanted to f~~~. Now I understand why. I was always the opposite and as well the one to always get hurt which I never knew why. I would shower the girls with gifts, do what ever they wanted and bend over for them to f~~~ me over. That all started pretty much when I was in high school. I always thought that I would find the one but it wasn’t till now that I realized that was like trying to win the lottery.

I’ve tried the whole online dating and I’ve come across a handful of women but they all seem to be the same.We’d talk, meet up, I’d take them to some nice restaurant, buy them flowers and a gift. I’d drop like $50 on a dinner date and then I wouldn’t hear from them again. The women I have had a relationship in the past with would hurt me by lieing, cheating and just nag. My last relationship ended in 2008 and since then I’ve been on Okcupid and recently last year POF. But now I’m getting tired of looking for this so called unicorn and ready to go my own way.

This reminds me why I made my final decision. Back in 2007, I met this lady who worked with me. At that time, we were both 17. A month before my 18 birthday, my mom passed away from colon cancer. A couple months later her foster mom had passed away. At work we were always cool, she was funny, I’d make her laugh and we had a great time. We chilled a lot out of work. Instantly I had feelings for her and she really was there for me during my mom’s death as well I was there for her during her mom’s death. Long story short we made it official. She was so gorgeous, shorter than me with a cute face and nice ass from El Salvador.

During our relationship I would do anything for her. I was driving at the moment and she wasn’t. I would drive her and her friends everywhere. I would take her out to eat, buy her gifts and do whatever she wanted and needed. I would pick her up from school when she had summer school so she wouldn’t have to walk home everyday for five days a week. Then the bulls~~~ would start. She was the type to go out on the weekends to clubs and dress like a slut with short dresses. She was a drinker as well. I was scheduled to close on weekends at our job which closed at 1am on weekends. So she always went out cause she got off at 8pm. She loved to dance and I felt like I didn’t want to say no and not let her be happy. At times I would not feel comfortable with her going out cause I always thought something fishy.

Long story short again, we were only with each other for about 7 months. A coworker of ours..another female friends with her was telling me about her and to watch out. She didn’t want to give me more details. It was a rollercoaster with this chick. I found out she was messing around behind my back with several guys. Not all at once tho. First time I forgave her, it happened again, second time I forgave her. Now just like baseball, three strikes and your out! I was a forgiving person cause I know no one is perfect. I was way too nice but after the last guy, I finally got done with her. It was awkward cause we worked together. We were nothing, just only co workers and told her to not say anything to me unless it was work related.

This is where the best part comes in….a couple weeks later she comes in and runs to the back with her friend. I’m up front. I hear a loud “ohhhh noooo” . the first thing I thought was she must be pregnant. The following week I come to find out she was by one of the guys she slept with. As much s~~~ I did for her, I never got a piece of that ass and now thinking about it I’m glad I didn’t, cause she was at a point where she didn’t know who was the father and pointing fingers at all the guys. I even saved myself from getting a STD. So now she’s pregnant and the dude that knocked her up ran to California and straight up told her to stay out of his life.

From that time forward we were still not talking, but then I made the mistake of getting back in touch with her thru Facebook a year later and now she has the baby. She changed her behavior and enrolled into nursing school and got a new job. Stopped going out to bars/clubs and actually matured up.

Now it’s been 6 years and her son is older. She’s changed and we’ve been talking since the beginning of this year. I genuinely thought she was a changed person. My luck with online dating wasn’t really successful. So I ran back to her thinking she was a different person now. So we’ve been talking on and off taking it slow since the beginning of this year. I’ve taken her and her son out to eat and of course since I’m so nice, I’ve done many things or in her eyes favors. But she still hasn’t let me f~~~ which for some reason I still want to cause I feel I deserve it from all the bulls~~~ I’ve encountered with her. But at the same time I’m not too much in a rush to do that cause I don’t want to get her pregnant, not sure if she’s really changed and I’m not sure if she’s clean.

So the past 6 months I’ve been thinking a lot and I recently stumbled across this forum and read and educated myself. So now I’ve decided to cut her loose and go my own way. I doubt  she’s fully changed and I’m tired of the whole bulls~~~ dating thing and I finally realized after taking a handful of red pills is that I don’t need a woman anymore. I wanna do my own thing on my own time. I’m 25, will be 26 in January, I don’t have kids, never been married and I’m still young. I’ve read many stories and they all sound the same and I’ve taken a lot of red pills and now I want to go my own way. I want to be free, not tied down. I once read on a post ” a smart man learns from his mistakes…a genius learns from others mistakes”. I will not fall for womens traps and I won’t listen to society on how to live my life. I’m very fortunate that I came across this forum cause now im not alone.

I know this journey wont be easy, but sometimes when I see a woman walk by I’ll get on here, read a thread and it reminds me why I’m where I’m at. I don’t care for women any more or their bulls~~~. I will only respect them cause they’re humans but no more mister nice guy that they can f~~~ with anymore!!!

I apologize that my intro was so long. I look forward to reading and responding on future threads!!! By the way I’m located in the Washington  DC area, it would be nice to find out if one of my fellow brothers lived near me. I reside in VA but not far from DC in northern Va.

I get a bit s~~~ty sometimes that guys acted like I did yet were lucky enough not to get some “Hotty” pregnant,,, but them’s the breaks.
NOT getting to f~~~ that entitled bitch was probably the luckiest thing that ever happened to you.
Don’t think for a moment she didn’t know you wanted to f~~~ her all along.
Don’t think for a moment she didn’t accept your help and gifts knowing you wanted to f~~~ her all along.
She ruthlessly exploited you and your feelings, and every woman who saw it knew exactly what she was doing.

Sit back and watch it get pregnant to another guy in an attempt to trap a resource. It’ll make the same mistake of f~~~ing a carousal stud and expecting it’ll turn into a beta provider. The prettier they are, the more entitled they’ve been conditioned to think in the modern Kardashian age.
All beta guys bow down to her and she thinks, all men are like that. Alpha guys only deal with women like her and prey on their false sense of superiority.
Watch her eventually contact you one day, after the second or third baby, with her sudden self realisation that you were the one she always loved,,,,,,,,,lol Don’t laugh, this will happen.
You dodged a shotgun blast.

When I was younger I was the exact definition of a blue pill, white knight,mangina, beta male. I was that nice guy who always thought to do good things for women till I experienced a lot of bulls~~~ and realized I only did that for the ladies benefit.

You are in good company. Almost all men were when we were young.

MGTOW4LIFE1990 wrote:

So now I’ve decided to cut her loose and go my own way.

Smart move! Welcome to the path of freedom. Wherever it takes you, it beats a life of chains and slavery.

Welcome to the end my friend!